To fellow highschoolers

Back at high school I definitely cared about popularity. Now, I don't care what people think of me. Popular people are only popular because others treat them like they're something special. All of those so called 'popular' kids end up having it rough when they leave school because they suddenly face a reality in which not everything is about them.

Be sociable, be friendly and have lots of friends, but don't forget about those that maybe aren't so popular. I lost so many true friends by following those that didn't really give a shit about me. In their eyes, school is a dog-eat-dog environment and it's true, they will back stab you.

By all means, have a wide variety of friends, just don't have an ego with it. You can be popular, but for the right reasons.

 

I definitely am not popular in college, but I really don't care. I think(hope) I've learned from high school where I never was popular, but always tried to impress other people or make everyone happy that it's just not going to happen. So, I quit trying and honestly by doing so I've got a lot more close friends that I know have my back and I'm a lot happier.

btw I'd go to the smaller party with friends. Those ones with people you know always end better

 

I think I was blessed in this respect in the fact that at my school, there was no 'popular' group.

My year was kinda small, 80 or so people, and there was a definite divide. But it wasn't popular v not. It was more... normal people v angry chavvy people.

So no, I didn't care about popularity at my school, because everyone was friends with everyone if you weren't an angry dick. Literally at break everyone would go to the same spot, was usually a good 40 or so people there and just hang out.

College is completely different, but still no 'popularity' exists. It's big enough that people just mind their own business.

So yeah, I've never experienced this 'popular' fad that Hollywood/media pays so much attention too, and I'm glad I haven't. I've spent my entire teenage and adult life doing what ever I wanted/look how ever I want and never faced any social repercussions because of it.

Edit:

Actually I take some of that back, last year was the first time where I mildly felt the popular 'fad'. My first year in college, meeting new people etc etc was exciting, and schools mingling together. I met some people who attended a different school, and truthfully you could tell that they were the 'popular' group at their school (but no longer popular at college, because I think that thing kinda dies down once you grow up and out of it. But still, they were the type of people where you can just tell that they were popular/had alot of friends at their secondary school, ye know?) , and I did get close to them. They invited me to their new years eve party, and so did my school friends. I decided to go to the non-school friend party to meet new people (since I'm kinda social and do enjoy meeting new people), and truthfully it was easily one of the worst and most boring nights of my life haha.

So if I was you, I'd go to the party where you know people well and know that you'll have a good time. Going to a party just for the sake of popularity will likely just bore you if you don't really know the people there.

 

Interesting question. I've found Sixth Form a lot less hierarchical than general school was and those that count themselves as popular aren't actually liked by the general consensus. A girl in my year is as irritating as anything but she's the top of the foodchain, someone rubbed her name of the blackboard... and continues to do so each time she puts it back on!

Personally, I'm similar as I fit around different groups and have friends in different 'areas' as such, although many of these are just for lessons as they hang out in different places during the day and I never see them. I can talk to anyone really, but I wouldn't want to stick at the top of the popularity list as you're the most watched and everyone knows your business.

The only problem I have is worrying what people think of me, thus trying to please everyone and never really saying how I really feel. There are some people who dislike me for who I am but I have to live with them as they're friends with my friends.

My old school friend (and we come from a very rural primary school) did everything she could to be popular, including losing some of her old friends - we're only still friends because she doesn't have a knack with boys and likes having me as a backup!

I got through secondary school by knowing the right people before they got too popular, they left me alone and I got away with murder at there expense. They weren't the brightest set of thugs, but some were alright.

Are you actually happier going to a place where you may feel less wanted by the people? Although if it's a NYE party, I'm sure they'll all be drunk anyway!

 

i never cared about popularity at school. but i was always in the popular group and hung around with gangs. well until year ten then i choose not to hang around with these people cause i was gettng into trouble and almost got kicked ot of school. and i just didnt like all the arguing and friction these guys and girls caused.
so i began hanging round with what were known as the nerds. i still spoke to my old friends but the 'nerds' were alot nicer people.
i didnt get intivted to partys and pubs every weekend but who cares i prefered being unpopular and finshing school getting my grades than knowing everyone, drinking all weekend, fighting and failing. plus i didnt know how horrible i was to my family before this.

 

popularity? ha! shit , nobody is popular in my school , i prefer the term "well known" , all i was worried about in my freshman year was making at least one friend since i had to go to a different high school because i didn't live in the area where the school was where i wanted to

anyways , i promised myself ....i was like "i promise not to sit alone at lunch , i'll sit with one friend or someone i know" and what happens?

i go and sit down at this table with a bunch of girls (that i didn't know) and they all got up and left. seriously that's what they did but i eventually made 3 friends for the whole year (how exciting!) but this year , i have at least over 10 friends

popularity isn't my priority , making friends is...wanting to be well known isn't what i want , if anything ...i'd rather be unknown than well known personally

 

Exactly, my schools have always been large and diverse enough to the point in which there wasnt really a popular group. There wasnt even really a individual who was well known by everyone. In elementary school, I was a bit of a loner. Not because I wasnt accepted or extremely shy, I just didnt really care for my peers.(The schoo was actually extremely small with next to zero diversity.) From then on, I have always been at fairly large school and I have faired much better in those. So no one was really 'popular', but I was more of the well known/liked.

I've never really cared or tried. I have been told that I have a 'amusing/comical' personality and I'm quite outspoken so I guess thats why. Another reason is probably because even though I was more of a loner 'by choice', feeling seperated still wasnt a very pleasant experience and I couldnt imagine what it was feel like to feel that way and still reach out, only to be rejected by their peers. So I do everything I can to reach out to those who dont have a lot of friends or arent doing well socially, and I have made many friends and aquintances that way.

