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clingyness/cuddles

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by musicgeek13, Feb 1, 2013.

  1. musicgeek13

    musicgeek13 Guest

    I was just wondering how everyone feels about being clingy. Are you? Do you mind it when others are?
    For me, I am not very clingy but I don't mind it when others are. I even enjoy cuddling or whatever with some people but I am never the one to initiate physical contact.
     
  2. BoiGeorge

    BoiGeorge Guest

    Im quite clingy and i like it when the girl im with is quite clingy too. But not obsessively!
     
  3. HadesReborn

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    I think it is unfortunate that we live in a time where we feel the need to reduce how we show love in a relationship. Heterosexual couples can hold hands and/or hug and no-one really cares but everyone looks at the gay couple. For a long time I was uneasy with PDA and wouldn't hold hands, kiss, cuddle, do anything. Then i realized I could stand up for myself and I didn't care what the person that i would never see again in my life thought about me and i started being a 'normal' person in a relationship. BUT, i think it is all about the comfort of BOTH people in the relationship to how much you can show. I'm a lover. I like to say I have the same outlook on life as Ewan Mcgregor in Moulin Rouge you know...

    [​IMG]

    But, i'm only ever "clingy", to use your word, if i am in a relationship with that person. Apart from that i never feel the need/desire to do anything like that. In short... I like to hug/cuddle haha. :slight_smile:
     
  4. Minx

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    I feel the same :3 I really can't stand when people are in my personal space, but a few slip through and it feels comforting to let them.

    I rarely initiate :3 which I try to work on. :grin:
     
  5. Oddish

    Oddish Guest

    I think I'm quite clingy but not obsessive. I like hugging my friends, and I like cuddling, and I usually initiate both. :grin: I'd like for my girlfriend to be the same.
     
  6. in a relationship clingyness is an instant turn off because to me it shows they are insecure, i need my own space.

    friendship is different because i havent encountered any clingy friends aha. we all have our own lives now, so we cant be like we were 15 again and like see each other 24/7 at weekends and always text 24/7 and things (like being 14/15 we used to).

    that being said though i guess i am not clingy, but affectionate when i see my friends.
    i link arms with my friends and hug them hello/goodbye and hold hands with a few. im not weird honest its a mutual friendy thing :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
  7. Minx

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    "All you need is love."

    "A girl has got to eat."

    "All you need is love."

    "Or she'll end up on the street."

    "All you need is lo-oo-ve."

    "Love is just a game."

    Dammit, Hades! >…< :lol:
     
  8. ForceAndVerve

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    Pretty much the same.

    Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't mind them being "handsie" when we are together. But constantly doing it and not knowing when enough is enough would just annoy me.

    I am always careful not to overstep things with friends etc. I can always tell when its time to stop and give it a break.
     
  9. Sartoris

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    Short answer: No.

    Long answer: I've kind of a had a fear of coming across as "clingy," just 'cause my social development seems to have gotten stuck in 'high school mode' when most people I knew were still immature and seemed kind flaky even towards their friends [or maybe this was just me?] Thus I've imagined that being to affectionate towards or fond of others will be a turn off to them.

    So I think I have the capacity to be open and affectionate towards people I'd want to be or would consider good friends, but I'm unused to it and just get anxious and self-conscious whenever the possibility sprouts up.

    Social Awkwardness FTW...
     
  10. leer

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    I dont mind either but to much is a warning that they are feeling insecure
     
  11. FruitFly

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    I'm not a physically affectionate person, nor do I need a lot of "I love you" talk. For me it's nothing to do with restricting my expressions of love due to being in a relationship with another woman, I'm just not that sort of person. Honestly, when someone is all over me with the touching and the feeling I get a little irritable. I'm very sensitive to touch, and if someone is constantly touching me I get overstimulated, and when I'm overstimulated I need them to love my from a minimum distance of 30cm.

    I'll kiss whoever I'm with in public regardless of where we are, hold hands, hug, giggle like lovebirds and all of that. But I need it to be in small doses, not constant touch, I end up feeling like they want to crawl under my skin and it just really irritates me. I can tolerate it up to a point, but anyone who is over the top touchy feely (or anything beyond my touch tolerance...) is a no go. It just doesn't work. They feel rejected because I do not want to spend all of our seconds together touching, I feel smothered because it's an effort to get them to leave me alone for 10 minutes.

    The same goes for clingy friends. I've cut them off quicker than the red fox jumped over the lazy brown dog.
     
  12. ForceAndVerve

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    This just reminded me of this.
     
  13. prism

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    I'm not clingy at all, physically or mentally. In fact, my friends would tell you that my worst quality is never responding/disappearing for days and sometimes weeks at a time. Also, I don't hug unless I feel that it would be even more uncomfortable to not hug. =_=

    In a relationship, I would prefer to be with someone who was independent and could still do their own thing when I'm busy. I don't know how I would act with physical contact, as I have only been in hetero relationships and thus very distant.
     
  14. LouisKat

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    hmm. It is one thing to be touchy when one is around another person and wanting to hold or be held often. It is something else to be clingy in the sense that the person is possessive and needs to know where the other is at all times or to be with them at all times. I can take the first kind, to a degree. I cannot handle the second kind at all.

    Lately, desire affection more than what is normal for me- and normal for me is no affection needed whatsoever. I guess, by most standards, right now, I am not clingy or touchy at all. By my normal baseline, I am strangely affectionate/touchy at the moment.
     
  15. OMGWTFBBQ

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    Yeah, l kinda have to agree with above posters. l do love to cuddle but clingyness is a separate thing.

    l have a really hard time being attracted to someone who seems too into me >.>
     
  16. Rivers

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    I love cuddling, but I avoid being clingy. I've always found clingy people undesirable.
     
  17. June Cleaver

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    I am not a clingy person at all. I learned adult men do not respond well to a clingy/ touchy feely type. Yes there is a time for touch, but not all the time, and not to micro-manage his time. I feel you have to give the person space to be themselves to have a happy relationship and that won't happen if they are being smothered. Now most of you guys on here are young and it feels natrul to you to cling on tight. Just my opinion on this. June
     
  18. Cthulhu

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    I don't mind cuddles.
     
  19. Divopix

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    I like both! Not too clingy though.
     
  20. HadesReborn

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    So... I think we should get married.