How fast did your love life proceed as a gay person? So, being 16 to me it seems like new things should be happening to me everyday romantically. It seems though that I've just stuck on these thoughts ever since eighth grade though, when I had my first kiss. I mean don't get me wrong I don't want to lose my virginity, or anything like that yet, but I just really wish I could at least get a boyfriend. I see straight coupes in my school all the time, and just wish I could have that at this same age. I guess what I'm trying to ask, is does the romantic life of a gay person move slower, because of the whole coming out process? Also how old were you when you had your first relationship, had your first real kiss, and lost your virginity? I just really want to know if I'm acting normal or irrational. Thanks
I think sometimes it takes more time when you're gay, yeah. And that is often because of coming out--you're right on with that idea. It's hat to come out and then you have to find someone else who's out and as you get older, more people are comin out and it's easier to connect. Straight people don't have to do that, they never had to come to accept themselves as straight and other people just assume they are. That's straight privilege. So, maybe you'll meet someone soon or maybe it will have to wait. The only thing you can do is be out, try and engage with a group of people who are also gay and maybe you'll meet someone. LGBT groups an clubs are your best bet if you're in school, but, failing that, I don't know what to tell you except that being out attracts more people who are also gay because you already have something in common.
You're not being irrational at all. It's normal to feel this way; it's how I did and still would If it weren't for the complete sheer luck that led me to meet my current boyfriend, and he's not even in high school himself! High school isn't a good place for gay romance for all the reasons you can imagine, including the coming out process. Most gays in high school aren't ready to come out yet, and the ones that are usually aren't ready to have a gay relationship, especially not in the prying eyes of high school. I have not had a single romantic encounter with a guy before or since being with my boyfriend. From what I understand, most people come out in college, and that's when the romantic life can really begin for us.
I think it's different for each person. I lost my virginity at 13, had my first relationship and kiss at 17, I was engaged at 19, dated around from 21-22. Now, I'm happily single at 23. :lol: At 16 I never thought I'd ever find anyone, then life just smacks ya randomly. x_x
I know the feeling of watching everyone living what you want romance-wise, but I don't think you should let it bother you too much. My personal experience has been slow. 22 and still holding onto my v-card and no romantic interest in sight. But then again, I'm not really out so how can I find someone when I don't put myself out there? You on the other hand are out so there are more possibilities. And like everyone else, i don't think you're being irrational.
Re: How fast did your love life proceed as a gay person? I'm not sure I should answer your questions by giving my own life statistics, as it may discourage you. On the other hand what I can say is that where you live and what type of people are around you makes the whole difference in which opportunities you've got. Also, your attitude towards said opportunities makes the whole difference! As in, if you've got plenty of open minded people around you, LGBT communities and out people, you have more opportunities. And if you're outgoing, love life and you dare to go talk to people, you'll catch on the opportunities. For me, I've had luck on my side so my "gay" love life started early (I was considered a lesbian then...was not out as trans) around 10 years old for love life, 12 years old for sex life.
