I was chatting to a girl on the net last night-well I say chatting, there was a few preliminary greetings, then she launched straight in with, 'I like big breasted women, so basically I wanna come and play with your boobs.' Which is fair dos, honesty is important. So I was trying to extract a bit more information about her. Anyway,, I was considdering it like...as ya do. Then she sent me a picture..............No! Oh my god no. She looked like a bloke, I mean it was definitely a bird, but she looked like a bloke. I want a woman, not a man with a vagina.
not sure what you want us to reply with? not trying to be mean but be careful with your choice of words on this forum about gender and things. not sure how old you are either but if someone spoke to me like that online i would instantly know they were just after cyber fun or something like that. or failing that a troll.
To each his (or her) own. My partner is a very masculine-looking woman, not because I am desperate, but because that's what I like. If that's not your preference, it's not your preference, but there's no need to be insulting.
Fair enough, I take your point. I respectfully withdraw my post...well if I can I will anyway. ---------- Post added 19th Feb 2013 at 07:26 AM ---------- I can't find a delete button, so I appologise. I didn't think and I'm sorry. I meant no offence to anyone, but I can see how it could be taken as offensive and I just didn't think. So again, sorry.
I have asked for someone to remove the thread OP you really should have considered who was going to read this .
You can't delete posts because it would make it too easy for people to circumvent our security policy about not sharing personal info on public areas of the site. We can remove the thread if you want (if you want something removed, post in Ask the Staff and link to what you want removed, and we can do it) but mostly it's better to just address issues when they come up. You are not the first person to respond this way to butches. Personally, I don't think they look like men at all (they are sooooo much sexier, I am almost always really shocked that anyone could be confused). Of course, transmen often are men with vaginas, indefinitely, and there isn't anything wrong with that, either. Even if it's not for you. But I personally would have been kind of put off by the whole "we are barely starting to chat and I'm gonna say I want to play with your boobs" thing. Unless it was that kind of site--actually, based on your response, I'm gonna assume it was. So, I guess no problem there either. I hope you weren't cruel in cutting it off. You don't have to be interested, but people are horrible to butches all the time, and they really don't need it from other queer people. That's just how they are (and I love them and think it's awesome). If you aren't attracted to someone, just say "I'm sorry, I'm not interested." But please, don't act like they are beneath you and their interest in you is somehow an insult. How was she supposed to know you wouldn't be attracted to her? It's good that you can recognize how what you were saying was hurtful when it's pointed out to you, and it's brave to admit you were wrong and apologize. Thank you for doing that. It's very common for people who are still in the midst of the coming out process to be kind of uncomfortable around more obviously queer people. It's a reflection of them being uncomfortable with themselves as queer people. So, there may be some of that going on, too. Just recognize that being uncomfortable like that is about you, not about them. As you are more comfortable with yourself, you will be more comfortable with them, even if you still aren't attracted to them.
I don't think it would be inappropriate to start a convo off with "Femme interested in femmes", which I assume is what you are. Everyone has their types. Mine would say "femme interested in butches", soo...
