1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

"That's gay."

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Onyxknight, Nov 7, 2012.

  1. Onyxknight

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2012
    Messages:
    136
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Born KY, been in OK for most of my life
    I'm just wondering how you, as members of the LGBTQ community, feel about society using this phrase. Do you get offended, don't give a crap, say it yourself? I'm curious to see your responses.
     
  2. myheartincheck

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Sep 25, 2012
    Messages:
    2,461
    Likes Received:
    3
    Location:
    The Golden State with a Golden Gate
    Gender:
    Genderqueer
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Some people
    It doesn't really bother me because I've heard it so much, but it offends me. Does that make sense? lol Like it's really immature to equate homosexuality to something lame, but I'm sorta desensitized because I've heard it said so much. :confused:
     
  3. Pain

    Pain Guest

    It kinda makes me upset, and I make it kind of a joke. If they say "That's gay" (whoch they've stopped, generally, because of me :wink: ) I make it literal and they just get annoyed by that, so they don't so much any more :slight_smile:
     
  4. rainbowbear

    rainbowbear Guest

    This post pretty much describes my feelings. :confused:
     
  5. Onyxknight

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2012
    Messages:
    136
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Born KY, been in OK for most of my life
    It doesn't bother me at all. I say it myself sometimes, and when other people say it, I don't automatically get my back up against the wall, I don't immediately assume that they're being "derogatory", I guess, toward LGBT people.
     
  6. Pret Allez

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 19, 2012
    Messages:
    6,785
    Likes Received:
    67
    Location:
    Seattle, WA
    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Some people
    It depends on how it's used. My straight ally friends say it ironically. When I don't know the intentions of the speaker, I find it extremely hurtful, and I instantly get confrontational.
     
  7. Mogget

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2010
    Messages:
    2,397
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    New England
    I find it offensive and contemptible. And I have no patience for using offensive terms ironically.
     
  8. kageshiro

    kageshiro Guest

    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2012
    Messages:
    655
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    in your soul
    I don't like it. Even hearing it from friends who are 100% supportive of me and my people makes me twinge inside a bit. I wont comment on it or hold it against them cause I know they really don't mean anything derogatory by it. But at the same time I wish they just wouldn't.
     
  9. Amicus

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Oct 5, 2012
    Messages:
    209
    Likes Received:
    0
    In my mind there's a huge distinction between making gay jokes and using the word "gay" to mean "bad." The former absolutely does not require the latter. I think it's unacceptable even in a joking context. This is not to say that I think it's bad to make gay jokes or things like that as long as they're not malicious, but I'm really repelled by the idea of gays being inferior being programmed into our language. Somehow I think the humor world will survive without using the word in a discriminatory way.
     
  10. justinf

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 3, 2012
    Messages:
    1,212
    Likes Received:
    42
    Location:
    Amsterdam
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    This. All my friends, straight and gay, use it, and I know they're the most supportive people you'll ever meet. They really don't mean no harm.
    However, if it's someone I don't know, I generally confront them about it.

    We did have a conversation about it with my friends as well (years ago), but I know they mean it well, and wouldn't just use it around anyone; it's a friends thing, so I'm cool with it.
     
  11. julia

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2012
    Messages:
    461
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    New York City
    Everyone uses that phrase around here so it doesn't phase me much. I try not to look into too much when I hear someone say it because all my friends say it and they are 100% for gay rights/marriage. So.
     
  12. santaberry

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Nov 5, 2012
    Messages:
    178
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Downton Abbey
    Expressions like that mean nothing to me anymore because I just choose not to take offense to them.
     
  13. everlongview

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2012
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Cleveland-ish
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    90% of the time I don't give a shit; I say it myself sometimes. It's only when I don't know the intentions or views of the person saying it that it affects me at all, and even then it's only a little bit. It's sort of evolved by now to the point that when people say "Oh wow that's so gay" they're not immediately thinking in reference to gays themselves, just "oh wow that's dumb" and move on to their next statement and they don't, y'know, just sit and dwell over the evils of homosexuality or whatever.
     
  14. Olivier

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Oct 12, 2012
    Messages:
    97
    Likes Received:
    0
    I find it insensitive.
     
  15. Gekko

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Apr 23, 2012
    Messages:
    86
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    It bothers me because I take it like they were talking about me while talking about something else. When people say that something is gay it gives me the impression that is how they perceive gay people.
     
  16. Zontar

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Oct 22, 2010
    Messages:
    1,802
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Binghampton, NY
    I become rather curious as to why they would describe something as clean, creative, stylish, and open-minded.
     
  17. Sherri

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2012
    Messages:
    133
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    USA
    It doesn't upset me, and I think it's silly that others get so offended by it. Words are just tools devoid of meaning until their users give it to them. The intent of the person wielding the tool is what's important, and most people simply don't mean to be derogatory to gay people in any way when using such terminology. It's slang. This, too, shall pass. I have better things to be upset over.
     
  18. Lad123

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2012
    Messages:
    525
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    England
    +1 :slight_smile:
     
  19. Pret Allez

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 19, 2012
    Messages:
    6,785
    Likes Received:
    67
    Location:
    Seattle, WA
    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Some people
    No. Words are given meaning by listeners.
     
  20. Neutrality

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jun 24, 2012
    Messages:
    426
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    NC
    This is how I feel.