Ok so my manager is gay anyways he is married.... Anyways he's been married like 6 months and he stared hiting on me a little today telling me how sexy I was looking he was touching my shoulders and whispered good job baby..... I didn't say anything and I tried as hard as I could to not flirt back but like honestly HE'S MARIED! I ain't no home wrecker here so what can I do nicely to be like I'm not interested YOU'RE MARRIED! You FOOL! LOL
Just don't encourage his behavior (you say you try not to flirt with him - just do, there is no try). If he persists in touching you inappropriately or saying suggestive things, give him frigid cold body language until he stops. Or tell him flat out you're not interested if it comes to that point. Seriously, it's that easy. He can't continue to flirt with you as a manager unless you flirt back without getting himself in trouble for sexual harassment. It might be an awkward conversation, but not nearly as awkward as letting this situation play out.
Seems you have pretty strong morals. Good for you. However, if you didn't, you could really work this to your advantage.
I wouldn't entertain this behavior, if I were in your position. If it gets out that you two are having a thing, it'll be a whole bunch of drama that could've easily been avoided. If he compliments you on your looks, just say "thank you" and go about your job. But even regardless of whether or not people find out about this, it's just a morality thing for me. I would feel so awkward and wrong for having relations with someone who is married...
Sexual harassment is illegal, and that's what he's doing. I suggest simply making it clear, non-verbally at first, that you don't appreciate the way he's acting. Just pull away when he touches, ignore his comments. If that doesn't work, you could say "I'd appreciate it if we could keep all of our conversation on a professional level." If that still doesn't work, you could say "No offense, but I'm just not interested in personal comments when I'm at work." If none of that works, you may have to contact the district manager or the employee help line or something.
Is he married to a man or a woman? That, to me, brings light to the situation. If he's married to a woman ,then he's obviously a closet case who is looking for something. If he's married to a guy, he's just a stupid cheat. However, the best bet is to tell him to stop and say no. As others have said - when you say "I tried hard my hardest to not flirt back..." that makes me think you wanted to flirt with him, am I right? That complicates matters because it adds fuel to the fire. Soooo...just stick to the "you're married and you're my boss!" thing!
If he's married to a woman, he's still a stupid cheat (at least in this closet case's opinion). It doesn't make it any less of an infidelity whether this guy is closeted or not. He'd still be breaking a love vow.
Married to a man and a really nice man. Like his husband has a heart of gold like why he is trying to do stuff with me makes no sense. His husband is sexy to so. Idk I've lost a lot if respect for him. The next time he makes a move I'm going to say out right "YOU'RE MARRIED!" Becuase that should stop it I hope he can't get mad or try to het me in shit for being honest and not playing along with his cheating. If he does then I will report him
Ok so he was taking with me flirting with me today again so I just told him the truth isaid "look you are married, I'm not interested. I care for you as a friend and look up to you as my boss that's it that all there is ever going to be between us. I'm not going to be a home wrecker to you I'm not going to ruin your marriage." He sad "of I met you first I wouldn't have married him" I said have you heard of infatuation that's all you are feeling I said I'm not a nice person out side of work I said your husband is an amazing and caring guy I'm not, there are tons if other gay men here who will be happy to screw up your relationship, but I'm not of them I'm sorry but this has to stop ASAP" and he pretty much walked away
wow, that escalated quickly... but i wouldn't let the guards down yet... still keep an eye on that man @_@
i agree with ^^^ this could go to your advantage...im probably going to be hated but sometimes married people need a fling to strengthen their marriage... before i realized i was gay i slept with married women to make them feel good about themselves coz they're partners aint giving it to them...and last time i checked they're (only went with 3) all still married
Good for you, Alexander! Standing up for yourself and taking a stand, and you did so in a respectful way. Hopefully he takes the hint and that's the end of it. If not, you may have to take other steps. It really is so totally not ok for him to hit on you in the slightest way, that is clearly sexual harassment and could get him in a world of hurt if you were to take any action about it.
That did escalate quickly, but good for you Alexander! Maybe you can't change his behavior, but standing up for yourself and being clear on what your values are is a great thing.
Thank you guys and I wanted to end it before it became anything since other crew (coworkers) we noticing and thought we had a thing going on after Agee people asked and he hit on me again I was like this is stoping now. If he wasn't married or dating I would totally give him a try but he's married and cheating is something I can't STAND
