Why do heterosexuals say gays are promiscuous?

Well I can't exactly disagree with that assessment, although a bit stereotypical. Research showed that men tend to think about sex around 20 times or less a day. We're basically more driven by sex than females. Now extrapolate that to gay guys, and you get the idea why people say gay guys are promiscuous.

 

It's because guys are generally hornier than girls, so without a woman effectively acting as a "cock-block", we get to do what we please!

 

I will agree with the previous answers but add to it that homosexuality is a much more recently liberated group (legally) in the west than some of the older main stays and with others you saw a similar level of sexuality increase.

Take women for example. As women have gained more rights and more control over their destinies, it seems to go hand in hand with ever shortening of skirt length through the 20th century. Feminism in the sixties was followed by the whole "free love" thing as women took control over their own sexual destiny, so to speak. Up until the late seventies from what I have read, there were still stings of gay bars and things like that in the west. It seems human nature when a group finds itself newly liberated they go a bit wild on the sexual front.

Add to this the issue with STDs and AIDs often incorrectly attributed to homosexuality and that which was mentioned by Chip and the others above me and you have a devils brew in the eyes of onlookers. I am not an expert and could be wrong in my observations.

 

I disagree with both statements. Firstly, women are equally as sexual as men, if not more. Our sex drive is more consistent than men's. And secondly, I think the fact that heterosexual people see homosexuals as promiscuous is that their unconsious view is that gays and lesbians wasn't content with straight sex, so we seek pleasures elsewhere. The unconsious or consious thought of many straight men is that we are just seeking sexual pleasure rather than love and commitment. They can't imagine a love-life with someone of their own sex, so they make it out to be only about sexual liberation.

 

Are lesbians generally perceived by heterosexuals as oversexed? I've always thought the stereotype involved a lack of sex, whereas people who think of gay men probably draw up associations of half nude men dancing, sleeping around, and constantly thinking and talking of anything related to penises.

I'm sure you've heard the joke that 'gay men are happy because they don't have to deal with women' and 'if gay means happy, does lesbian mean sad/unhappy?' From an early age, I've wondered what an all male or all female society would be like, and seeing how different gay men and lesbians are gives a clue into what one might look like on the surface.

For all the baggage many gay relationships come with, there's definitely something encouraging dating someone of the same sex; it takes a lot of the 'mystery' and frustrations out of the mix that drive many heterosexual couples apart. Who knows, maybe they can learn a thing or two from gay men and women, who consistently score higher in the satisfaction department.

 

They aren't any more than straight men are...but we live in a heteronormative society.

 

I haven't known enough gays well enough to be able to answer that. The ones I grew up with were at the stage of being sexually preoccupied as I also was.

---------- Post added 24th May 2013 at 02:14 PM ----------

I haven't known enough gays well enough to be able to answer that. The ones I grew up with were at the stage of being sexually preoccupied as I also was. My late gay brother described the male gay life as a meat market and that how someone and their boyfriend looks is paramount.

 

There are a number of reasons, I believe.

Homosexuality has been considered to be 'different' or 'abnormal', and people are often threatened by difference, so they choose to attack it, but suggesting this supposed abnormality causes people to be promiscuous, which is supposedly a bad thing.

Until recently, gay people couldn't marry anywhere in the world, meaning that gay people were confined to extramarital sex or not marrying at all, meaning that promiscuity was more likely.

I've heard it said that men can have sex with less risk of becoming emotionally attached. In terms of gay men, this means that a greater proportion of them will be willing to have one night stands and such things.

Homosexuality is still considered a bit different, and to come out as gay means you've broken some sex-related social conditioning. Its not as hard to break some more. Promiscuity isn't inherently wrong or anything, even if its looked down upon by some people. So once you've said 'I'm gay', why not say 'I'm going to have some sex'.

But after all, who cares? If you enjoy sex, and want to have lots of it, then do that. Saying that gay people are promiscuous is reliant on the belief that promiscuity is bad, which it isn't.

 

Because they are, at least gay men are. Men are biologically programed to want more partners than women, so men who like men have a lot of partners.

 

I think it's largely a result of historical practises and perceptions. As it was extremely difficult for men to have sustained relationships in the past they regularly had to make do with anonymous encounters in public toilets and parks and the like, which obviously equals promiscuity. And that atitude got carried on once it became more accepted in society to be gay with gay clubs, and has continued with the rise of hook-up apps. I'd be interested to hear if there has been any actual research into the number of sexual partners of gay/ straight men/ women.

 

I think it's because those people a just prejudiced. I mean, come on, straight people are sometimes promiscuous, too.

I had a Christian friend once that gave me her own explanation:

"They have so many partners because they're unhappy. They're unhappy because they're doing something wrong. If they'd just get together with someone of the opposite sex, they'd be happy. Then they'd stop sleeping around. They can't just keep ignoring God's plan for their lives."

I didn't say anything to her, but I found her explanation to be very homophobic. Like I said, some straight people are promiscuous, too, sometimes. I think homophobic people thrust these stereotypes on gays/lesbians because they want to tell everyone how "evil and sinful gay people are" *gasp*!

 

I think promiscuity can be an effect of being in the closet. If you're in the closet, it's a whole lot easier to arrange a one-night-stand without being discovered than it is to carry on a long-term relationship without being discovered. As a result, closeted gays who aren't willing/able to remain celibate or come out typically become promiscuous.

Plus, it may be that some of the more visible examples of gay culture, especially a few decades ago, were gay bars, which like straight bars are more a place to meet one-night-stands than long-term partners.

I think monogamous gays have become a lot more common now than they used to be, due to greater opportunity to be out without suffering serious consequences, but it'll take awhile for cultural stereotypes to catch up.

---------- Post added 28th May 2013 at 11:05 AM ----------

I thought the stereotype was that lesbians like threesomes with voyeuristic guys.

 

I don't recall the study, but back in the 80s, they found the average gay man had far more sexual partners than the average straight man. In other words, they think we're promiscuous because we are. Or at least were.

One of my straight friends once asked me, "Why do you gay guys have so much sex?" I responded, "Um, because we can?"

Lex