 

To answer your questions:

How interested are you in popularity?
Yawn. Popularity is stupid.

Do you change your image to fit in?
I don't think wearing neon practically everyday is changing my image, so nah.

Are you part of the "cool" group in your year? Or are you not so popular?
Nope, I'm part of the weird group. I love them c:. And I honestly don't care what anyone thinks.

If you are popular, do you find it fulfilling, and if you're not, does this bother you?
This doesn't bother me at all. Being different is fun and I meet wonderful people who are also different... like my crush c:.

 

I tried to hide in the shadows throughout high school. This worked well my freshman, sophomore and junior year. My senior year I because really popular on accident. I made a series of videos that aired on the morning announcements. Everybody loved them. They were comedy videos.

I never changed who I was to fit in. I actually enjoyed not being popular. I had a good group of friends and I didn't care about my social status.

I'm not in the "cool" kids group in college. There really isen't a cool kids group once you get to college. Some people think that they are cool, but those are usually the ones that go and party every night.

It never bothered me not to be popular. It actually bothered me more when I became popular.

 

I mostly didn't care about popularity in high school and still don't at Uni. But back in high school, I'll admit that it did feel nice that some people knew me by word of mouth, and that they knew me because of my personality. At times when people didn't know who I was, they would act really immature about it, i.e. "Who the hell is that?" or "I don't know who they are so I don't really care."

But overall, I'm glad I wasn't/am not popular because I prefer less friends and less pressure to conform with the rest of crowd.

And I agree, when you get to Uni/college, there is no such thing as popularity anymore, at least in a general sense. When you're in smaller settings however, like a school club/organization/frat party, then the issue of popularity is much more common.

 

im a sophomore and i definately wouldn't call myself "popular". i guess im not particularly unpopular either- i have my group of friends and am cool with that. i guess i kinda wanted to be popular earlier, especially in middle school, but now i love my crazy, weird friends and wouldn't trade them for all the popularity in the world. besides, i always found being popular to simply not be worth the effort. you have to look the right way, know the right people, and act a specific way and ive always found that most people enjoy making fun of the "popular" kids more than anything. most people dont actually like them, they're legends in their own minds only. i never wanted to conform and give up being me just in order to be invited to a couple more parties.

so i guess its up to you, but i would say you should hang out with the people who love you (ie your friends), instead of chasing after some "cool" group on the off chance they might choose to accept you.

 

i am too depressive to be around the "cool" folk, at least in my school, as they are all generally very happy and love to have fun and be crazy. i'm laid back and since i'm not 'normal' gender-wise, i often feel like i dont fit in with the girls or the boys.
the friends i am semi close with are dorky and not popular. we tend to be the kids in the background who no one really thinks about until they see your picture in the yearbook 6 years later

 

I'm not really interested at all in popularity. As long as I have good friends, I don't care who they are. I don't change my image in the slightest to fit in. I'm not really part of the "cool" group, but I am pretty much friendly with and talk to almost everyone, even the "cool" kids. I'm not interested in constantly being with the "cool" kids, because all they do is get wasted and drunk.

 

Was I part of the popular group in high school? Nope
Did I care? Not at all

I had several friends who I was extremely close to and then some just okay friends. I wasn't necessarily part of only one "group" because I had friends who fell into different circles and because of that I could hang out with a multitude of "groups." In fact, my bestie and I spent a good majority of the time making inside jokes of how dumb people in the popular group were lol.

 

when i stopped caring about being cool or popular and just did what i wanted and wore what i liked, i became extremely awesome.

 

During my years in middle school that's what I was looking for, popularity, but it just turned out once I found where I truly did fit in the idea of being popular dropped out the window! You really don't want to be popular, trust me, all you get is a bunch of people that want you for something, for the status, the money, free car rides, ect. Once you do find that group or them few people just hang with it you'll find life is a lot better without having to worry about your social status. When I went into highschool with that idea it worked for me and helped make me less stressed.

 

I'm not even in high school yet I'm Realy not even In middle school yet but some of my freinds are all In high school and yes they did just go in high school and then like the "group" of kids that they were with they stopped becase ppl were calling them gay so they stopped and now they haing out with a bunch of f*****s (and the ppl that they stared to haing out with are the ones that were calling them gay) I stared that out but I hate the kids that they haing out with (just a btw I got held back so I should be in 8th grade I got held back 2 times) but ya

 

Distinct cliques don't tend to form in my school, people who you would probably label as "popular" also hang out with those who wouldn't appear to be so. I only know one real "nobody" in my class, but he put himself in his situation, just such a hatable character, he managed to offend practically every gender, religion, ethnicity, religious background, and sexual orientation in the first week of school, he once claimed that "women were a subspecies" in a class taught by a feminist, former IDF commander, female; sadly she didn't hear him. For any Battle Royale fans, think Toshinori Oda.
Back to the rest, I was once sitting in a room, studying with a "popular" friend of minewhom I happen to pathetically have a crush on, even though he is clearly straight (possibly bi). We ended up talking about the high-school social scene. I jokingly used a parable I created off the spot: "high school is like a river, the big rocks at the top become polished, the smaller and weaker ones break". So friggin true.

 

I was a loser all the way through school - at the bottom of the popularity ladder, until I fell off it altogether sometime in year 11 and people stopped acknowledging my existence. I think my coping mechanism was to be a very "why would I ever want to be popular?" type.