I had to write a speech for debate club, but our president said that I'm not supposed to be a serious speech. Tell me what you think: I’e encountered some really great reasons for the outright banning of gay marriage and shunning of homosexuals. Here are a few: A very common reason is that marriage is a child-based institution. So I support a new law, that I very much hope will be passed, outlawing the marriage of infertile people and the elderly. Additionally, for every year a couple is married without children, they will pay a 20000 dollar fine. Another brilliant reason is that homosexual marriage is sinful in the eyes of the church. This is a wonderful idea, especially with marriage not predating religion! We should also extend this ban to anger, jealousy, overweight people, and people of other religions--if you have ever gotten angry, jealous, or overweight, or been a non-Christian, you are banned from full rights in this country. I’m just glad this country of ours doesn’t have separation of church and state, what a nightmare that would be! One of the best reasons is that homosexuality destroys the sanctity of marriage. I think we can all agree that Kim Kardashian’s 72-day just-for-fun marriage shouldn’t be violated by commited partners of several years. And another great reason is that it’s not natural. Being gay is clearly a choice--because, you know, people love choosing to lead lives filled with discrimination. Some people say that homosexuality must be natural because animals engage in homosexual behavior. But they’re clearly just choosing! Finally, the most important and obvious reason: if we allow this behavior, what’s next? A man marrying a 5 year-old? A man marrying a duck? A woman marrying a shower? Because, you know, the marriage of two grown adults who love each other and are commited is on the same level as a duck, which has the ability to engage in consensual sex, and has the legal standing necessary to sign a marriage contract.
Isn't that a serious speech? OK, 2 things: 1. Isn't this almost like coming out to everyone in the debate club? Are you fine with this? 2. The reasoning isn't really tight. I'll be back in a bit to show you where. ---------- Post added 15th Jun 2013 at 06:05 AM ---------- OK, I'll play someone who's against gay marriage, because that's how a debate works. You need an opponent. :lol: 1. No joke (IMO)! Is this supposed to be a debate, or just a speech? Because if it's a speech, it works great, but if it's a debate, your humorous take on it may not fly well. If it's a debate, I would show the case of infertile people and the elderly and present the question of whether or not their marriage is valid, instead of making a joke about a non-existing law. Same with the rest. 2. #3 is under the assumption that animals can't choose. Can you prove they can't?
I don't think they choose their sexuality, but I know for a fact my kitten made a conscious choice not to eat his delicious rat friends. I could see him wrestling with his urges while he played with them.
