Nostalgic?

It's probably true that you're looking at being a teenager through rose-colored glasses. I sort of wish I had found love as a teenager and had a life right out of Degrassi, but compared to now, I was an idiot. I had almost as many stresses as I do now, yet was far less equipped to deal with them, and I'm talking emotionally, socially, and logistically. It just was never as cool as was promised. And to put the final nail in the coffin for my wishing to be 16 again, I think I'm better-looking now than I was then.

You're one year older than I am, and I still consider myself fairly young. So don't worry so much; being a twenty-something can be pretty awesome.

 

I wish I was out some time ago, yet I still feel like being out before 10th grade would've been horrible. Most everyone in 7th-9th grade seemed to be homophobic or had slight homophobic tendencies. The gay people at our school got picked on daily so it really wasn't the ideal place to be out. However I still like the thought of having met someone I could love and spend time with like I saw some people find each other throughout the years.

You shouldn't dwell on the past. You can't get the time back, the only thing you can do is make the best of the time you've got left. I hate to think this way myself, but it's true and sometimes I wish I'd have done things differently but... L.I.F.E.G.O.E.S.O.N.

 

I feel the same way. I'm really nostalgic for my teenage years, which I feel like I wasted. (Though during my teenage years, I hated it, I felt nostalgic for my childhood years)

But like you say, we are still young, at least in relative terms, we need to keep that in mind. Gay men are known for acting younger than they are (the 'Peter Pan syndrome'), and I think what you describe is exactly the reason for it. A lot of us were denied a normal youth.

Fortunately it's changing now as being gay is becoming more accepted so teens and even preteens are feeling comfortable coming out and having relationships. But that doesn't help us who've already entered our 20s.

Age is only a number though. If you still feel younger, act like you're younger. Live out all the things you wish you would have done as a teen as a twenty-something. The number on your birth certificate means nothing really.

 

Oh yes I am extremely nostalgic as well. It seems like I am always looking 5 years into my past, yearning for the "simpler" times. I also have had some big regrets for how I spent my teenage years trying to fit into a straight world. So much frustration... I basically spent all that time wanting a relationship with a guy without even realizing that I am gay. No progress could be made, and I spent the whole time wishing I could have something more in many of my friendships.. yet I didn't even know what that something was.

So there is a big part of me that wishes I could redo the last several years, knowing what I know now. However, those struggles really helped shape me into who I am today. Had I taken a different path things might have been better, but they could just as easily have gone far worse.

In any case, all I can do now is try to remain optimistic that the best years have yet to come. Even if I don't find my perfect match until I'm 30 or 40, it won't matter. Being able to spend the remainder of my life with that person will make up for the endless years of hopeless searching.