So how long do you guys think you should wait before trying to date again? I have been single for about 4 days now but already I want to try get a new boyfriend to try help me move on from the last but saying that I'm wondering if I will be able to date again anytime soon because this break up hit me hard and I'm kind of hoping he will change his mind..... Any similar situations?
If you feel like you're dating to get over someone else then it's too soon. If you want to date someone, you need to focus on them, not secretly find yourself comparing them to your ex that you still love or swoon over. The time for grieving can last quite awhile. Why did you two break up? I'm going through something similar. It's been about 4 and a half months and I'm still grieving over my best friend. It sometimes takes awhile and I know I'm not ready to date again yet. Good question though as I have pondered this myself lately. I will be interested to hear what others say~<3
We mainly broke up because of age difference, he is 19 and I'm 15. He was at a different place in his life and had plans for the future and he didn't want to risk that because he was dating someone underage. I was really calm about the whole break up but I've been crying all the time and can't stop thinking about him, I truly love him and still can't believe its over. We were dating for a bit over a year and hje has helped me so much. I'm dying to try talk to him again but I'm scared that i will seem weak if I go back to him so soon.
I think he might have made the right choice, considering you are under-age, and he actually could get in serious trouble for dating you, as terrible as that sound. Try to take a little comfort in that, even though I totally understand that this is tough for you! *hugs!* Maybe the two of you get another chance later, maybe not, but I think it`s too soon yet, as you definitely sound not over him. It`s never a good idea to move on to the next, before you`ve worked through the previous relationship. It can complicate and sabotage your next relationship like you wouldn`t believe. I am really sorry, but you`ll feel better in some time *hugs!*
If you haven't fixed or haven't come up with a way to fix the problems that broke you up in the first place, you shouldn't go back, even though it's really hard (*hug*)
I actually find myself in disagreement with the majority of posters so far. I don't see any useful purpose sitting around and pining over him. I'm not saying you should go out there and try to find a guy to "replace" him. I *AM* saying you should go out there and try and meet new people. Focus on making friends, and be honest about just coming out of a relationship. If you meet someone along the way, and you both are interested in each other - awesome. If not, that's okay too. I think surrounding yourself with friends at this time is helpful. The alternative is sitting around crying or moping, and wondering if he's going to text you or if it's okay if you text him... wondering if you can still be friends, and hoping that maybe he'll change his mind. The best way to get over someone, IMO, is to get out there and fill your life with people and other things. Look for things to do to keep yourself busy and make friends along the way. The only thing you want to avoid is using someone to "replace" him. However, if you meet someone along the way and you both are interested in something more than friendship, just be open and honest about where you've been recently. Things will get better, I promise. (*hug*)
it's hard to say, it's different for everyone. The fact that you're asking might be sign that you're not ready. it'll feel right when it's time.
A month is generally a good estimate to start looking once more. It gives time to clear out emails, mementos, etc. But, I do know a few people who bounce from one relationship to another without much wait at all.
Thanks for all the advice guys Truthfully I completely understand whyy he chose to break up with me and I have no problem with him being dumping me, my main problem is me not being with him if that makes sense, I relied on him a lot and he was always the one who would make me happy and makes things okay. I find my friends to really not help be when I need someone to talk to and because of my mood swings a lot of my friends leave me, and I've never really been good at making friends, I'm a fairly antisocial person. But its already starting to get a little easier, but after this I have learned that dating long distance will only ever hurt me So at least I got something good out of this relationship
You should not date someone because you think you should date someone, or because it would make you feel better to date someone. You should date someone because you met a person that happened to make you feel safe, happy, and attractive. Essentially, the best relationships come out of ones that you stumbled upon without searching for them. The problem with looking for someone to date, is that you tend to ignore differences or imagine chemistry where there is none. There's nothing wrong with having an open mind and trying to meet people, but I'd reccomend starting with the premise of finding new friends. It's best to start slow after a breakup, you don't want to jump right into a relationship for the sake of it. Which brings me to my next point, the fact that you feel the need to date someone is not healthy. It suggests self-esteem or dependency issues; you feel like you need a person in your life for stability, that you're lost, or imperfect without someone. I would instead focus on strengthening your friendships rather than finding a new partner, especially since there's people who would take advantage of your current state and use you.
