Why Did You Join EC?

[Vampyrecat]

Okay, given Biisme's thread noted this, I thought I would go ahead and start this thread.

Why did you Join EC?
How has it made you feel about yourself? (by this I mean have you gained confidence? made friends? felt good about yourself? have you had a place to vent your feelings?)

I joined because I really wanted to meet other people like me. I live in a smalllllllll country town with a very small GLBT population, and I know every member of the community.
EC has made me feel a lot more confident about myself, and I'm a lot more comfortable with who I am as a person. God has made me this way, so why would He hate me for being gay?
It has been a good place for me to get my feelings out, I've made heaps of friends, and it's really just become a part of my life. I come home from school, and I come straight here.

Thanks for being here for me EC. I'm always here for you if you need someone to talk to, just pm me and I'll reply okay?

Okay, now its YOUR turn.

[Psychedelic Bookmarks]

I joined to talk to some people about sexuality, and feel like this part of me was something I could share with others. It's a place where I feel like I don't have to hide this and I can feel part of a community.

[Owen]

I joined so I could be part of a large, gay-filled and gay-friendly community. The GLBT community where I live is pretty nil, and being a part of EC has given me the confidence and pride that comes with being a part of a large community.

[Bromptonrocks]

I joined because my daughter's orientation on her Myspace showed "not sure". I was looking for advice to help me help her...turned out EC was good for me! Made lots of friends and have realised how diffilcult it still is for gays and lesbians inspite of gayness being more acceptable today. I admire the bravery and maturity shown by everybody.

For me it's great to be able to talk with like-minded people and makes me feel as if I belong.

As for my daughter, she's now got a boyfriend and changed her orientation to straight. I'll still be here for her if she's still unsure and I've got EC to thank for helping me to understand more even though I'm bi myself.

[CrimsonThunder]

We had a thread like this the last time "EC was going down hill".

I think that was just after the *** link too.

Anyway, I joined to GIVE support and it turned out I also use this site for support for myself with any issues that come about.

[davo-man]

Hmmm, to be honest I cannot remember the original reason for joining/staying with EC, prob just cos it gave me something to do, the stories of others interested me, occasionally I needed some advice, but I wasn't too confused about my sexuality so it wasn't really for me to get that clarified.

What I can tell you is why I stay here to this day and that is because the people and their stories interest me. I love the Fun and Games section because it's another one of those distractions from homework that school and uni students love, but also it give me a chance to socialise with people who are gay, like me. Also, I've met some really interesting people on here and I love talking to them because they have such different perspectives from me, for instance if they're at a completely different stage in their lives and in completely different countries. So really, it gives me a chance to learn about other cultures. For instance, I learnt the difference between UK, Great Britain, England, North Ireland, Wales and Scotland on here. I know it has absolutely nothing to do with sexuality, but I sstill found it interesting, and I only learnt it because this is an international community

Also, it's a great place to learn from people who have "been there, done that...." for instance, Divadarya's great post on transsexuality and all the great medical posts written by JayHew (rip)....So that's why I'm here.

Also, I have to do a report on online communities for uni, and found these two things that i found interesting, and slightly relevant to the thread:

Reasons For Joining An Online Community

Anticipated Reciprocity - Expecting people to respond to things you post eg getting support in the Support/Advice section
Increased Recognition - Being recognised for things that you post/rewarded eg getting compliments in the Post a Pic thread
Sense of efficacy - A sense that you have had an effect on the site, that you have helped the community eg Creating a great sticky thread
Sense of Community - A sense that you are part of a group of people eg making friends in the Chatroom

The Online Community Lifecycle

Peripheral (i.e. Lurker) – An outside, unstructured participation
Inbound (i.e. Novice) – Newcomer is invested in the community and heading towards full participation
Insider (i.e. Regular) – Full committed community participant
Boundary (i.e. Leader) – A leader, sustains membership participation and brokers interactions
Outbound (i.e. Elder) – Process of leaving the community due to new relationships, new positions, new outlooks

[Tim]

I was really feeling quite depressed, and was seeking some advice, where I stumbled across a link to EC on the Tyra Show website. I thought I'd at least check it out. After searching around for a few hours, the community seemed very nice, so I decided to post. Not long after posting, heatqueen began talking to me. Within a few hours, she had helped me so much it's not funny, and I had came out to someone I considered a second mom. Within another hour, her and heatqueen had convinced me to tell my mom (and everyone else who knows me, as my mom was the reason I wasn't telling anyone). After much thinking, I decided to do it online, and have the person I consider a second mom "notice" it to her, while I was sleeping to give her time to think so she didn't overreact, and it worked, she took it wonderfully.

This has made me so grateful to EC, and I try to help when possible, but some things I'm just not gonna be helpful with, so I don't tend to post in those, as otherwise it gets their hopes up and may just annoy people.

