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How do you know if you're bottom or top?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Theagonist, Feb 18, 2013.

  1. Theagonist

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    I've never had sex, or even kissed a guy for that matter. Almost every fantasy I've ever had I'm always on bottom. I have put things up in there before, and I really like it, but it kind of gets boring and I can't get off by just doing that I need to wank too. I prefer to be submissive too, actually there's this SUPER sexy guy I know whom I met at homecoming, he went with this girl I know, and he's obviously gay, and his facebook confirms it (he's a freshman in college lol), and he likes my stuff a lot on Facebook, and I'm kind of interested in him, but I'm scared he would be submissive too




    Also I'm scarred if I top I wouldn't know what to do, and it would be awkward and bad lol
     
  2. worriedWardrobe

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    You sound like a bottom, to me
     
  3. Minx

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    I don't think sexual roles are that rigid.

    One of my best friend's was a bottom, until he met someone special, then he was vers, now he's a top. :slight_smile:

    It probably varies on who you'll be with and what they like.
     
  4. jaysuss

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    I think you may seem like you want to be a bottom but you don't know until you have tried both sides of it. I personally am a bottom by far so I think you will figure out yourself once you finally experience that carnal bliss we all look for.
     
  5. AKTodd

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    Try it both ways and see which way you like best.

    Even if you like one way better, you may still end up doing the other sometimes because the person you are with wants to or you want to.

    Not all guys can orgasm as a result of bottoming. For some it is just something that is part of the overall process.
     
  6. remainnameless

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    I swear you have the most intriguing threads :lol:
     
  7. Theagonist

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    Thank you haha:kiss:
     
  8. Pret Allez

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    Your fantasies will give the best indication, but there's no need to place a lot of stock in roles like that. It's mostly only for hookup sites that people are concerned about stuff like that, and it's only if you would never, ever want to top that you should identify as a bottom.

    I think you are predominantly a bottom, but I can't imagine (and don't want to imagine--I think that would sad :frowning2:) that you're exclusively a bottom. I hate to disappoint, but I've found that it's actually the bottom who needs to know more about what he or she needs to do than the top. The top just has to be erect, understand how to put on a condom, and have the patience and respect not to hurt the bottom.

    The bottom on the other hand has to understand how to let the top in. And I have failed at that twice.
     
  9. ForceAndVerve

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    Well if you constantly picture yourself as a bottom when you fantasize then that confirms your preferred position. But like the other's said, it's not set in stone, I bet you'd be up for anything if the right guy came along. :icon_wink

    Also I think you'll find it's hard to "finish" without wanking. I have read...ummm...stories[?] where guys tell of how they have managed to finish just by their partner hitting their prostate correctly. But I don't think that's really common. Not that I'm an expert. :lol:
     
  10. leer

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    at first I thought i would be bottom ''thought turned me on more I guess'' & like OP I liked the idea of being taken as I wanked myself off. but I was a bit curious wanted to at least give it a go. my first time I was the top didnt do to bad ''am not braging honest'' and it was few months after that i got to be bottom ''bit uncomfortable at first'' but we got there.
    I kind of liked both which makes me a versatile guy .
     
  11. FemCasanova

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    First, you still are pretty inexperienced, sometimes we know straight away what we like, sometimes we accidentally find out. Also, I know a lot of people aren`t either or, but can switch back and forth between the roles, depending on their mood, who they are with, etc. So, I wouldn`t worry too much about it, if I were you. You`ll figure out what you prefer when you`ve experimented a little :wink:
     
  12. AsIUsedToBe

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    Does it really matter? you can be ether one at anytime. :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
  13. stuffiscool

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    I thought I was a top/dominant until I had a girlfriend. Then I realized I have strong desires to be a bottom/submissive. :slight_smile:
     
  14. Abraxas

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    God made me a bottom.
    Amen. ;x
     
  15. yidnah87

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    I don't think that you would really know what role you are until you start having sex. Once that happens, see where it leads. It's normal to worry about sex if you're a virgin. Many guys are some degree of versatile, though may "lean" one way or the other.
     
  16. CptnBeefheart

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    Your fantasies usually give it away, although you might like both if you try it. To be honest, concerning men, I'm exclusively a bottom and I've never been aroused by the thought of topping a guy. With girls I suppose I'm more versatile
     
  17. AaronG

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    stereotypically you seem like an exclusive bottom. Since you seem to prefer being sexually submissive I would say you would enjoy bottoming more than topping.
     
  18. I doubt it matters. Probably a bigger deal once you find someone you want to have sex with.
     
  19. GingerGuy

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    I don't think you can say what you like without having tried both sides before. And don't limit yourself even before you start having sex. If gay men did not care if they bottomed or topped before meeting someone online, hook ups could be way more interesting, I think. I haven't have sex yet (soon going mad from abstinence), but I've decided to do both of them when the time comes. And well, when you are naked on a bed with a hot guy, I'm sure it will be your instincts and not your reason that will guide you ;-)
     
  20. Dublin Boy

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    I haven't had sex with another guy yet, so I am not sure what I would be :slight_smile: