Would you even consider dating someone who was HIV positive?

It is normal. He's probably upset because he's heard it before. That's how I feel - I'm not HIV positive, but I feel for him.

Instead of blowing up at you, he should have said "why? Can you just hear me out?"

 

I'm not an expert on the topic, but I think it's important to err on the side of caution. If you're uncomfortable being with someone who has HIV that's entirely ok and not bigotry. You have no obligation to him or to anyone else. Don't let him make you feel bad, I don't think you did anything wrong by gently telling him you didn't think it would work out. Take care of yourself.

 

I wouldn't, nor would I date someone that was positive for any sti.

Maybe if I was good friends with someone that was + and I grew to love them over time I would be ok with the risk, but I wouldn't risk my health otherwise.

 

I can honestly see both sides of this story, but to be honest, I can relate more to how you reacted. I am also paranoid about STDs and especially HIV, so I would have done the same. I think it's unreasonable for him to have blown up on you. He doesn't even know you and is blowing up on you; I think the appropriate response for him would have been to shrug it off and move on. I think it shows something about his character too.

 

I dont think that you actually did anything wrong. While the response you can could have been put more delicately, it was not all that bad to begin with, especially for a dating site.

I am terribly empathetic of HIV+ individuals, but I could never be with one either. I'll spare my reasoning, but it is not an act of judgement. Its alright to feel bad for him, but dont feel like a horrid person. You're certainly not (*hug*).

 

I could never date someone with an STI STD HIV anything I'm
A virgin and I want my bf to also be a virgin to be safe

 

If the person told me before we had sex, I wouldn't have a problem dating someone that has an STD. I wouldn't have an issue because it doesn't change who they are as a person and I'm not willing to throw away a shot at love over an STD. I would never have casual sex with someone that is positive for anything though. Also, in case anyone is wondering, I do not and have never had any type of STD

 

Absolutely not.

 

No way. Unnecessary risk.

 

No I couldn't even if the guy was really nice and hot I don't want to catch anything like that I'd feel sorry for him but there is really no excuse for not wearing a condom especially if you aren't sure if the other guy is clean or not.

 

I personally don't think I could, but not really sure.

I will say though, unless you plan on testing every single person you meet before you start dating, then there is no way you can say that you will never date an HIV+ man. What you are really saying is that you will never date an HIV+ man, but you also don't have any problem dating them while you aren't sure about their status.

For many people, the guy you are talking to right now could possibly have HIV and they wouldn't even know it. Will you start dating them before getting tested? Will you still kiss before getting tested together? Will you even ask for their status before you start talking?

I don't think you are a horrible person and I don't think you were super insensitive, but we also have to realize that our fear is also a bit irrational. Real, but its irrational. If we know that wearing condoms will prevent you from getting HIV, then what's the risk?

 

It's a normal response, but it's a pretty unfortunate response, in my opinion.

I find it quite surprising that we trust safer sex practices when we're dealing with people and we have no idea whether or not they are even aware of their status or outright lying about it, but when someone's actually honest, our faith in safer sex goes away...

I'm gonna freaking bottom for an HIV+ guy just to be able to say I did.

 

I couldn't to be honest the relationship wouldn't be enjoyable for the both of us i would be worried to death about catching hiv. I can't put my life in risk over a little condom that could break

 

Just bear with him, cause his going through a really hard time.


Well i can consider having a relationship to person who's infected to HIV but it will be a non-sexual relationship, i think he can understand me from that, if ever i dated someone whos infected.

 

I’m sorry but I couldn’t.

 

It's a normal, but ultimately irrational response. You can't get HIV just from kissing someone.
I understand why people might be hesitant to date HIV positive people, but I'd say give it a shot.

*Edit. Of course always be safe and if necesarry avoid sex, if you can.

 

I would.

I am nearing my thirties, and though I have a girlfriend, I am not sure I love her in the "rest of my life" type of way. But if I ever met someone who it clicked with, and I fell in love, getting that feeling that it could be a for life thing, then HIV wouldn`t stop me. It is not transferable through kissing, unless you have a mouth sore. So being careful is important, but it`s not such a terrible risk to me. Life is a risk in any case, and I would rather live with love than without it.

That said, I don`t think you did anything wrong. Like someone else said, you could have been a little more delicate in your response, but it`s never easy to know what to say in these situations, so he should not have blown up on you. He was probably frustrated, because he is doing the right thing by being open about it (some are not) and yet it always blows up in his face. I can get that. But I also understand you, so all in all I think this was one of those situations with no winners, just hurt on both sides. It happens.