Hey everybody! ~<3 So I've been having a really hard time falling out of love with this girl (I'm sure you guys have heard all about it since I won't stop talking about it lol) and I'm beginning to wonder if something is wrong with me because it's been 4 months already!!! How long did it take for you guys to grieve a romantic relationship or feeling until you could finally "move on?" Or if you haven't had a romantic loss, how long did it take you to reach acceptance from another loss?
I was in a relationship that ended abruptly and without ever getting a good reason as to why. I suffered for two years thinking everyday about this person. I finally talked to a councilor and wished I had done it a lot sooner. I am now able to move on and look for true love this time.
it took me almost three years. i know that sounds insane lol but i just cant let go easily even after the shite i was put through when we broke up and after we broke up i just couldnt move on. we were together a year, i was 18 nearly 19 when we broke up and im 21 only just now. everyone is different of course though, some people move on in weeks, some months, some days, some years. you just have to give yourself time and i think it also depends on how much/what that person meant to you. i tried to date 6 months after but it didnt work, i was honest with the girl though. then i tried again a year after that. that didnt work either although i really liked her, i just kept comparing her to my ex (in my head) and then i knew i couldnt be in a new relationship even though i felt ready but obviously wasnt. i tried to move on but it wasnt working, then after 3 years of being single and working on myself inside, im fine take as much time as you need. the more you try to get over someone the harder it is. trying to run away from the feelings is hard, you have to face them and it is hard and horrible, but its just part of the process.
How long were you guys together? ---------- Post added 21st Feb 2013 at 10:33 AM ---------- Thank you for this.
I've mentioned before, but I was in love with my abusive ex-fianceè. After I broke it off it took at least a year for me to truly move on. I think when you've really cared about the person, it takes awhile to adjust. Regardless if it ended badly or amicably.
Yeah, I would agree that maybe you should seek out a therapist or counsellor to talk with about your grieving. I've felt like that over lost friendships and missed opportunities for years, but once I started speaking about it and not holding it all in, I felt so much better. I was able to put it behind me (for the most part, I'm still working on it), and continue on with life. I don't think there's a set time for "too long".. but when it starts to affect your life negatively, for months, years, ect. and constantly lingers your mind and brings you down, I would say that it's time to seek out help. Which is perfectly okay! Or maybe those feelings will subside eventually, as time continues on. I wish you the best and hope that you can move on and feel better soon enough.
Yeah because we are still "friends" and I wish I could be angry at her but I can't because she did nothing wrong. We were best friends not dating, but we acted like we were and it was the closest thing I've had to a "real" relationship. Thank you! My therapist just focuses on me getting out and meeting new girls but I'm still not over the other girl...
You say you're still friends? If its right after a heartbreak, it's easier to get past these feelings with distance as well as time. You might want to get some space. And maybe that's what your therapist is trying to do. By going out and meeting other people, you are finding emotional space. You might find more friends to share yourself with and then you'll be relying on your ex/friend for less emotional support. It's pretty hard to move on when the object of your feelings is still right there and is still the person you rely on most emotionally.
Yeah we don't talk nearly as much because we were inseparable before... I can't talk to her as much but we still chat from time to time.
Awww I'm sorry your still having a hard time over all that :/ Everyone seems to be giving good advice though, I agree that you just need to find new friendships so you can move on, since this old friendship doesn't seem to be going anywhere (*hug*) ---------- Post added 21st Feb 2013 at 03:38 PM ---------- And honestly, I have gotten over my "relationship" but it still pops back into my head nearly everyday. I think it is because, like you mentioned, because it is the closest to a "real" romantic relationship I have gotten.
