What are your experiences of Gay bars? Never been before, but might be going soon for the first time But I have no idea what to expect or anything, from what I've been told the bar I'm going to ranges from 'indie teens' to mature older men and isn't your typical 'Gay Bar(lack of a better term) as in like karaoke/really camp singers and stuff. But just a casual atmosphere. So yeah, wondering what everyone's experiences and opinions are?
not sure where about in the scottish of lands you are but i know some ones that are a dive. so i would best avoid those but i cant say them i dont think as for privacy idk... it does help if you go to a good one rather than one thats crappy haha. have friends been to the one youre going to before? talk to them, ask them what its like apart from what you know already obv. ive never been to one as im not the clubbing type but friends have and they say its just a regular club but with gay folk in it XD hmm... i see... gay bar oops. i was thinking of a diff thing haha. but it will prob just be a normal bar with gay folk in it.... with bars the only thing i would be scared of is the lull when everyones convo dies down then gets going again lol, too quiet for my liking unless some loud people are in :lol: maybe im thinking of a total diff thing again but you know like gay cafes that kinda thing, but instead its a bar. well yeah. hmm. im prob no help at all D: you can go and if you dont like it then you dont have to go again
The ones I've been in are just the same as any other bar. The only difference is that everyone is friendly and nobody judges anyone. Yeah there's some harmless bitchiness and banter, but it's nothing like the fights that go on in other bars I've been in. And it's not just purely gay people in them. A lot of straight people go to gay bars because they prefer them.
Gay bars can be extremely fun. I've met a few now close friends there. They also showed me that stereotypes of gay guys were very far off base a lot of times. I found bears to be the nicest and sweetest people I've met.
I don't know if you'd count it as a "gay bar"; it's known as an underage/gay club where kids as young as 13 can go to hang out, and they have drag contests on the weekends. My first experience was at about 2 in the morning, heading back toward home from another club we'd been at. A work friend and I walked in and sat on the speakers, then she went to the bathroom or something. Al l of a sudden a guy shows up and starts raving. He stands there and raves almost in my face for about 5 minutes or so, but it felt like a lot longer cause he was staring at me the whole time. It was really cool looking, but it made me uncomfortable, lol.
The gay bar I went to had the best dance music, people actually dancing (rather than standing along the wall acting too cool to dance), and very scantily clothed people (like guys running around in their underwear). It was lots of fun.
I went once, it was cool. Comically though due to the "ebb and flow" I turned into a kinsey 2 half-way through my time there lol.
I go to one every other week for a board game night they have. I'm not usually a bar person though so that's the only time I ever go. But people there tend to be very friendly. It also depends on the bartender though. Usually, the Monday night bartender is a nice guy. But every so often, the bartender is this sleazy older man who likes to talk about seeing young guys' penises. Less of that would be kind of nice.
I've just got home (3.30am lol) from a night outwhere myself and a fewfriends visited several gay bars in Birmingham. As one friend put it to me the firsttime he introduced me to Birmingham's gar bars - 'it's just a pub'. It's true that there are some dives, but for every dive there is a really friendly place where you will be made to feel welcome and/or left alone, whatever your preference. For the first time tonight I entered a gay bar and sat alone waiting for my friends to turn up - rather than going in with them or them already being there, and it was great having that confidence - I never would have done that a fewmonths ago. I've met loads ofgreat people who I now consider friends. Only thing I can't figure out is why so many straight women go to gay bars, then make it their mission to try and chat up every guy in there - even when they are toldpoint blank that they are barking up the wrong tree. They never gave me a second look when I wanted badly to be straight! Grrrrr... Sorry for the spelling - like I said, I just got in, and I may have had a pint or several during the evening... What I'm trying to say, albeit in a roundabout way, is go out and give it a try - as my friend said 'Its just a pub'!
My experiences have been fairly limited (only three times I went), but on the whole quite positive. All three were very much "just a regular bar, but explicitely advertising to be gay-friendly". So most of the patrons were gay, but there were definitely also straight people there (which was good, because I always took a few friends with me). Mostly it was what you'd expect from a straight bar: people drinking, socialising, just hanging around with friends. A bit more gay PDA (and even there: pretty tame stuff. Just holding hands and kissing), perhaps. I didn't actually talk to anyone but the friends I took with me. In fact, it seems it was mostly my straight friends having fun flirting with the gay patrons. But I did feel very much at ease and got a bit of a confidence booster just knowing there were a lot of gay people around who were being out and socialising and not getting any bad reactions for it. Haven't been to one in over a year now, but that's mostly because I'm lazy and it's easier going to the straight bar where I've been going for years now...
I think Filip has summed it up nicely. For me gay bars aren't about meeting potential partners, although I wouldn't rule it out - it's more about being able to enjoy a drink with friends while feeling safe, and gaining confidence in myself while surrounded by like-minded people. Even now I've sobered up somewhat though, I still can't get my head around those straight women though... :bang:
there is only one I go to because it is the only place that isn't like a club, and guys aren't climbing all over eachother and actting like horny animals.
I'll see your Gay Bar and raise you The Anvil. Is there anyone else who feels they need an invitation to step into one? I went to one before and there wasn't much unusual about it, but I really felt like I shouldn't be there, like a demon in church, and as I left, I thought that someone called "Faker!" behind me, but that was most likely just my imagination. Maybe it's because I'm so intrinsically ungay that even little things like being in a gay bar cause me anxiety. Mind you, I'd treat a "local" with a similar wariness and entrance protocol.
It can be hit or miss depending what you go there to do. I enjoy drag performances so when there are those going on I always have a good time and I usually go to dance with friends and have fun not really worrying about finding a guy. They can be sleazy at times however I have had more good experiences meeting really nice and interesting people than bad experiences. I am still friends with some of the people I have met at the club/bar and almost dated one of them!