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I want to come out to my parents, but I'm really scared?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by thedemonsinme, Jul 5, 2013.

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  1. thedemonsinme

    thedemonsinme
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    Hey, erm i guess i thought I'd join this site because of how stressed and upset I've recently been getting over coming out to my parents. I've come out to my friends, and even a teacher knows, and I go to the LGBTQ society at school, so I'm not completely in the closet. However, I'm absolutely terrified about coming out to my parents. I feel really stupid because as far as I know my parents aren't homophobic, and if it turns out they are they aren't the sort of people to say anything to my face so I have no reason to be as scared as I am. My cousin came out almost a year ago so I know what most of my family's reaction will be to me coming out as a lesbian, but I can't stop myself getting really anxious and panicky and worked up about it. I've spent every evening for the last week crying over it because I'm scared, and honestly I feel stupid for being this scared when really my family are very accepting. I know that it sounds like I'm not ready, but I want to be out and I'm really frustrated because a few months ago I was ready to be out, and I'm much more scared now than I was then. I don't think it's them knowing that scares me, I think it's more that I'll have to have the conversation with them. I'm not good at talking about anything personal to adults, especially coming out to my parents. It just really terrifies me and I'm sorry about this I guess I'd just like some advice on maybe how I could do it or how I can deal with my fear better? Or even just some reassurance from people who found coming out really easy?
    Thank you c:
     
    #1 thedemonsinme, Jul 5, 2013
  2. WhisperedShadow

    WhisperedShadow
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    Hey, I understand where you're coming from. I just recently came out to my mom, whom I was TERRIFIED that she would react badly, and all she told me was that I should just keep my options open and not shut myself out to opportunities(I did tell her I still had heterosexual tendencies...) and that she was proud of me for telling her. Then again, I'm also adopted, and we weren't all that close, so....^^;
    Anyway, you can do it! I has faith in you!

    Here, a cute kitten picture for encouragement!
    [​IMG]
     
    #2 WhisperedShadow, Jul 5, 2013
  3. thedemonsinme

    thedemonsinme
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    Awh she sounds really supportive, that's great ^.^ Well done for coming out :') Awh thank you, I hope so. omg those kittens are the cutest things!
     
    #3 thedemonsinme, Jul 5, 2013
  4. GArchi1992

    GArchi1992
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    All I can say is, if you're ready and you feel totally comfortable with yourself then go for it! I'm in the same situation at the moment. I'm planning on coming out to my parents tomorrow. Scared doesn't even describe the feeling. I'm just waiting for the sense of relief that will come after I tell them and that then I can finally move on with my life. I wish you all the best, and i'm sure you'll come out in your own time! Don't rush anything if you don't feel totally ready. But good luck! I'm routing for you! (*hug*).
     
    #4 GArchi1992, Jul 5, 2013
  5. thedemonsinme

    thedemonsinme
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    I just don't know, I'm absolutely terrified. Awh thank you :') good luck coming out tomorrow!
     
    #5 thedemonsinme, Jul 6, 2013
  6. Straight ally

    Straight ally
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    Well i have some steps for your:

    1- tell them in your mind: i mean, imagine you are telling them , imagine the scenario, at what room you are talking to them, how do you feel, rehearse it, make a vivid picture of you coming out. That way is going to be easier.

    2- write a coming out letter or an email but dont send it yet, just write it and keep it stored.

    3- after you write the letter, give it to a friend to whom you came out so that person can proof read you and give you its opinion.

    4- after step 3 decide a date where you will tell your parents, maybe in a week, a month a year... And promise yourself you are going to do it, even better tell of your promise to your friend so the compromise is stronger.

    I'm a powerful mage, so i and my seven colorful friends :thewave: will send you strenght, power, will and luck xD... I wish you the best of lucks... Oh and kitties! I wish you kitties too, they are as great as good luck :icon_bigg:
     
    #6 Straight ally, Jul 6, 2013
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