1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Could you be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice/sin?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Steele, Jun 21, 2013.

?

Could you?

  1. Yes

    27 vote(s)
    24.5%

  2. No

    48 vote(s)
    43.6%

  3. Maybe/Not sure

    35 vote(s)
    31.8%
Thread Tools

Thread Tools

Page 1 of 4
  1. Steele

    Steele
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 18, 2013
    Messages:
    631
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    West Coast, United States
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Would you be able to be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice or a sin? And why or why not?

    Personally, I don't think I could. I've tried so hard to remind myself that these beliefs that homosexuality is a choice and/or a sin are all they've ever known, all they've ever grown up with, and that telling these people that they're wrong is just as frustrating for them as it is for me being told that homosexuality is a choice or a sin, but...I just can't bring myself to accept these people for hating something about me that I have no control over.

    I grew up not knowing what it meant to be gay and not knowing that same-sex attraction was possible, while constantly being told that I would eventually find myself attracted for women. And for as long as I can remember, I was always waiting for and anticipating that day when I would find myself attracted to women, yet I still turned out gay. But because I didn't know what it meant to be gay and I didn't know that same-sex attraction was possible, I didn't realize that these feelings I had for men were the same feelings everyone was telling me I would develop for women, so I was still waiting for and anticipating that day when I would find myself attracted to women, but it never came. So whenever someone tells me that it's a choice that I made or a sin, I just get so angry and frustrated, and I just can't take that kind of bullshit from people.

    Anyways, what about you guys?
     
    #1 Steele, Jun 21, 2013
  2. Ridiculous

    Ridiculous
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 8, 2010
    Messages:
    3,583
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    New Zealand
    Re: Could you be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice/sin

    I could be friendly towards them. I certainly wouldn't consider them a friend though.
     
    #2 Ridiculous, Jun 21, 2013
  3. Rexmond

    Rexmond
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 3, 2013
    Messages:
    687
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    England
    Re: Could you be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice/sin

    One of my best friends (who I've been friends with for years - since primary school) believes that gay people have a spirit inside from a demon or something. Stupid as fuck, but it's his religious beliefs, and despite them he still respects that I'm gay just as I respect the fact he's religious. Sad thing is, he didn't always believe this but his mum basically forced him into the religion.
     
    #3 Rexmond, Jun 21, 2013
  4. Tightrope

    Tightrope
    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 31, 2013
    Messages:
    5,415
    Likes Received:
    387
    Location:
    USA
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Re: Could you be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice/sin

    I know a few people like that. It's like politics. You don't bring it up. Generally, they are also Republican and very religious. I think that they are misinformed. Sometimes, their other personal qualities such as being helpful or generous are nice. However, a lot of their opinions on subjects are narrow-minded, so they are hard to be around for extended periods of time.
     
    #4 Tightrope, Jun 21, 2013
  5. biggayguy

    biggayguy
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jun 4, 2013
    Messages:
    2,082
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Ohio
    Re: Could you be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice/sin

    Yes, provided that they don't try to push their belief down my throat. I used to have those same beliefs so I cut them a little slack. If they start preaching then I withdraw myself.
     
    #5 biggayguy, Jun 21, 2013
    Last edited: Jun 21, 2013
  6. Pain

    Pain Guest

    Re: Could you be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice/sin

    I am gay. That is not subjective upon anyone's beliefs. I would not, could not be a friend to anyone who believed otherwise.
     
    #6 Pain, Jun 21, 2013
  7. chrisV

    chrisV
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jun 6, 2013
    Messages:
    229
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    an island that is long
    Re: Could you be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice/sin

    i tried. after hanging out with him for a few months, i can't take anymore. he never shuts up about religion, and he won't stop telling everybody that homosexuality is a sin. i think he thinks that it's his duty to shove his beliefs down other peoples throats. he doesn't even know i'm gay, but if he did, i'm not kidding, he would probably attack me (he is a lot bigger than me, and he goes to some radical pentecostal church that preaches for the death of gay people :/)
     
    #7 chrisV, Jun 21, 2013
  8. Hexagon

    Hexagon
    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 1, 2011
    Messages:
    8,558
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Earth
    Re: Could you be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice/sin

    No. But I treat people with respect, and I would be willing to listen if they should ever want to talk about it, and I'd give them a chance if they were willing to change. But the reason I couldn't be their friend is to do with trust. For me anyway, trust is the difference between a friend and everyone else you know, and I just wouldn't feel comfortable putting my trust in someone who hates a part of me.
     
