are you born gay/lesbian/bisexual?

[MatthewJS]

Me and former friend has been feuding about if you.are born LGBT or wanting to choose. Are you born with it or do you choose?

[GayLibertarian]

Born with it, and I can't imagine it any other way!

[Niko]

Well I know for a fact I didn't choose to be Trans* nor did I choose to like guys. It all happened naturally for me. So I say you're born with it.

[wonderingdave01]

I was born bisexual. How do you CHOOSE to like anything?

Ask your friend when s/he chose to be straight!

[BornInTexas]

You're born LGBTQ. You cannot just wake up and say, "I'm gay, today." That just doesn't happen.

[MatthewJS]

My female "wanting-to-be-bi" said its a choice when I keep telling her its not a choicE! She is so ignorant.

[thecat06]

I know that I was born being both pangender and gay. Looking back, I can see many times where I had attractions to women or I had gender dysphoria. I honestly don't know how I didn't figure myself out before I graduated high school.

[Ridiculous]

As everyone has said you don't choose your sexuality, but you do choose whether you're going to accept it or not, which can give other people the impression that you chose to become gay if you suddenly stop hiding yourself.

[Dublin Boy]

I was born Gay & I will die Gay, I am afraid I was just made that way (it's Innate)

[greatwhale]

I was born gay, but I didn't have a word for it until much, much later...

[Hiems]

Yup, to reiterate other posters, no logical person chooses to be gay or bisexual. I do not think that anyone would want to choose a path that involves stigmas and discrimination by virtue of your attraction - that's playing life on hard mode. Moreover, I doubt you can control who you are attracted to, but you CAN choose to live a lie by being with someone of the opposite gender to adhere to societal norms. Personally, I would rather live my life the way that it was meant to be by accepting the former.

Sidenote: There's some evidence that claims fraternal birth order affects your sexuality. Some studies state that the more brothers you have born before you, the more likely you'll be gay. And it may have to do with changes in the mother's immune system, affecting the gestation of subsequent male children. I think this applies to me, as I have 3 older brothers and one who was a stillborn. Yet I know that the findings don't apply to every LGBT person. So I don't feel like having to seek justification for my attraction - I am who I am. That's my soapbox.

[Ianthe]

Why does she want to be bisexual?

[Hopeful]

Originally Posted by Hiems

Sidenote: There's some evidence that claims fraternal birth order affects your sexuality. Some studies state that the more brothers you have born before you, the more likely you'll be gay. And it may have to do with changes in the mother's immune system, affecting the gestation of subsequent male children. I think this applies to me, as I have 3 older brothers and one who was a stillborn. Yet I know that the findings don't apply to every LGBT person. So I don't feel like having to seek justification for my attraction - I am who I am. That's my soapbox.

That's really interesting! What about with girls? Any sort of evidence with us??

[MatthewJS]

Originally Posted by Ianthe

Why does she want to be bisexual?

I don't know. She 'chose' to be bi. And she thinks I chose to be gay!

[musikk021]

Born with it, definitely. No doubt about it. This can't possibly be a choice, as my feelings have inherently been there all my life.

[Formality]

Like someone would choose to feel miserable and depressed. Like someone would choose to be a minority. Like someone would choose to be hated by half the world. No I didn't choose it.

[Hiems]

Originally Posted by Hopeful

That's really interesting! What about with girls? Any sort of evidence with us??

As far I as I have read, the fraternal birth order isn't associated with same-sex attractions in females. But that isn't to say that there isn't any biological evidence whatsoever. Plus, the fraternal birth order effect doesn't conclusively explains all same-sex attraction in males, as there are some who don't have older brothers, yet identify as gay.

So just to reiterate, I don't feel the need to justify attraction - it's just a part of you, me, and anyone else out there.

[Ianthe]

If she can be attracted to both males and females, she was bisexual to begin with.

Sometimes bisexuals are confused because they have a hard time believing that everyone doesn't have the same experience they do. They don't understand that gay people really are not attracted at all to the opposite sex, and straight people really are not attracted at all to the same sex. They think that everyone has the same feelings they do. But they are wrong.

(Other sexual orientations make similar mistakes, but they aren't really relevant here.)

[Tetraquark]

Well, it's not a choice, but I also don't think we are necessarily born LBGTQ either. Our orientation and gender most likely result from an interaction of inborn traits with our environment, including culture and life experiences. Natalie Reed recently wrote a piece about this issue from a trans* perspective that expresses a similar idea and that I highly recommend anyone read. I, for one, do not experience either my orientation or gender as being innate, though admittedly this could be a result of depression-induced dissociation.

[Formality]

Originally Posted by Hiems

Sidenote: There's some evidence that claims fraternal birth order affects your sexuality. Some studies state that the more brothers you have born before you, the more likely you'll be gay. And it may have to do with changes in the mother's immune system, affecting the gestation of subsequent male children. I think this applies to me, as I have 3 older brothers and one who was a stillborn. Yet I know that the findings don't apply to every LGBT person. So I don't feel like having to seek justification for my attraction - I am who I am. That's my soapbox.

This might be very true. I watched a documentary on tv and they said that if a mother has three boys the third boy will 90% likely be gay. I don't know though, it seems a bit too much, but it might just be true.

Anyways I have two older brothers and I am gay, so yea. I am pretty sure having older brothers can affect your sexuality.