Changing/Locker Rooms?

I feel comfortable with guys, but maybe that's my orientation... anyway, it is stupid. just because they have a different orientation doesn't mean that they aren't your gender.

 

When I was in high school there was this other student in the class...he painted his nails, wore make-up, cross-dressed, etc. He would walk into the locker room with the boys, change, and then go to the girls gym class. I assume he was transgender, but I never knew officially. I use the pronoun "he" but I'm really not sure if thats appropriate.

Anyway, nobody once gave this person shit. He would walk in, change and leave. It was never awkward. He kept to himself and wouldn't really look around.

I don't know if this really helps with your question, but locker rooms have never been a big deal to anyone I know, and remember that this student did all this stuff in high school. I really doubt its a big deal to most people.

 

Its society today, If they saw that, they would ostracize.

 

I changed and showered in locker rooms all the time in college. Despite what straights think (and really straights seem weirdly obsessed with sex) I managed without either checking out or attacking every guy in the place.

There might be an occasional moment of noticing someone particularly good looking of my 'type' but otherwise I:

a) had things to do and places to be

b) figured most everyone was straight and therefore of no interest to me

In my mind there's no real reason why men and women couldn't share lockerrooms other than cultural silliness that assumes that people are incapable of controlling themselves and that simultaneously obsesses about sex and says it should be forbidden. Meh.

Todd

 

In theory, I have agree with you. In fact, I recently made a thread commenting that I feel more comfortable with the idea being nude in front of other guys in a locker room, even though I am gay.

A lot hinges on exactly what is involved with "changing." If it's just clothes (say, from street clothes to a swim suit, or exercise outfit), it doesn't seem to be a big deal from what I hear. Of course, with just changing clothes, one can do it in ways to minimize or even avoid nudity. Not sure about what tricks females might do , but males can do things with long shirts to shield their groin area as they change clothes there.

Full nudity is another matter. Many straight people would, I think, be uncomfortable. (But not all.) Then, again, many straight people are uncomfortable being nude, period.[

Note: I wrote a post with some similar points that I deleted, since I felt this would address the issue better.

 

I think a lot to do with this is men not wanting to be vulnerable. Basically, another one of the stupid "Man" mentality.

It's a weird projection, where they imagine that because they always yearn to see naked female bodies (especially that of the cute female class mate), that gay man will want to see a cute male class mate's naked body too. That idea puts them in a vulnerable spot, and they hate it.

At least that goes for people who mention being uncomfortable around gay guys in locker rooms or showers.

 

Good point.

Or how about thinking of this way: why can't we move past the thought that nudity automatically means sex?

 

I used to assume everyone was straight as well. That never stopped me from checking out some people . Well...let's just say on some instances *cough* Miette Hot Springs in Alberta *cough* I knew that I was not straight

 

What's the big deal? This is the same type of reasoning you hear of when people say 'men and women can't be friends!' I don't think men and women are going to share locker rooms anytime soon - as a society we're far too immature for that.

I was taught from an early age that gawking was rude, and doubly so if it's at another man, especially a half nude man. They have nothing I don't have, and with guys, it's generally 'take care of business and get out'.

Now, feeling small because I was that scrawny kid in PE is another issue entirely, and noticing other mens' bodies would only make me feel worse about myself, so that's another factor to consider.

 

Almost all showers I've seen have been fully open group showers. One exception was at a YMCA I toured, which was built in the last 10 years or so.

From what I hear, historically women are more likely to get privacy than guys.

 

Well, my school doesn't have showers since they leak (they're fixing them soon...). However, when it comes to changing, I see the exact same people everyday and usually I mind my own business (unless someone gets an eye-catching tattoo). Usually, many people would just mind their own business and/or not care at all.

 

I feel regardless of your orientation, we are raised that men are to be more comfortable with men and women with women in the changing/ showering aspect of things. I think the argument may have been logical in theory, but in reality it's not.

 

2 possible arguments, but no idea how any will fly. They are biased towards the male view since that's my sex, and also because of the BSA talk above.

• The physical similarity argument. Or, putting it more crudely, it's not unusual to find a penis dangling on a guy, whether he's straight, gay, or asexual.
• Gays are not likely to come after straight guys (one fear straight guys seem to have). They will want another gay.

 

I never went into the locker room looking for sex so I never thought about this. The older I get unless you are involved with a person it is just so many body parts. Today I can see the logic and benefit of nudism. Those people do not have nudity wrapped into sex. Look at doctors, do you think a gay doctor gets excited by the 100th naked penis of the day?

Society is just twisted.

A breast is a breast is a breast, etc, etc, etc...

 

I guess that's where one problem lies - determining who is gay and who isn't, without them telling you firsthand. Again, one of my criticisms is how many gay men will assume someone is gay without knowing a person beyond a name and a face, especially common with a lot of the younger crowd.

On the other hand, you have straight men who don't want to appear gay, not just for the ridicule and exclusion it would bring from many heterosexuals, but because it might invite unwanted advances from gay men, and honestly, who wants that, especially when it involves a loss of manhood and respect?

So, the problem might be boundaries... plenty of straight guys catch crap and are suspected of being gay, just like many gay men are able to easily slip past 'gaydar' and blend in with the crowd. And contrary to what many people believe, men can and should be able to control themselves... one of the many assumed traits of manhood, constantly wanting to f*** and having no power over their impulses. I find it insulting that I'm judged as a threat simply for being born with XY chromosomes.

 

That was pretty much how I figured out I was gay was my freshman year of high school, I played football, and after practice in the summer, there were guys coming out of the shower, pretty much showing off to the other guys by strutting their naked bodies. Thankfully nobody noticed the evidence. (Boing)

 

I think you're all right in a way but for me this was always complicated. Ultimately, I did whatever I could to avoid the situation because it would raise my anxiety to see guys changing and showering. I think I was scared of being found out if I sneaked a look. This week I learned at a lecture from a civil rights attorney, that in NY, transgender people, regardless of their anatomy have a right to use any facility, male or female, that they want even if it makes people uncomfortable. So I know a young man, who is biologically female, but since he identifies himself as a boy, dresses as a boy, etc., he uses the boys room. That is even more complicated. But, he thinks of himself as a guy and he's not interested in guys because he's not gay; he's interested in girls. Good luck figuring all of this out! I think we just need to accept nudity from anyone and everyone

---------- Post added 29th May 2013 at 06:44 PM ----------

I don't want to give the impression I don't support transgender folk because I totally do. I just think there's a need for a lot of education on to issue.