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gays exposed

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Maea96, Jun 6, 2013.

  1. Maea96

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    So a thought just crossed my mind. I have never really seen any gay couples in public. I always see maleXfemale holding hands, but I've never actually seen girlxgirl or manxman holding hands. Why is this? Are some of them afraid to do it because they might get harrassed?

    If I ever get a boyfriend in the future, I would need to be comfortable holding his god damn hand if I want to, on the way to school or in my spare time.

    Also I think it would refresh me a bit to see some gay couples holding hand or even being openly affectionate. Because currently I feel like every gay hide themselves.
     
  2. BornInTexas

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    Most of the time, yah. They might get dirty looks or called names, and they just don't want to go through that. Well, at least in my area.
     
  3. Mlpguy88

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    You could be right that they don't do it out of fear. I have seen same sex couples holding hands before and no one around seemed to mind. Although to be honest I wouldn't want to hold hands in public, I don't like public displays of affection but that is just me
     
  4. Boyfriend

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    I think it totally depends on where you are. In my town you´d be a target, but in New York nobody will look twice....
     
  5. LD579

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    It depends where you live, and it depends where you spend time around. In a certain area of Vancouver, I see quite a few guys holding hands together, and it is refreshing and sweet to see it. Perhaps I just don't notice 'straight' couples or 'lesbian couples' doing so, though, as I myself am a gay guy. It may be half perception and half about where you go, or something similar.
     
  6. Boyfriend

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    By the way, I don´t think gays hide themselves. But to start with, only a percentage of people are gay and only a percentage of those are in a relationship and only a percentage of that are holding hands kind of type anyway... So that leaves you with very few that you might possibly catch holding hands...
    And they might just be at another place at that time than were you are at any given time...
    That you don´t see them doesn´t mean gays don´t hold hands.

    Another thing is that some people aren´t comfortable with showing affection in the first place and some are not comfortable with showing affection in public. Regardless of their sexuality.

    My boyfriend is very touchy and wants to hold hands in public. I´m not a handholding guy, but we sort of meet in the middle, with holding hands at certain places where I feel more at ease with it. I don´t want to be seen by my friends or guys in general. I don´t know if it is because it doesn´t feel safe or simply because I´m not completely out or whatever.
     
  7. MixedNutz

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    Between north jersey and NYC I've seen it a lot. I've held my mans hand in public a few times.
     
  8. Adarya

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    It will always depend on the area you live in and the culture(s) that are involved in the area. In the town of Minnesota that I live in it's generally not seen too much, although I've seen a couple of guys holding hands at the mall every so often. In the Twin Cities though it's refreshing to see more same-sex couples holding hands walking down the streets, so that's always nice.
     
  9. Rexmond

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    Apparently two gay men were kissing somewhere near my school (where my school bus drives past), and one day two men were affectionately kissing. This was a few years ago, when I wasn`t out to anyone, but from what my friend who was on the bus told me, a lot of people opened windows and started shouting and harassing them. I really wish I saw something like that in public, or maybe one one day it`ll happen to me. :astonished:
     
  10. Rakkaus

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    Depends on where you live I think. I've seen plenty of gay couples holding hands in New York City. If you live in a small town though, you probably won't see that.
     
  11. I've actually seen a few gay and lesbian couples around. A few doppelgangers too! I made a complete fool of myself recently cause I thought I ran into my mom's friend who just adopted a baby.

    Instead I waved like a madman at two random lesbians with a baby.
     
  12. Owen

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    Rarely, but I have seen it happen. One occurrence that sticks out in my mind is that I recently saw two women holding hands when I was getting off the train one night. And not only that, but they were smiling at each other while talking, and then they kissed for a good second or two. And then kissed again. And nothing happened: no cat calls, no insults, nothing. I was proud of my city that day. :slight_smile:

    You bring up a great point.

    On top of that, now that I think about it, I really don't see many man+woman couples holding hands all that often. So if we factor in the statistical scarcity of us gay folks on top of the fact that seeing a couple holding hands is already a scarce thing, the small number of gay couples I've seen holding hands isn't that unusual.
     
  13. sugarcubeigloo

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    It's not very unusual to see same-sex couples holding hands in the city and its suburbs. I see a lot more female couples than male though.

    I always smile when I see a gay couple holding hands. I guess it's because it's something I aspire to.

    Sometimes when I see two guys from a distance, walking close to each other, it looks like they're holding hands. I'm always slightly disappointed when they're not. :lol:
     
  14. King

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    I don't like holding hands to begin with. Or, any public affection really.

    I'm very reserved, though, and even in downtime I'm still not overly affectionate.
     
  15. Martjain

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    Holding hands? I've seen some.
    But one day on the bus I saw two lesbians kissing, to say the least, they were practically eating each other out in the middle of the bus and people barely looked. I was truly proud.
     
  16. Rakkaus

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    Well you might see women more because, with females, there is a decent chance that they are just friends who happen to be holding hands, since that is considered fairly acceptable behavior without implying anything about sexuality (just like women friends call each their "girlfriends" and go to the bathroom together and all that without implying lesbianism). Even if they are actually a couple, society is less likely to judge them in that way.

    With males, the chance that two straight guys are just walking around holding hands as friends is pretty close to zero, and any guys who do that are automatically going to be branded by society as gay.
     
  17. RainSprite

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    I would think it's because it draws more attention in most areas, and perhaps some individuals don't like to be the center of attention or stared at. It can be quite uncomfortable being stared at. There's also always the possibility of people throwing insults at them, etc.

    Never really thought too much about this. I've never even dated or had a significant other before. So, the only hand holding I've ever done is with my younger siblings/nephews when in the parking lot and crossing the street.
     
  18. SimplyJay

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    Where I live I've never once seen a same-sex couple holding hands.
    When in Denver one time I saw 2 guys holding hands walking on the sidewalk infront of me.
    (that ofcourse doesn't count the couple times when I went to PrideFest where I've also seen guys kiss)
     
  19. AKTodd

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    I've seen two young (late teens/early 20s) guys holding hands in our local 'gayborhood' (such as it is) while walking down the street while we were driving through one day. But other than that, haven't seen anything like that in this particular part of the country.

    Todd
     
  20. Incognito10

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    Depends on where you're located. In my nearest city, Washington, D.C., it is not uncommon to see openly gay couples at all.