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A question regarding those who have highly conflicting romantic/sexual orientation

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Reptillian, Jun 22, 2013.

  1. Reptillian

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    Someone who have a highly conflicting romantic orientation and sexual orientation is someone who identifies as a heteroromantic homosexual or a homoromantic heterosexual.

    Since, the part of love and lust are not exactly triggered in the same area even if they are related, it can be argued that it's theoretically possible to have conflicting romantic orientation and sexual orientations. There's also a study mentioned by Lisa Diamonds regarding prairies showing emotional love with no sexual intimacy. So, in theory, it's possible. But, let's not talk about theories for now.

    So, are these people are more inclined to stay in the closet as society believes romantic orientation should not be heavily conflicting with sexual orientation or would they identify as bi because they are attracted to both? Would these people be more inclined to join the LGBT group or even avoid the LGBT group because many people don't experience conflicting romantic orientation and sexual orientation and they don't want to take the baggage of accusations of being a special snowflake or being confused?

    Discuss.
     
  2. Tightrope

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    Re: A question regarding those who have highly conflicting romantic/sexual orientatio

    Both, either avoidance or identifying as bi, largely because it's their unique set of feelings that some people won't validate or understand.

    "Special snowflake" seems to be the buzz word of that last year or so. It seems I hear it once every three days now. In a sense, everyone's sexuality IS a special snowflake. It's as unique as a set of fingerprints. That's what I think.
     
  3. Tetraquark

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    Re: A question regarding those who have highly conflicting romantic/sexual orientatio

    You're right that society, both within the LBGTQ community and without, doesn't acknowledge conflicting orientations. Just the other day someone on this very site was saying that homoromantic heterosexual and heteroromantic homosexual were either not valid or so rare as to not be worth considering. The only place that seems welcoming to those of mixed orientations is the asexual community, which predominantly consists of people with mixed orientations.

    I think whether someone with a mixed orientation identifies as bi or not depends on the person and the context. I know that I haphazardly switch between bi, gay (gynephilic), and asexual based on how much anime I've watched lately (animated young men are pretty much the only people I consistently find attractive, so if I've just binged on a shounen I'm much more likely to call myself bi or even homoromantic heterosexual >.>).

    In spite of all the problems, I refuse to stay in the closet. I want a girlfriend, and it will be much easier to find one if I'm out than if I'm not. There's also the matter of my gender to consider. I feel like people will be more likely to recognize my non-binary status if they know I'm queer.
     
  4. Pret Allez

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    Re: A question regarding those who have highly conflicting romantic/sexual orientatio

    The use of "special snowflake" is generally pretty abusive...
     
  5. Tightrope

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    Re: A question regarding those who have highly conflicting romantic/sexual orientatio

    Yes, every time I've heard it has been in the context of telling someone they're not entitled, either correctly or incorrectly.
     
  6. Candace

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    Re: A question regarding those who have highly conflicting romantic/sexual orientatio

    Agreed. I just say I'm gay but no specification since sometimes I like a guy for romantic reasons, and sometimes for sexual reasons. It depends on the day.