Hello, I'm a teen who is nearly 15 years old. Neither of my parents know of me being gay(or feeling gay I should say), but I have told two very close friends, and 3 of my middle school councilors. And I mainly haven't told my parents because: 1. The way I got the gay feelings, unfortunately, was through looking at gay porn. I am ashamed of it but I can't stop for some reason. And 2. I once told them I had bi/gay feelings long ago and neither, especially my dad, were happy to hear. They have nothing against gays, in fact they have 2 lesbian friends, but they just got almost mad about it. A few things I feel you should know, is that my mom(not dad) know I watch porn sometimes, but not that it's gay. Also, I truly feel I am gay, but want to wait to be sure. So I just need someone's help, should I admit my feelings to my parents soon? Or wait until I know for sure? :help:
Well, most research shows that sexuality is pretty much set at birth or during early childhood, so it is highly unlikely you just turned gay. Next, you should not be ashamed of liking gay porn (as if that was any worse than straight porn), and porn itself is not always the best indicator of reflecting one's sexuality. Instead, think how you feel about other guys and if you've ever felt attracted to them. Since your only 14, you shouldn't worry too much about labeling yourself. Besides, your sexuality is your private business and no one else's until you decide you want to share it with them. However, your post is a little confusing since you said you never told your parents but then also claimed you said you had bi/gay feelings.
You might find your parents hard to deal with now, but it won't always be like this, if they are accepting of gays, then, more likely then not, when you grow into adulthood they will begin to respect your decisions more. If you are gay, then you are gay! Your parents may not fully understand that you are serious because you are so young, but as you mature, hopefully, so shall they! And if, someday, you decide that you are not gay, then all the power to you! You have your whole life to explore your sexuality, don't think you need to have everything figured out by the time your fourteen... (And... I was looking at Lesbian Porn when I was 12.... so it's nothing to be ashamed of ^)^)
I'm glad you've talked to your counselors. That shows you've got a good head on your shoulders. I would encourage you to continue to seek out people with whom you can feel safe and talk with them. Hopefully, that will soon be your parents. The important thing to remember is that we are all unique. You might be gay. Cool. You might just be enjoying gay porn because you're at a stage in your development when it's natural to be curious and to do some comparisons. (Just be aware that the vast majority of porn has very little to do with the way it happens in real life.) :icon_bigg Also remember that sexual feelings are just a part of who you are, gay or straight or otherwise.
I geuss I wasn't to clear/forgot to mention, it's not only the porn that made me feel gay, I also have a slight crush on one of my male friends. So yeah, I just forgot to metion that in this, and it was NOT 100% just the gay porn that got me feeling how I am. Just another day as a highly confused teen.