EC gives me a place to vent my feelings and people who respond to them, even if I don't like the response one day, I appreciate it the next, as EC actually tries, whereas other places I've seen do not. EC has helped my self confidence so much, however, there is still much work to be done, which I have no influence over, it is all up to my body.

I like meeting people on here who were in similar situations as I was, and just try to talk to them, as I know a lot of the time that's all I wanted. Even though most people might find it as a bad thing, EC has helped me cry again. I hadn't cried since my dad passed away, and it was not good for me. The first time I cried after that, I cried 3 days straight and couldn't stop. That was just after 5 years. If it had gone on longer, who knows how bad it could've been. I don't like crying, but at times, it just gives you the greatest feeling of relief, and although some people might say it makes you seem weak, I think it makes you seem strong, not afraid to do something normal.

EC does not judge you, which I love. I do consider myself quite overweight, and even though I know it isn't true (seriously, someone obese IS overweight XD), I still smile when I see people trying to help. Arn's avatar makes me smile everytime I see it, just had to add that, and as some of you know, I don't smile much anymore.

[davo-man]

...Forgot to put this in before:

Another point on the interesting people, is that there are probably a lot of people on here who don't know that I find there posts interesting, entertaining or that I think makes this place worth coming to (although it's everone's posts that makes this place coming to) eg Joeyconnick, Arna....Arnaneth....(bugga, I can never remember how to spell it)...Helena, CrimsonThunder, PirateNinja, Vampyrecat, Biisme (seriously, who doesn't feel appreciated by her posts)...but you know there's hell more that make great interesting posts and I've also never even talked to most of them personally

[Tim]

Originally Posted by davo-man

Biisme (seriously, who doesn't feel appreciated by her posts)

I don't think it's possible NOT to

[beckyg]

I came here out of curiousity at first and after reading some of the posts thought I could offer some help. I didn't expect to make such great friends. I love you guys!

[Davo]

I found this site after googling gay depressed "in the closet" or something, anyway, stumbled across EC. I really only expected to make one post to explain to someone how horrible I was feeling as I felt very isolated, I was surprised by the great responses I got, and the fact that there were other gay people out there. There's probably a gay community where I live but I'm unaware of it, so it's really great to have this site to turn to

EC has given me a bit more confidence about my sexuality, I'm no longer in denial, but I'm still struggling to apply it to the real world. I need to start posting more, I don't feel too involved mostly because I think most of my posts are stupid, although I would like to be able to give support to anyone needing it

[biisme]

I actually didn't originally join this site for support...I was skimming "coming out" stories online and i ended up in one of the threads. I tried to post a reply and I was refused! Well...I couldn't let that stop me. Soooo...I joined to answer a thread...and then I actually looked at EC!

But, I have found lots of support here and have made many friends, and this is the main reason I stay. That, and because I care about the people here.

[Wander]

I join a forum for every minority I belong to. I need a place to discuss various things without coming under fire from people who disagree, and this is one of those places for one of those issues.

[Miaplacidus]

A friend recommended me to see it, so I joined because of curiosity. At first I wasn't very active (EC wasn't very active back then to be honest), but after three or four months I began to really like it. I even canceled my membership in "the other forum" (ahem)...

[sdc91]

Well, first off, I have to say that even though I joined Nov. 2007, I had been lurking on and off around EC for probably about a year before that.

I finally got enough courage to join and I'm glad I did, because it's given me so much support. It's helped me realize that I'm not the "only one" and that there are other people out there like me.

I've made so many friends here, and sometimes I feel more comfortable with you guys than my friends in real life just because I'm not hiding anything.

[ErikPinkLovesU]

I joined to meet new people and to be able to talk about my sexuality. Without EC i proably wouldn't be half as sane as I am now. Thanks Pual and all the other Moderaters, Adminasters, and members who help make this community a haven for all. LOVE AND PEACE

I joined because i didn't really know how i felt (i still don't but its getting there) and because EC seemed to be the best place for me to open myself and listen to others in similar situations.

EC was also a release for me as i was very alone and i had no way to communicate or express my feelings.

[Byte]

I joined because I was looking for people who accepted me for who I was, and for people who are going through, or have been through what I'm going through right now, so that I can both give, and hopefully receive support.

Even though I don't really know any of you, and I am really new, I feel a connection to you all.

Yes... that sounds lame, I know.

[heatqueen]

Dubai's homophobic so this is one of the only places I can be myself. I was also really curious about everyone's coming out stories so I read them a lot, and I thought maybe I could help a few people out. After that, I sorta just got attached to EC et voila, I'm here and not going anywhere anytime soon!

[Lexington]

I've been posting on "that other site" for over a year now. I especially enjoy giving advice and support to other members. So much so, that I started getting PMs from some members saying "We could really use your advice on this thread", and other PMS asking for advice "in private". A few members suggested I come over to EC and do the same. I wasn't sure I wanted to. I wasn't sure if I would end up feeling like that creepy 40-year-old at the teen party. But it hasn't been that way at all.

Lex