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Horny for sons friends

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by sparky4196, Apr 19, 2013.

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  1. sparky4196

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    My 23 y/o son has friends come over. 1 of his friends is 21, I am a bi/m/and so want to do something with him. He had some friends over here 2nite, that were younger that he was, and I so would luv 2 do something with them, but I do not know how 2 try and approach any of them about it. Any1 give me some advice?
     
  2. LD579

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    Well... Don't do it?

    Do you know if the friend is into older people who are guys? Are you single right now? How would your son feel if he knew his dad messed around with one of his friends? (It could ruin their friendship)

    There's not enough information here for me to help you with your situation without erring on the side of caution. Even if you gave some more details, my answer likely would not change.

    I don't know how old you are, but with large age differences, there is an easy potential for power disparity. There are lots of reasons for that disparity, but honestly my brain is too fried to give all the examples. I'm sure you can come up with a few yourself.

    Lastly, think about this: how would you feel if you were 21 and you went over to a friend's house, and his dad came onto you / asked if you'd be interested in fooling around? Likely you'd feel some sort of pressure at the very least.
     
  3. partmin123

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    If you need help, we need ages. Yours and the friends so there are no illeglities in this situation. Second, we need to know if he has a taste for older men. Third, do you know if he is gay
    If none of these apply, don't go for it. Plus it would be a big no-no in any relationship, friend or other wise, for your friend to have sex with your dad. Just take it steady.
     
  4. Alexander69

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    If the guy is interested in you I would ask your son how he would feel of all is good I say go for it as long as they are over like 19 NOT minors lol
     
  5. prism

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    We need more context. Are you married to your son's mother? What would your son think about you hooking up with one of his friends? Is it worth ruining your relationship with your son?
     
  6. cassexy

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    well just because you like somebody you cannot have them, you have to find out their tastes and likes too, first talk, become comforatable and only if the other person shows interest in you, you can go ahead
     
  7. BradThePug

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    The advice that you recieved in your previous thread of the same topic still stands. I'm locking the thread because of this.
     
  8. Chip

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    I don't normally say things this strongly, but in this circumstance, it appears you posted on this topic before and got essentially the same answers but figured you'd ask again, hoping to get better ones, so I'll try and spell it out as clearly as I can.

    This is beyond fucked up.


    It is wrong on so many levels. Your son who is presumably half your age or more, has friends, and you somehow think that it is OK not only to befriend your son's friends, but to try to seduce them and have sex with them?

    Have you no boundaries at all?

    Imagine how your son is going to feel if his father is hitting on his friends. Imagine how your son's friends are going to feel if their friend's dad is hitting on them.

    The fact you're even thinking about this indicates there is a serious problem. The fact you're considering acting on it and trying to find a way to talk one of the guys into it shows that you have some really, really unhealthy boundaries.

    If you give a crap about your son and his emotional health, not to mention caring about his friends, you'll drop any inkling of an idea that this could remotely be considered a good idea. It isn't, and it is likely to have really, really bad ramifications for your relationship with your son, his relationship with his friends, and potentially, the friend's parents.

    I honestly can't believe a parent with an ounce of common sense would even consider this. You do know that half of the shit on Jerry Springer is completely made up and many of the stories the people tell haven't an ounce of truth to them, right?

    I would also strongly suggest seeing a therapist to talk about your feelings and discuss your understanding of boundaries, because if you're so willing to violate this boundary, you may unintentionally be violating all sorts of other boundaries for your son and any siblings he may have as well. You owe it to your family to really think about this.
     
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