So my first boyfriend dumped me this morning, he meant the world to me and right now I'm just so confused. We had been dating for about a year and 3 months, I had done things for him that I never would have for other guys, I've changed a lot being with him and now its just over, just like that. I've been crying for most of the day and I've been on the verge of cutting as well, I don't know what to do, I'm not sure if I'm supposed to be fighting to get him back or if I should just move on now. I love him, I don't want to get over him. I just don't know what to do. I feel so lost right now and don't really have anyone to talk to that I feel like I can truly talk to about what we had done together... I was at least hoping we could have met before we broke up... His main reason for dumping me was because we were 4 years apart and because of our currant age that technically could have him put in jail (I'm 15 and he is turning 19), but one of the other reason he mentioned was that he wanted to party and not have to worry about the consequences because he had a girlfriend... He claimed I wasn't holding him back but that's exactly what it sounded like... I was oddly calm about the whole thing, I didn't seem desperate or anything, I just told him that it was his choice and I won't stop him... He told me he was sorry and said that we could still talk if I want, I told him that I would need some time to get over him before I could do that... I'm so scared that one day I'm going to run to him crying because someone has hurt me by instinct and find out he has someone else... I'm just not ready yo lose him right now.... He was always my reason to smile, I could always think of him when I was sad and everything would be okay... Just days ago he was claiming everything would be okay because we were together and than he just drops this on me today... Sorry about ranting, I just needed to get this all out...
