My mom has been making me angry lately. She nags me constantly to clean up, even when things are clean, and she says that I can't go to friends' houses because I didn't clean my room. I don't know what to clean! She tells me to shave my legs because if I don't, it looks disgusting. She wants me to go shopping with her but not in the guys' section. She keeps saying "you're a GIRL, start acting like one!" it makes me so mad. I overheard her the other day calling me useless and saying that i should be wearing skirts and growing my hair out. i really wish i could tell her that im trans but if i do shell refuse to believe it and probably stop talking to me. ugh
Hey Typical Dude! I can totally relate to your Mom driving you crazy. Don't worry mine does too. You know when things are better left said till another time, well my mom has all of the wrong times... Cleaning my room or fixing your computer before a final is not the right time... Lol. Your not useless. Contrary to your Mom's beliefs but maybe she know you might be trans but is in denial right now. You have a right to be who you want to be and if your Mom won't support you, we will! Back when I was 13 my dad tried to get me to play basketball. I hate basketball and he wanted me to join a team. He nagged me for 2 years until he just gave up. Stick by your values and who you want to be and if you're proud of it, then be proud! Good luck! Hopefully your mom comes around.
That's really cruel of her. As a mother, she's supposed to love her child no matter what! She's the failure, not you. Chin up, and keep moving forward.
If she doesn't know you're actually trans and thinks you just have masculine taste (that truthfully won't be very good for you as a girl), maybe it's time to tell her. It is pretty horrible of a parent to say their kid is useless, though. Unforgivable even.
"Won't be very good for you as a girl" -- how so? I know a lot of girls who aren't very "girly" and even choose more "masculine" things and they do just fine. This statement makes no sense to me.
When I was your age I didn't hear the end of it about gay people from my dad. Whenever we would watch TV (as a, dare I say it, family) and two gay guys were on, he'd make such offensive comments and horrendous jokes. Now I've learned to ignore him because I understand he's only required to support me until I can do so myself.
Say no. And stick to it. And no matter how frustrated you feel, don't take it out on her. She will never come around if you bow to her demands, she'll just feel like she's won, and carry on pushing. But if she sees you, who you really are (at least as much as you can be), she may eventually realize who you are and start accepting you. You really sound like you'd quite like her not to talk to you . But if you want to transition, you'll have to tell her someday, so (assuming you're not in physical danger), it might be wise to come out now, and transition early. She'll come around eventually. Most people do.
I think you guys are being a bit hard on the Mother here! (not you Typical Dude!) These things are almost as hard for the parents as the kids, harder in some cases - they want you to have an easy life! I've been trying to open my mother up to me possibly having a girlfriend one day... It's a long process but you can't blame her for wanting things easy XP
Understanding why doesn't negate the feelings of rejection. It just makes it feel like things will never get better.
I find it more comforting personally, if you understand why you can understand how things can change/be changed. I don't think this woman is intentionally rejecting her child! I'm not trying to take away from how s*** it makes you feel... :/
My mother rejects me too. I understand that she doesn't hate me, that it isn't her fault, and she isn't trying to hurt me. And that means she won't change. So I have to, which is why I'm leaving.