    #8 Hexagon, Jun 21, 2013
  9. Theagonist

    Theagonist
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2013
    Messages:
    353
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Missouri
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    All but family
    Re: Could you be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice/sin

    I have a lot of freinds that do, I guess not "friends... aquantices maybe
     
    #9 Theagonist, Jun 21, 2013
  10. MerBear

    MerBear
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 25, 2012
    Messages:
    3,056
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    east coast
    Re: Could you be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice/sin

    i have two friends that do
     
    #10 MerBear, Jun 21, 2013
  11. Bolin

    Bolin
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2011
    Messages:
    4,335
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    South Carolina
    Re: Could you be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice/sin

    I think I've spent enough time being around "friends" who believe that being gay is a sin and/or a choice. I'm done with that chapter of my life. If you can't accept all of me, then you will have none of me.
     
    #11 Bolin, Jun 21, 2013
  12. Hefiel

    Hefiel
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2013
    Messages:
    1,061
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Montréal
    Re: Could you be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice/sin

    I wouldn't. To me, it's one thing to be ignorant, that can be addressed by educating the person, but it's another thing to prefer to remain ignorant despite the evidence.

    If a "friend" of mine were to believe that homosexuality is a sin (and luckily for me, I don't live in a very religious area) and would not change his views, then I want as little as possible to do with that person. Not because I disagree with him, but because it's choosing to remain ignorant despite the significant amount of evidence pointing otherwise.
     
    #12 Hefiel, Jun 21, 2013
  13. BryanM

    BryanM
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 19, 2013
    Messages:
    2,894
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Columbia, Missouri
    Gender:
    Genderqueer
    Gender Pronoun:
    They
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Re: Could you be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice/sin

    My friend used to think it's a choice, but I was able to change his way of thinking. Honestly, I think I could be friends with them, as long as they aren't hateful towards me about it.
     
    #13 BryanM, Jun 21, 2013
  14. Minx

    Minx
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 29, 2013
    Messages:
    1,293
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Colorado
    Re: Could you be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice/sin

    It would be a strained friendship, but if they ever needed my help I'd be there for them. :slight_smile:
     
    #14 Minx, Jun 21, 2013
  15. PurpleRain

    PurpleRain
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2013
    Messages:
    696
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Skyrim... I have no life, and enjoy it. :D
    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Re: Could you be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice/sin

    Well... yeah. My cousin is homophobic and I'm sure is probably transphobic too, but he's one of my best friends (Mind you he knows nothing about me in that regard and of course I don't like that he's that way). I know a lot of people like that, but if that's what they believe it's what they believe and even though it's wrong and bigoted you really can't change it. You just have to deal with it sometimes.
     
    #15 PurpleRain, Jun 21, 2013
  16. 2112

    2112
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jun 4, 2013
    Messages:
    651
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Michigan
    Re: Could you be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice/sin

    I find it very ironic that this is your 666th post.
     
    #16 2112, Jun 21, 2013
  17. Owen

    Owen
    In Loving Memory Full Member

    Joined:
    Jul 20, 2007
    Messages:
    613
    Likes Received:
    13
    Location:
    Massachusetts, USA
    Re: Could you be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice/sin

    Absolutely not. I have a plethora of people in my life who not only accept that I'm gay (and are educated enough to know it's not a choice), but embrace it and embrace me. There's no way I could ever be friends with someone that misinformed/hateful when I have so many informed, loving people in my life. Why compromise?
     
    #17 Owen, Jun 21, 2013
  18. MatthewJS

    MatthewJS
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2012
    Messages:
    118
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Alaska
    Re: Could you be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice/sin

    one of my "friends" say its a choice and we argued for over an hour debating that its choice when I say its by birth. im about to cut all contacts from her. and called me stupid because I say its by birth when she is the stupid one because she says its by choice... naïve girl.

    just like what Ridiculous, I would be friendly (except two people who I am enemies with) but not be friends with them.
     
    #18 MatthewJS, Jun 21, 2013
  19. Valerie

    Valerie Guest

    Joined:
    May 5, 2013
    Messages:
    2
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    In my house
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Re: Could you be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice/sin

    No, because those people are close minded and I usually don't talk with people like that, so it's hard to become friends with them.

    Everybody I know is open minded and none of them is religious, maybe not my father, but I didn't really have a choice the meet him, did I?
     
    #19 Valerie, Jun 21, 2013
  20. Randy

    Randy
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Aug 23, 2012
    Messages:
    3,784
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    Texas
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Re: Could you be friends with someone who believes that homosexuality is a choice/sin

    I could under certain circumstances. Although, I just started getting comfortable in my own skin this summer when I'm away from my college campus so the person that MIGHT have a problem with it has no clue. However, they have no problem with any of my other friends that are gay and they certainly don't preach to them.

    But then again, I go to a VERY liberal campus so most of them can expect most of the population to be gay and they are very friendly toward them.

    All in all: We'll see what happens this Fall, I'm very close to them and have abs. no problem with them. I don't see why they would a problem with me just because of my lifestyle.
     
    #20 Randy, Jun 21, 2013
(You must log in or sign up to post here.)
Page 1 of 4