Self esteem down the drain!

If you're scared to be at 140 in someone's mind, then I'm here to say I'm at 230. I know I'm a bit on the stocky side, and I've been trying to lose some weight, but I'm fine with the way I look and feel. But believe me, you are nowhere even close to being fat. (*hug*)

 

I'd kill to weigh 140, but my fast metabolism makes it extremely difficult. That's actually very close to the ideal weight for my height and body type.

 

I weigh 129 pounds too but I'm a girl so I'm probably fatter than you...(I'm trying not to diet and eat whatever and whenever I want so that's why I weigh this much.)
Would it have made you feel better if they said you were lighter than you actually are? I hate it when people do that. Having my weight guessed (is that even a real expression?:icon_redf) is not very good for my self esteem either way. But I'd still prefer if they guessed a higher number than a lower. (I'm weird when it comes to weight...)
(*hug*)

 

...

@Chip +1

---------- Post added 20th May 2013 at 08:07 PM ----------

No offence, but it feels as though you just post these threads for attention.

Just sayin'.

---------- Post added 20th May 2013 at 08:07 PM ----------

No offence, but it feels as though you just post these threads for attention.

Just sayin'.

---------- Post added 20th May 2013 at 08:12 PM ----------

Also, 140lbs isn't fat...

I'm 5"9/verging on 10 & I weigh 65kg. I'm definitely not overweight.

 

Alex, I'm 133 pounds, and If someone said I looked heavier It wouldn't bother me in the slightest, because they'd be wrong.
I think you need to worry less about what others say about you.

 

This. 100% this.

The fact that this guy said that he thought you weighed more because muscle weighs more is a good thing. Muscle is certainly healthier (and more attractive, to some people) than just being skinny).

If you're acknowledging your reaction to his comment is a little over-the-top, try and focus on that fact rather than how bad you feel about the comment itself.

 

It's too bad, how pressured many gay men and straight women feel to reach an ideal body weight just to gain attention and please their partners. I understand there are numerous studies backing the idea that men are more visual, but I'm still not convinced an increase in disorders like anorexia and bulimia can be justified with that alone. Surely, striving to live a healthy lifestyle is a respectable and noble goal, but where do we draw the line? Forget that even slightly overweight gay men and straight women have a tough time being noticed, let alone given the time of day, by the majority. It all seems so silly when you really stop and think about it.

 

I'll tell you a little story, I used to weigh 180lbs, which was pretty light for my build. You would think that I would be happy right? Nope, I still though I was fat, even though everyone else thought that i should be eating more. I had low self esteem and body image issues. Now I weigh about 205lbs and am the most confident that I have been in years.

The moral, be confident in yourself, not your body weight. Don't tie your self worth into your outward appearance, that is self-destructive. you are not a hollow shell, there is more to you than how you look, there are a lot more important things than how you look. Tie your self worth to your accomplishments (not any having to do with weight!), to who you are as a person, to what you have to offer, not your bloody-freaking body weight.

Also, if you want to stand out and get noticed, be an awesome person, be an awesome friend, be the person that everyone thinks is a good guy, change your clothing style, do something that affect other people! Don't obsess about something that only you care about, that won't get you noticed, only pitied and looked down upon, and you don't want that.

 

There's your problem. A ten-pound discrepancy really isn't much and it's pretty queeny to act as if it is. If these things bother you that much, shouldn't it be in the mental health section?

 

10 or 20 pounds is nothing, Alexander. My weight fluctuates between 125-145 pounds, and nobody notices in the slightest. I'd consider getting help with body image if it concerns you this much. Weight isn't important, and I'm going to have to say that your happiness and confidence is not healthy if it depends on your weight.

 

But the thing is, that's irrational thinking. I know you know the difference between what you've been raised to believe and what is actually the case, so remind yourself of that.

 

First...don't ask questions you don't want to know the answer to. So don't reply to people who ask this unless they are a doctor or need to know for some really important reason.

Also, it's what, not even 15 pounds? That's nothing! If you weighed 150 and someone said you looked like you weighed 300, then you've got a major problem. I recently lost about 10 pounds over 6 months - a year...and honestly, my closest friends tell me they see a difference but I don't see a major difference. Don't feel bad if people guess up or down.

 

Hi! I am here to make you feel uncomfortable, I am 63kg - 5'7" - 17, haha! Just kidding! That's not fat! Don't feel fat, I feel very thin with my weight I hope I could gain a little.


I think you are very affected by what the media has been spewing out, 140lbs is not fat, at all. It's a typical body and it does not make one unattractive being 140, 175, 165 or anything.

And guess what, I do not feel confident with my weight. I found out that the best way to base your confidence is not on physical appearance because it is destructive; it would be too superficial.