Hello! I just need some advice on a certain issue I had yesterday. So my friend asked if I wanted to go to a local play with her and offered to pick me up. I accepted. After the play we went to her house and road around on her golf cart and talked a lot. While we were talking I felt like I wanted to come out to her. I kept trying to find a way to do it but I felt extremely nervous. I KNOW she will accept me after I tell her because she's a very free spirit type of person that seems to get along with everyone, but I couldn't do it. It felt like the words kept getting caught in my throat and my body felt very light and sickish (which may or may not have been from the bumps we went over on the golf cart). She's one of my best friends and I want to tell her really really badly but I just got so freaked out for no reason! Is there a way that I can get over this feeling of nervousness? This may be a naive question but I just need some advice. Thanks! TL;DR: Why am I so nervous to come out to people I know will still except me? And how do I stop being nervous about it?
You just have to let the words escape you. If you can't, just steer the conversation to something about gay/bi like gay marriage, and if you she asks you if you're gay, you can say yes instead of having to say I'm gay.
If she is as close as you say then she will support you no matter what, if you find that she doesn't want to know or is not accepting of you then I would question if she is really the close friend you originally thought.
Maybe you are afraid it will get to other people who may not be as accepting, or that her knowing may make it awkward when you are around people you are hiding it from. I have the same problem with my Best Friend, I know he will be ok with it, and he is arguably less homophobic than me, but I just don't want to come out to him till I am ready for EVERYONE to know. I think he may tell others; not maliciously but because he really doesnt think it is a big deal(my mom did this). I also think it would be awkward to hang out with him, and a friend that doesn't know at the same time, because he may witness me being dishonest and lying. It could all be subconscious, I know I am not ready to tell my friends until I am ok with how ALL of them are going to react since they are so closely knit, and a part of the same circle. It would just be weird for him to know while others don't especially when we are going to be together a lot.
