Hi everyone! Not exactly the most pleasant topic to discuss, but I want your opinions. I've started dating this guy recently (2nd week "anniversary" today). Long story short, he seems really nice and so do all of his friends. No one has a bad word to say about him. But, two things of mine have gone missing recently (one of which turned up). But here's why I'm suspicious. First night out (Saturday night two weeks ago) my bank card went missing. I was fairly sure I'd left it in his house, but the drink had been flowing (lol) so I put it down to just my stupidity, and thought nothing more of it. It was on the back of my mind, as it's the first time I've lost ANYTHING on a night out - and I've been going clubbing EVERY weekend for the past four years. Fast forward to last Tuesday, and I was staying at his house. We got into bed and obviously took everything off. I left my watch on. But, I remember half way through the night taking it off because it was annoying me, and leaving it by his bedside. Next morning, I got dressed and left, and it was as I was half way down his street, I realised "crap, I've left my watch there". I didn't go back as I had other things to do, and thought I would text him about it. Basically forgot to text him, and last night when I arrived at his house, I remembered to ask him. The watch wasn't too expensive, it was moreso of sentimental value as my aunt had bought me it at Christmas. It wasn't by his bedside wwhere I thought I'd left it (Infact, I'm 99% sure that's where I left it). He then seemed quite...strange when I questioned him. As I knew he'd been the only person in his room (he confirmed that) my tone became quite accusatory. I was so annoyed as he was the only person who could have moved it - it was blatantly obvious. Long story short, we went down to his living room, and I saw him getting his laptop and things from underneath his seat. I went out to the kitchen (which joins onto the living room) and when I came back, my watch was sitting on the foot stool?!?! I'm almost sure it hadn't been there when I came in earlier? It has been bothering me now, as it just seems so strange? My bank card would be useless to him, as he would need a code to access the limited money on it and it's also been blocked. But I just don't understand it... NEVER in the past four years of me going out and getting drunk have I lost anything. But over a period of two weeks with him, I've lost TWO items? (The watch and card) Your opinions?! xx
I would not want to jump to any conclusions right now, just keep your whits about you and then see what the future holds. If he is trying to take things from you then I have no idea what to suggest other than just get away from him. But for now I would just act normal and keep a look out for any more odd goings on.
Well, the first thing I was going to suggest was to talk to him (so you could watch is body language), but you've already done that. I don't think this is necessarily enough to deem him a "thief" if you want to give him the benefit of the doubt. What I would chalk this up to is another factor to make it worth ending the relationship, if there are already other things going on that you're not totally comfortable with. You're supposed to be honest and comfortable in a relationship. If you feel like those aren't happening, you might as well call it off now while it's still young, less involved, and less complicated.
Is he an addict, gambling, drugs? Alcoholism? Clepto? Why would you even question this i understand feelings can blind us but guy is OBVIOUS.
its not really any proper proof he stole it... but he could of. just keep an eye out over the next few weeks, if things go missing more and more then id start talking to him about it.
As ridiculous as it sounds, it might be a genuine accident (the watch part). When my friends come over to my flat, they sometimes leave things and I live in organised chaos. So, I often move the items from the place they left it and then I forget about it. And then when they ask me about the items, my immediate response is 'no I don't think you did leave it, I can't find it anywhere'. Of course, it usually turns up sooner rather than later and I apologise for my laziness/bad memory/OCDness. ;p So he might have moved it and genuinely forgot you left it at his. The bank card is iffy though. Like others have said, there's not enough proof to say he's definitely stealing. It could all be coincidental; I would keep an eye on things though.
Well, while this is definetly rather suspicious, I recommend not accusing him right now. Rather, wait until the next time you loose something near him and see how he acts. Three times your out (!). Three times is when I recommend taking serious action, unless it is like five months from now
