At work, I sometimes hear the guys joking around about the possibility of someone they know being queer or saying they're "lucky the guy wasn't one of those" and etc. Inferring that there is something wrong with being any form of queer. They mean it light-hearted and don't mean to offend anyone in the room - they don't know "one of those" is in the room with them. It just can really bother me sometimes, like whenever I hear a group of guys joke around about it like that I usually shrink back in my chair or take a step away afraid that they'll find out and their jokes will turn to me. Has this ever happened to anyone else? What do you think when you overhear this kind of 'joking' around?
No, it doesnt get to me. I have had to deal with my own inter-issues to such extremes that my skin has always been like concrete lol. Though on a similar note. When I hear people talking about the LGBT people/topics, I reacted just like I would if they were speaking ill of anyone or anything else. Especially the ones who make the claims that they wouldnt want gay people arent them because they would feel uncomfortable that they man/woman would want them. Honestly, I think it has been for the best that no one has ever insinuated such things around me. It always seems to be the most discusting individuals that talk like that, and if they refered to me or anyone else specifically when I was around I would eat them alive, with my brutal and honest opinion of them. Some people say two wrongs dont make a right. But if you are going to go around claiming that I am attracted to you, than I believe I should have the right to inform anyone how simply grotesque I find you. I mean really, are we supposed to just shrug when people claim lies about us :/. So ingeneral, criticism doesnt really get to me. Though whenever I see it, I will be the first to speak out. Although, I really dont care, many people will. I have more own opinions and philosophies on why people put others down, so I understand that it isnt something that will ever 'stop'. But I will be damned if sit back and allow it to be done to other people in my presence.
I get this a lot from my group of friends. Most of them are straight guys and throw around the word 'fag', 'gay boy' etc. round like crazy. It doesn't really bother me, what bothers me most is when those I'm out to always look at me when they hear anything that could be considered negative towards me, but I'm personally cool with it. It takes a lot to offend me. Since I came out to my best friend, he likes to joke about my sexuality a lot, but that's just him. He gets called gay more than I do!
Sometimes even when my friends do it to or around me and I know it's 100% not serious I still can get aggravated about it. Most jokes people make that come from a place of portraying gayness as less than rub me the wrong way and I generally don't tolerate friends saying fag or faggot. Last time my stepdad said faggot jokingly I told him to stop or else I'd hit him in the nuts, he did it again so i kicked him so hard he lost one for a good 30 minutes.
If its friends that know I'm gay and I know they are just messing around, then no I have no problem. If its a stranger or people who don't realize that I'm gay, then yes and I have no problem in either politely confronting people or just confronting them. One of the main reasons why I came out was to be able to speak out in those situations actually. To this day I will say something even if it doesn't offend me directly. I know there are closeted people so if I can speak up for them then I will do it.
Depends if the people are trying to put me or another LGBTQ person down. if not I have no right to try and say anything to them.
I make the most gay jokes at my school…it's my cover. But I'm always sure not to make them derogatory.
Yes, I don't like the teasing at all, especially since I'm barely coming out to people. But this is more so with my family, actually. My older sister will call me stuff like "carpet muncher" and expect me to just laugh it off, but I just don't like that. Honestly, I don't like being teased in general about my orientation.
jokes are only jokes, they can't hurt you if you accept yourself completely, so smile and forgive person who makes them
I don't really mind people calling us inferior, it just gives us an excuse to prove them wrong. :lol:
Sometimes. The jokes themselves don't offend me, I could make jokes like those myself, in an ironic/sarcastic way. I don't really do that, though. What bothers me is like others have said, the fact that people make these jokes. If they just were to think rationally for second, they could know that in most social settings where they say such a thing, someone gay (closeted or not) could hear them and could be offended.
If we were to think rationally for a second, we wouldn't be offended because it shouldn't matter. Rational thought is a skill no one has perfectly mastered, so don't get mad at other people for not thinking rationally when you probably don't yourself. I'm not saying I do, I'm saying no one does.
Oh dear, there is no such thing as 'light hearted' joking. Sure, they are not actively agressive against LGBT, or showed actual hate, but that doesn't mean they were just "joking". Often, when people use a "joking" tone on their voice while saying things they know will hurt people. For example: [A] "lucky the guy wasn't one of those" "Hey, that's offensive" [A] "Hey why so worked out, I was just joking!" "Joking" is used as a defense for when people want to say something that is offensive to others, as if just by "not meaning it" will excuse them for saying it in first place. Thing is, it is not. No light hearted joking is joking at all. Is just a poor excuse to despise people without being critizised for it. Having said that, only one time I had to actually make an effort to swallow my anger over a comment (made by my dad) but other times I heard something like that, I just let it slip. Well, I actually get mad, but that's because I don't tolerate ignorant people.
It really gets to me since my best guy friend makes very rude remarks against gay people every day. I tell him some people are offended by that but he says they aren't people. I think i only take offense concerning some people depending on the strength of the joke or slander.
Nope not at all and I'll joke around also if I am still in the closet around them and it just doesn't offend me like it used to.
