Well, the situation is this: There is a boy/guy that is driving me crazy. I see him pretty much everyday at the gym. Have never spoke to him nor do I know his name, but I find him adorable. I'm not really a shy person, but I just hadn't have the chance to talk to him. He doesn't seem very outgoing either, I mean he does what he comes to do, doesn't really talk to anybody and leaves. (He would never take a shower or anything like most of the other users, unfortunately for me, haha) Well the point is I'm really thinking about aproaching him one of these days, but not really just to talk, I'm planning to be very straight forward like asking him if he's gay or just giving him my number. I'ld tell him to never mind if he is not interested and that he has nothing to worry about. In that case I would just leave never to talk to him again. A while ago, I'ld have thought this is crazy but I am just so tired of never taking any risks and losing opportunities, cause I'm pretty sure I have. The thing here is that I don't have the slightest hint about him being gay. What if he takes it really bad? I know I'll be outing myself to him and maybe other people as well, but I'm not really concerned about that, I just don't wanna feel like a creepy stalker, which is probably what I would look like.:bang: Its crazy right? What would you do?
Sorry man, I know exactly what you mean. I've been there before, I'll probably be there again soon, and it sucks. Personally, I wouldn't approach him out of fear that he would take it really bad, but that's not to say that you shouldn't just get to know him as a friend first. But I go by what they say, you can never be too careful. Even where I live in New York state, I am extremely wary of who I tell about my sexuality. Best of luck.
*******Update After not seeing this boy for a while I had almost completely forgot about him. However, today after swimming I saw him at the locker room (got to see him in his briefs :wow: but that's not the point). The thing is that I suddenly felt really sad when I realized that I will probably never have the chance to even talk to him. Its like if he would be gay I would at least have a shot, of course there would still be the chance that he wouldn't be into me, but I could at least try. Or if I was straight and it was a girl I would have no problem aproaching her and finding out if she is interested, but with a guy, specially one that gives no signs of being gay at all, I just can't find the courage to do it. If he takes it the wrong way I wouldn't only have to deal with the rejection but with the social stigma. And this is not only about him but any other guy that I might be interested in and will probably never know what could have happened. :icon_sad: Thanks for reading.
you could walk up to him and say youve seen him around as youre at the gym often and if next time he wants to work out with you like a gym buddy and take it from there? or is that not what guys do? idk. you dont have to hint youre gay you can try and be friends and take it from there.
if you get to see him again at least offer to spot with him on the weights talk about sports & stuff assuming your into sports .
Well I could do that, hopefully it would look natural and he won't think I'm being over friendly for no reason. Thanks guys.
I do not know about your situation but some people freak out if they ask them if they are gay. I would take a chance,but be subtile and dont tell him you are gay because he might make your life miserable ._.
Yeah, I won't be telling him straight forward anymore, that was a silly idea of me, now I'll have to think on other more subtle ways to figure out this guy or otherwise forever hold my peace. :bang:
Do you assume he is gay,if yes why? ---------- Post added 7th Sep 2013 at 07:25 PM ---------- Frankly,you are the one who knows what to do best.I wish you luck.
Yep, do the gym buddy thing. That's an excellent suggestion. You're united by a common intetest, so use it as a diving board. Chat him up, poke a little, and if he seems like he could be gay you have a shot. I wonder if while spotting him, you could slip in something like "Dude, all my friends don't want to workout with me. Their girlfriends would rather them stay home and do stuff. Can you believe that? You must have a pretty cool girlfriend man." Drop that line and see what happens. If he says "yeah she's great" well, he's probably str8 m8.
Ask him out, trust me even if he's heavily homophobic he will probably just say "sorry man I don't swing that way" or "I'm flattered but not really interested right now". Plus would you rather have the constant pain of not knowing you could of had something or a few hours-days of pain then getting over him?
No, that's the problem, I don't think he is but then you never know, thanks. ---------- Post added 7th Sep 2013 at 08:42 PM ---------- It's a good idea indeed, the only thing is in my gym there's always staff around helping users so spotting doesn't really happen that much, alas I'm not really the type of guy someone will ask for help, I'm skinny you know ha, but those lines are good, I may get to use them one day. Thanks. :icon_wink ---------- Post added 7th Sep 2013 at 08:47 PM ---------- God, this is what I wanted to do in the first place, but I don't know anymore, if things go the wrong way I could at least get over it as you said, but if I do get the courage, now I would like it to be on a way that he gets I'm interested on him but with out being blunt about it.
