Transpeople: Would you change?

I'm kind of confused with these questions, are you saying would you stay trans vs the sex you are and live a happy life as that sex...or living a happy dysphoria free life as the gender you identify as? Sorry, I just don't understand it clearly.

 

I would rather been born in the right female body and forget the nightmare that has lasted 40 years. I still would be June anyway and would have a husband and kids at 40 for sure. I look like my mom so I know what I would have looked like and guys would have gone even crazier about me. I am sure I still would have met Mike somehow, for I am sure we have been a couple in other lives. June

 

Got it! Makes sense now, thanks for clearing that up.

So for the first one, I'd definitely choose to have been born as male. Living in a females body and being called a girl based on what's between my legs is quite tiresome, and it just wears me out. I can't seem to think straight knowing that I have to put up a constant act as the female everyone knows me to be.

For the second what if...several times I've wished that I was just born a cisgendered female. I think life would be a lot easier just accepting your body at first and not carrying about being called by the pronouns everyone use on a daily basis as it is. But at the same time, being trans* is a part of me and I like who I am. So I wouldn't change it at all.

 

I'm going to answer both anyway (if that was the intent of this question? Sorry, I'm a tad confused as well.)

1. Oh, I'd do anything if I could have been born and socially raised as the gender I identify as. Anything to be a cis-male. No question. I don't really care much about what I've learned with identifying as trans, to be honest, I've only learned more about privilege and how brutal life is. Sure, I may have become much more tolerant and understanding of those under the gender (either non-binary, trans*) umbrella/spectrum, and have gained more life experience from it, but when you're anxiety-ridden and not smart, it doesn't have much value. I would not choose to stay the same as I am now, if I were granted a choice. Ultimately, my choice would have been being assigned male at birth, of course.

2. Personally, my opinion and thoughts change regarding my trans condition. Most of the time, I do wish that I could have lived and be satisfied with the sex I was assigned with at birth, so I wouldn't have to deal with dysphoria, discrimination, and financial/mental health problems which are currently overwhelming me at the moment. It doesn't necessarily guarantee for a better life, but at least I could go about feeling comfortable in my body.

In either senario, I wouldn't choose to be trans. Only cis. I'd practically do anything to have been born cis-male.

 

I'm really torn. Part of me feels exactly like Oddish. I went through growing up being told over and over that everything natural about me was wrong, getting in fights all the time for "acting gay" in grade school, I won't even get into my house situation, never even having a chance at pregnancy or the millions of little firsts that other girls get, losing pretty much all my friends at an early age because they were all girls... Yes there are perks to a male body. My little escape into my $20 computer that was older than I was growing up - it didn't even have a hard disk, just OSes on floppies - well I mean, it's a "boy" hobby and it might make me a decent living now like other "boy" hobbies tend to do. And I'm pretty sure I couldn't have survived my teenage years without the body armor mother nature and testosterone gave me, even if I hate wearing it now. I'm a very soft natured non violent person but being me has given me a tough core and taught me how to fight when I have to.

And that is why I'm torn. I'm a grown up with life goals and experiences. Those would have been different. My youthful change the world idealism has survived through two careers and college and a lot of people can't say that. And I'm choosing a life path that's going to be harder in some ways just being a woman, let alone a trans woman. I need my experience to be successful. My experiences were terrible in some ways, but they also made me who I am, and have given me a real shot at doing something worthwhile with my life. Maybe I won't succeed, but just having that chance is something. And plus, if I win my other fight - my life goals come first, I'm just pretty sure I won't be able to fulfill them if I'm fighting myself and my dysphoria; transitioning is not my #1 goal and I don't think it should have to be - and become a fully transitioned woman, and share my experience like a lot of people online have, then I've just made life a lot better for a lot of other people. My being trans might make it easier for other people to be trans.

I mean, if I could have spared an alternate reality version of me everything I grew up with, I would do that in a heartbeat. I would love to see her live her life, keep her friends into high school, learn make up about 20 years before I did, have her first kiss, come out gay to loving parents, and wait and wonder what she decided to do for a job, what religion she picked, what kind of music she'd be into. Maybe she'd even be a mom. It would feel so good just knowing that she was out there, and real.

But I don't want this identity erased. Not yet. I still have goals and dreams yet. Things to do.

 

I would live in a female body in heartbeat. I feel like the life I'm living now is a broken fragment of what I could have been. The lost childhood followed by 27 years of tears and suffering are well worth erasing. I would still have many other challenges to face like racism, heart disease, and dealing with being a lesbian; but those would be small hills to climb compared to Mt. Hell that I'm slowly descending now. And I honestly believe that I would still end up here helping in some capacity in an alternate reality. My core person would probably turn out exactly the same, only much happier and not nearly as poverty stricken.

 

Definitely would've rather been a cis-girl. It would've been so much easier. Being trans has caused me so much internal and external comfort that if I were given the choice, it'd be easy. However... being comfortable as a man? To be honest, that concept really weirds me out. I'd rather be a transwoman than a man. I do feel that being trans has awakened me and made me into a much better person than I might've ended up becoming.