I am a Masculine Gay Guy who is very much in the closet, are the years, various people have either asked if I am Gay or insinuated that I am Gay, to me I act like a Straight Guy & to a lot of other people they presume I am Straight, so why do a handful of people think I am Gay lol I know I am, but that's not the point, an openly Gay Guy at work, told one of the people who I have come out to that his Gaydar told him that I was Gay, any thoughts anyone?
You might be a case of glass closet? In that you think you're hiding properly in the closet, but the reality is somewhat "obvious" to the people around.
It's amazing how many people that are convinced they're fooling everyone and are undetectable are actually pretty obvious to anyone with well-tuned gaydar. I've said this before, but my friends and I will occasionally, when we're in a large group (say at a college event) where a lot of people know each other, play "find the hidden fairy" which is basically a joking way of describing the process of looking for closeted guys. And it can be interesting to see ones that you know are gay, and wait for them to come out. Sometimes it's weeks, sometimes years. So people are probably on to you more than you realize.
Pretty much what Chip said. I'm on the more feminine end of the spectrum, and for years I was baffled by how many people wanted to know if I was gay. You don't have to be flamboyant for people to catch on. Sometimes it's the little things that we do that give us away.
I have the same problem... I'm a very feminine girl, I don't really talk to girls much, I'm with guys a lot of the time, and I almost always.. 'had' a boyfriend... Even still, I was asked out by girls. :/ If only I had started accepting myself earlier...
I had people asking me if I was gay, in earnest and not jokingly, well before I'd even given the thought any consideration (so it wasn't a thing I was trying to hide; I legitimately had no idea, had never had any attraction to guys (or people), etc.), so I am similarly curious as to what particular traits it is that people apparently picked up on. I'm not at all "femmy", and, well, I can't really think of any other gay stereotypes off the top of my head to try and examine.
I don't think it has anything to do with being feminine or conforming to other gay stereotypes. It's probably a combination of many subconscious signs that people pick up on, ie avoiding discussions of the opposite sex, showing little to no interest in the opposite sex, having had no experience with sex or relationships with the opposite sex. These don't mean always mean someone is definitely gay, but they will set off alarms and have some people scratching their chins. And yeah, there are probably others involving mannerisms, preferences, physical features, and even pheromones, according to one study; those are just some of the big ones for me. You sometimes get a 'vibe' with certain people, which, for me, only makes me pay much closer attention if I'm curious enough. Some, you never know for sure. I do think some people might be better at picking up on these clues and guessing with greater accuracy, though, unless you're a psychic, there's really no way to be sure. One of my female friends says I seemed 'different', and that she is naturally attracted to 'different' people. I've pressed her time and time again, asking for an explanation, but it always seems ambiguous at best. Looking back, all those seemingly 'innocent' questions did seem to lead to something more - she now treats me something like a GBF. :lol:
It is strange how it works. Women never know I am trans and quite often want to date John thinking he is a straight man, but men always see June and accept her and treat her like a lady, where as gay guys always dislike me for some reason. It's like a triple standard! I can always pick the gay ones out, because they usuailly stair me down with daggers as the rest of the guys in the room give me attention, or just plain won't give me the time of day if it is one on one. As for you, if that blond in the pic is you, you are too perfect to be straight. June
Some of my friends KNEW I was, others thought I was always flirting with girls... I guess some are just magic and know.
Do you talk about women like straight guys do? What's your dating history with women? Maybe they form their opinions based on stuff like that.
