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Opposites attract....... BUT..... I need him/her to like this also....

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Alexander69, Feb 3, 2013.

  1. Alexander69

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    Ok so ya as the title says I've always heard people say "opposites attract" well I don't feel that I could date a guy messy, dirty, smelly, lazy, unhealthy, hates animals like I couldn't date someone opposite to me I need a guy similar to me. Now for others who feel that opposites attract then here is my question as my title says opposites attract... BUT... he/she must also like/do this or it's never going to work.and what would be a deal breaker like an absolute never going to ever happen I could never deal/handle that.
     
  2. SmokeandMirrors

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    Too funny :lol: When I think of a guy I want to meet I'd love for them to share the same interests so that we can do all the things we enjoy together.
    ...then again I guess that's what I desire. Maybe it can be good for interests to be slightly out so that you can experience new things from each other. Although if he was a football obsessive then I'd probably have to pass up on it.

    Still.....smelly, dirty and lazy are big no no's!
     
  3. robclem21

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    I think the idea of opposites attracting is important with some things and not so important with others. The idea of opposites attracting reflects balance in a relationship, not so much being completely opposite about every little detail.

    It is important to have things in common with others you get along with, whether that be friends or a relationship. Having things in common makes it easy to spend enjoyable time together. You have similar hobbies, likes and dislikes, and therefore are able to spend time together without one person always feeling the need to compromise.

    However, having too much in common can be boring, monotonous and even bad in some cases. For example, I know of many relationships where both people were almost too similar. Both very needy, both very high stress, and there was no balance in the relationship. It led to a lot of fights and situations that escalated with no reason in particular. I know a lot of very good relationships where both people were fundamentally different. One very high stress, one very laid back and relaxed. One who likes to go out a lot and one who likes to stay in. etc...

    These differences are really important. They push you outside of your comfort zone a little bit and bring a lot of balance to a relationship. Someone who is calm will help those who are high stress and energetic relax, and the energetic ones will get the quiet "stay-at-home" type out and about. If people are too different it won't work for various reasons, but opposites provide good balance and I think thats an aspect that is very necessary to have a successful relationship.
     
  4. Ticklish Fish

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    there's like attract like and opposites attract XD
     
  5. Lewis

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    I agree with some aspects of that, but I also couldn't date someone just like me. I'm too hygienic at the point of OCD. I need someone that's a little more relaxed! :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
  6. Rivers

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    I a girl to balance out my weak points (arrogance, irritability, pessimism), but if we had absolutely nothing in common, I doubt that it would work out.
     
  7. MichaelB

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    think you need a balance between the theory of opposites attract and dating someone similar to you.

    If you don't share ANY common grounds, then it'd be a problem and an obvious case where opposite attracts doesn't hold any ground. But if you do have some common interests, but the differences are more subtle (introvert and extrovert paired up for example), then I can see how opposites attract.
     
  8. MerBear

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    Me and My ex were almost complete opposites but we didn't work.
    she was too scared and i was too forceful
     
  9. Chip

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    I've seen a number of successful long-term relationships where there were some pretty fundamental differences in views on some things... but there was always plenty of compatibility that made the relationship work.

    For me, kindness, honesty, and integrity would be the the absolute must-haves. Non-smoker/druggie/drinker would be almost as important. Most everything else is up for discussion.