*bangs head on monitor in frustration*

Oh wow... Are people really that stupid??? Wow....

 

*hands bandage for head*
*hands new monitor*

I'm sorry, that must suck. It is a really terrible reason, I agree. There are plenty of tall cis-women, and even if you're the tallest woman alive, which is unlikely, its completely unreasonable to misgender someone based on height.

The best thing to do is to have no idea what they're talking about.

(*hug*)

 

That is just awful. Good thing you actually said something about it. So at least she won't be so stupid a next time a tall female walks in.

 

Good on you for saying something to her, people can be so thoughtless!

 

Oh my thats soo stupid.People tend to hurry to put labels and call people things without even thinking twice.You GO girl!You did right to put things to their place.Im sure now she will think twice and thrice before she say something so stupid and nonsense!

 

Hahaha Yes!

 

Lol

 

lol, a wild derp appeared!...

 

wow, she had no idea and you made her feel like shit for it. it is really hard to tell sometimes you know, i accidentally opened the men's bathroom for a woman once and i felt bad enough, but if she would've yelled at me, i probably would've started crying right there at work.
I'm sorry I'm probably the only one that feels this way, but I had to say something.

 

Never call someone sir or ma'am if you work in retail or the food industry. On the rare occasion you mess it up the person that you did it to is going to take it personally. That's an awkward situation for you. She probably just wanted to get out of the situation and just said the first thing that came to her mind.

You don't want people to equate being tall with being a male but you equate being a fast food cashier with low wisdom. C'mon now. I'm sure you're just frustrated but you had a real opportunity to educate her on what it is to be transgender and you dropped the ball. Not trying to be mean but we can't just assume everybody understands what us of the LGBT community are going through. We have to educate people when the opportunities present themselves.

 

I see women well above 5'11" at school on a daily basis. There is no rule that states 'you must be this tall/short to be a man/woman'.

Is heightist even a word?

 

I'm sorry, but how hard is it to tell that its appropriate to call someone in a dress 'she' or 'ma'am'. Even if the OP wasn't passing, and by her own account she was, any sensitive person should see that its obvious she should have been called she. Also, it is a stupid reason, and if people are never told about stuff, how are they supposed to learn?

 

I agree with MetalAngel. Just because someone is wearing a dress doesn't mean that person's a girl. Now you're stereotyping. My friend wore dresses as a kid but always thought of himself as cisgender.
The woman made a simple mistake and the OP pretty much ruined her day by bullying her.
For the record, height is not a reason to immediately assume someone's sex, but it's a pretty good indicator. Probably, the woman thought OP looked masculine and was trying to cover her mistake with another reason to not upset OP.

 

It sounds like you are overreacting to something rather meaningless in your life. There are more important things to worry about than cashiers calling you sir at restaurants. The reason you were given for having been mistaken for a man was that you were tall. If she had said that you looked androgynous or had distinctive male features, then that would be one thing, but this is clearly an absurd judgement of genders, so it really isn't worth worrying about.

However, it begs the question, do you have male features that give people a reason to believe you are not a woman? The cashier may have just given you the "too tall" excuse because she didn't want to offend you by saying that you looked like a man.

 

I sympathize with you, but I will have to agree with MetalAngel89.

Most people have had their gender mistaken atleast once. I've had nearly fully shaved hair and light facial hair, and I was still mistaken for a women by someone who wasnt paying attention. I'm sure this woman didnt analyze your entire appearance than decide to go with sir if everyone else saw you as female. She mostly likely was focused on things elsewhere.

I can understand how this could have been upsetting, I just dont see this thread of discuss how apparantly stupid and ignorant this woman is for making a mistake that happens all of the time is justified. Of course women can be tall, but in general they tend to have smaller builds. Probably why I have been mistaken for a women by people who arent paying attention or if I'm wearing a hood.

 

No, she has every right to be upset by the comment. I've been mistaken for female, even called a woman by bullies and assholes several times before, but that comes with the territory (height, body type, longer-than-average hair, androgynous features, and 'gentle' mannerisms; think Teru Mimaki from Death Note). I can see how a transperson, especially one who put so much effort into passing would be a little peeved for being mistaken for a member of the opposite gender. We don't know what the OP has been going through, and she might even be dealing with enough added stress in life that she finally 'popped'.

If you wouldn't normally react that way, it could be considered overreacting.

 

First of all, didn't you even stop to think about how upsetting this can be for the person being misgendered? I know its difficult for people who aren't trans to understand, but they way if feels, at least to me, is that you're being told you're a freak and your identity is completely invalid. It isn't just a simple mistake, and apart from the emotional affect on the person being misgendered, it may put them in danger. Have you heard of transgender remembrance day?

And it isn't actually about whether someone identifies as a woman or a man, its about whether someone is presenting as a woman. Wearing a dress is presenting as female and even if someone has a few male-ish features (and the OP says she doesn't), they're still presenting as female, and any idiot can see they want to be referred to as a woman.