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How to come out?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by samelove, Jul 6, 2013.

  1. samelove

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    I'm seriously thinking of coming out to one of my friends this coming week. I'm almost positive she will be accepting. She has a couple kids of her own, and she has mentioned that she would be accepting if either of them told her they were gay. She also said how she has always wanted a gay/lesbian friend (It's funny, I was thinking, "You already have one." when she said this lol). My problem now is I don't really know how to get the words out? It seems so random/weird to just say, "I'm gay," or, "I like girls." How did you bring it up with your friends when you came out? This will be my first time coming out to anyone offline, and I'm quite nervous about it, even though I'm pretty sure my friend is a safe person to tell first. If anyone has any advice, I'd really appreciate it!
     
  2. Randy

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    I, personally, like to integrate this into a conversation i.e bring up a past experience how a person has mentioned how accepting (s)he would be (much like yours) as opposed to stating it right off the bat. Your friend has already expressed how she would like a gay\lesbian friend, so you can start off by asking her "Remember that time that you expressed how much you wanted a gay/lesbian friend? You're looking at one/you've had one by your side the entire time" :slight_smile:

    Hope all goes well! (*hug*) (*hug*)
     
  3. Thegreatperhaps

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    I would probably just bring it up lightly and casually like: "So (friend's name here), there's something I've been wanting to tell you, and I wanted you to be the first to know since we're so close and (I trust you, I know you'll be supportive, etc). The truth is, well, I'm gay."

    And as long as you smile afterwards and are willing to comfortably answer any questions she may have, she should have no reason to feel awkward and not okay since you mentioned she wouldn't have a problem with her own children being gay.

    Best of luck, I'm sure it'll go great :*
     
  4. xxMMxx

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    Don't get completely hammered. I did it twice now and it just means you'll have to do it again because they won't believe you.
     
  5. gavguy

    gavguy Guest

    Coming out is a very hard thing to do, everyone wonders what reaction they will get and who will judge them because of this.
    Your friend does sound very supportive and that's what you need, support and guidance, and if she really is such a good friend then you will get all the support you need.
    Most people guessed I was gay years ago, and it's certain actions that I couldn't see but they pick up upon so I have a good idea that when you tell her or anyone else they might turn around and say "I thought you were".
    If things start getting too much for you then don't keep your frustration inside, talk about it with people and you will find that it will become easier with time.
    If you want a chat then contact me via my wall.
     
  6. samelove

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    Thanks for all of your advice everyone! You all are very helpful (*hug*). I'm going to be getting together with her tomorrow so we will see if there is an appropriate time to bring it up in conversation :slight_smile:.