Lying about your sexuality?

Of course.

Normally with adults, as I have such a good way of talking to them, orientation is something I find they struggle with, unlike my age group.

E.g I was reading Boy Meets Boy in maths (I quit it and we could do what we want while the cleverer kids did advanced maths) and the teacher was just interested in what I was reading, obviously, i didn't want to turn it over so just said it was some book for english that wasn't very good. Hated that.

Needless to say, that book is so cute.

 

The few times I've changed doctors, or seen someone who I wasn't a patient of, they always ask your orientation around the same time as whether you're sexually active. I've never answered the orientation question honestly, mainly because it takes me off guard every time, and I don't see why it's their business when I'm being treated for something trivial.

Aside from my father, I've had a friend ask me if I was gay, out of the blue, to which I replied--in retrospect, honestly even--that no I was not. I followed this up by asking if I had just done something highly suspect or feminine, as it would have been a surprise to me. I hadn't, he said, so I assume it's just because that aside from talk I'm never out "chasing tail" like everyone else my age is.

 

Hi I saw ur lying about your sexuality blog and I have I was kinda cough on P0rn/gay so I blamed it on my freind I feel Realy bad about it that she was watching it because it is twice the action ya I regret it alot

 

Yea, I can't even admit it to people who know :lol:

 

in high school i never flaunted my sexuality im hardly even out of the closet, and in high school people wouldnt directly ask but they would ask certain questions for instance are you going to homecoming and i would say sure. then they would ask are you taking a boy or girl...i usually just said friends. now at my current work place i have people ask if im married which is mostly from elderly people not realizing im only 18 and my co workers who ask if i have a boyfriend...i feel awkward about being so open about it ya know? i hate feeling like im hidding who i am but sometimes you feel like you have too. strange world.

 

I think I've been lying to myself about mine. Which is probably worse.

 

I don't think I have ever been asked directly about my sexuality....I was dating a guy for two years and dress feminine so most people never suspected. Now that I am open at school people don't have to ask because people either know or don't care enough to know. If my extended family has never suspected because of my reasons already stated, but if they were to ask I would lie....not sure how they would take it and not ready to come out to them yet...

 

We were at sushi today, me and some friends and my sister. I was interrogating my friend about who he was facebook stalking. His sister asked why I wanted to know so bad. Then one girl goes, "Cuz he's gay." I froze. I never told any of them I was. I paused and quietly said no. I couldn't even speak up enough to make the lie heard. Then she was like, "there was some hesitation there."

This all just happened. Needless to say I just feel like crap. Being on the verge of tears isn't helping either.

 

Sorry to hear that happened to you, if you aren't out it's pretty damned impertinent for a friend to put you on the spot like that, and then follow it up with a comment like that. Was this a close friend, or just a member of the extended group at the restaurant?

 

I don't think I have ever actually lied but I have very obviously avoided questions when asked.

 

Agreed... I lied to myself for years, and mainly to keep everyone happy. Now that I've broken away from that mentality I've become happier and more comfortable.

It takes time to get to at point and even longer to the point where you are comfortable enough to be open about it. That's where I'm trying to head.

 

I did one time lol. I was working at a body shop and this spanish guy came over to help us with a car and brought his son who was probably 18 or so, back when I was 20.. anyways, his son was frigging gorgeous and apparently all the eye contact I was making with him must have made him mention it to his dad.. We ended up talking about something and he asked me if I liked girls or if.... um.. lol. yeah. and I lied about it and I felt like shit. But I didn't want to freak his son out because he was fucking hot.. I'm sorry.. It was hot out and he had a tank top on all day and he was just sexy, I couldn't keep my eyes off him haha.

 

I've avoided it, but I don't believe that I have ever lied. Of course most people don't ask me "Hey, are you a pansexual/grey-a/demi-romantic?" If somebody ever asked that then I would say yes. Mostly because they must be psychic or something so they can read my mind anyway so there's no point in lying.

 

She is a newer friend of mine. Met her through my good friend and I thought she was cool. Apparently she is just mean.

 

I always find those questions highly intrusive.
It's pretty much outing.
FUCK THOSE PEOPLE!! WE GET TO CHOOSE TO TELL OR NOT TO.

Anyways, personally with older people (50+), I sometimes correct them when they go: "I'm sure your boyfriend is happy with you", if I feel I need to. Younger people I have no problem telling, if the topic is brought up (I'm not holding the closet door but I don't feel I have an obligation to tell every soul that I'm a lesbian... who I want to do stuff with is my problem, NOT other people's).

Also, today I was with my mom getting my hair done and the guy doing it was like "Ooh... Like this you'll get a boyfriend in no time". I soooooooo wanted to say: "you mean: 'girlfriend'", but I didn't because my mother was there. She knows I'm a lesbian, but she is NOT out as a LGBT mother. She wants me to keep it a secret (so no gay bars, no telling my friends, no Pride, no rainbow bracelet and of course, no women) and I really didn't want to have the "don't tell people" conversation with her.

So, I would have outed her if I had said to Michael (the guy ironing my hair): "Dude, I'm gayer than a rainbow", actually. *sigh*
It's annoying... To a level it sort of drags me back to the closet.

 

That really sucks. Sorry.

 

Well at least it isn't sudden insensitivity by someone you know well and hold dear, but that's still very impertinent.

It sounds like she's asking you not live your life... Isn't that an issue?

 

Dw life will get better! I used to tell everyone "NO IM NOT GAY" when ever they asked me, now my family doesn't ask because they know I'm becoming more comfortable and might actually come out JUST BE U A STOMP SOME BITCHEZZ WHO BE MEAN!

 

the first time i met one of my now very close friends...i literally sat down and was asked if i was gay. I wasn't out of the closet at the time and i wasn't even sure of the answer myself and so my immediate answer was no. i felt bad until i came out to her and she started making jokes with me about it.

there was also a time before this when someone i had been friends with for about 4-5 years and worked with for about 2 years just asked me out of the blue when i went into work...when i asked why he just said he heard some rumors and i shrugged it off.