Gay friendly houseshares - America

What are you coming for - do you have a job you will want to live near? You will want to check out the MTA's subway and bus maps (found online) so you know where you prefer to be. Do you care about the safety of the neighborhood? Consider things like having to come home at night and walk several blocks because you are not right next to public transportation. Or if your commute will be long because you have multiple transfer and local subways (vs. express) between you and work.

NYC is very large and diverse, so there is no one answer that applies to every neighborhood. Most people do not live right near work, a majority in NYC work in Manhattan but live out in a surrounding borough - generally Brooklyn, the Bronx, or Queens because the living is cheaper and there is more space. You'll have to consider what are the most important aspects of the living situation to you - there is something pretty much for everyone, but your budget will limit things. Like I'm not sure what you mean by a sharehouse, but if you mean you would have roommates, then yes that is common everywhere, but you'll likely only have a room in maybe a 3-bedroom apartment (not a whole house in Manhattan, the brownstones would be way out of your price range), and the space might be a lot smaller than what you're used to.

One of the best resources I could recommend for learning about the neighborhoods here for someone who really doesn't know them at all is: NYC Neighborhoods Guide - NabeWise, neighborhoods revealed

If you want gay-friendly, near a lot of restaurants, easy commute to lower Manhattan, and safe to walk in, you'll probably like places like Prospect Park (Brooklyn) or Chelsea - but keep in mind, these are very expensive and small compared to other neighborhoods. You can live almost anywhere here and be safe in the daytime, but safety at night depends on the neighborhood. Finding gay-friendly spaces is much more likely the more money you spend - if you decide to save a lot of money and live in a cheap area of northern Manhattan or an outer borough, you are more likely to be uncomfortable because that's where new immigrant populations live and they are more conservative about being gay, even though tons of gay folk of all backgrounds live in these places and manage fine.

I'm not sure where one would look for gay-specific roommate situations, other than doing and internet search and seeing what websites come up, but for general apartment rent searches you can start with sites like trulia.com, zillow.com, and craigslist.com
If you want fancy expensive apartments in Manhattan and Brooklyn check out corcoran.com, that's where all the posh real estate is. Just click on the "rent" tab and check your preferences, they will tend to list all the neighborhoods (there are a lot) so you can pick exactly which ones you'll consider, but remember these are not perfect, where you are in the neighborhood will change your experience, sometimes dramatically. If possible, rent under a month-to-month lease when you first get here, and speak to some Australians who have moved here for the best info on differences. Once you've lived in NYC for a month or three you'll understand it better and can move if you like something else better. Then you can sign a yearly lease and get a better deal.

As for payment, it is standard for an apartment to have to go through a credit check and application before being approved. They may also as for proof that you have a job here, and references either from a former landlord or from employers - it just depends on the situation. (If you don't have a job and need to pay cash, you will likely have to deal with a kind of seedy situation of crashing in somebody else's place with no legal lease to protect you.) Once you have approval, you can pay each month by check to the individual renting, or if it is a company you can probably set up automatic debit through your bank account if you prefer. It is standard to pay monthly, even if your lease is much longer. Beware of renting with a bunch of roommates in a sublet, subletting is illegal in a lot of apartments but due to money problems people do it anyway a ton. The only problem is having no legal lease to protect your rights - like to working heating - and being forcibly evicted from your apt when the landlord finds out what is going on. If you want to avoid that, then be sure to ask if the place can legally be rented to you and that you have legal documents to sign that explain the lease and your rights, these should come with every apartment. You can do an informal arrangement with a bunch of gay guys, that is common enough, but you'll need to be flexible then in case you suddenly have no place to stay.

You can also try contact LGBT resources in Manhattan and asking them, they may have lots of great info and even know of someone looking for roommates. If you want an actual house with a floor to yourself and a yard, then you'll have to check out the other boroughs, Manhattan doesn't have anything like that you could afford.

Real estate in NYC is kind of a hobby of mine, so if you have more questions feel free to hit me up.