Well after coming out to myself 4 weeks ago & going through a period of calm, with a feeling of peace with myself, being able to say to myself "I am Gay", I now wonder what the next step is, I feel that I have to get used to the knowledge that I am Gay first before I even think of coming out of the closet to people more closer to me, some friends is ok at 1st, family is a more complex issue, but what do I do next in the interim, what do I do next? what did other people do after coming out to their self, I know some people start coming out to other people, but it's very much a Straight world that I am living in, I feel that I will know when it's the right time to Come out to more people, am I just being too cautious?
You can't throw caution to the wind, but I would think that you do have to step outside your comfort zone a little. It's critical to get out there and understand what the gay community is about. I don't know what town you are in...is there a gay world that is hidden like some parallel universe in your neck of the woods? I came out to myself at the same time as you, and I am eager to start my new life, but there are crushing obligations (instead of the obligatory crushes!) to deal with first. Courage! Get out there, and take that step to happiness!
Thanks mate, there is a Gay Scene in my nearest city, 30 miles away, I have been before when I was going through my questioning period, always on my own & always ending up drinking too much (to give myself confidence) Lol now that I know who I am now, it would probably be easier, is it possible to make friends with people in Gay Bars or are people only interested in one night stands?
I've never been to a gay bar in my life, but I have a funny feeling the main interest would be one night stands. For friends, what I guess would be best would be to find some group someplace that has a heavy population of gays, and has some interest that you have (other than sexuality). For example, in the US, we have US Masters Swimming (basically a swim team for adults). Some local chapters are heavily populated by gays. So a gay who is interested in swimming (even if he's only interested in getting a little exercise) might do well to join a gay Masters group.
