So far I've only come out to my best friend, my cousin (who is bisexual), and a few other people. I would love to be able to come out to my parents, it would make things easier, but they're pretty homophobic. My mom has gay friends, and stuff like that, but she says how it's against the bible and stuff a lot. My dad is more against it than mom, he actually won't even eat at this restaurant down the road because a gay couple owns it. My parents were actually discussing how wrong it is today. :icon_sad: I'm really close to my dad, so this is really sad for me. Plus my grandma...Sheesh. She's always saying how disgusting it is, any chance she gets really. I know if I told them, (my parents I mean), they wouldn't kick me out. At least I seriously doubt they would. My mother is like the most overprotective person on this planet. That being said, they would most definitely try to "cure" me or "pray away the gay" or some sh*t like that :/ :bang::bang::bang::bang::bang::bang: I don't really know what the point of me posting this was, I'm just really depressed over this... :icon_sad:
Mine's were like this,my mother was more neutralish... They went through a phase of 3 weeks and now they try to show that they love me as I am and they are being anoyng... too much affection. I guess my point is,tell them when you feel like it.They will always have the same reaction (good or bad) no matter when you will tell them,in a week or 10 years.
I once thought that my parents were like that. My dad has had a seriously hard time with it (imagine a 34 year old son coming out to you), but I think he's coming around. The first reaction that I got from both of my parents was that they loved me no matter what - that's what parents do. I think with your dad refusing to eat at the restaurant owned by the gay couple, it is quite possible that his feelings might change once his daughter comes out. Once it's not this nebulous class of "queer people", it can become a lot more personal, and perhaps he'd be willing to make an "exception" for you. Of course, at your age, if you feel that your safety is in any way jeopardized, i.e. having a roof over you head, then I would obviously delay coming out until you are financially independent (even though that might seem like a long time, your safety is paramount in this).
I know exactly how you feel. My parents are a bit homophobic, and it sucks to hear such negetive things from your relatives. If you want to come out to them soon, I would wait until you think it is safe to, like after you aren't living with them and they have already paid for college. But try not to let their comments bring you down.
My mother says; I have nothing against them. I just regard myself lucky that I have none of that in my family. One day I just might tell her. We don't really get along. Just don't want to say it in terms of fighting as that would be wrong and come across as spiteful. Wish you all the best, mate.
For the last two days my parents have said really terrible things about gay people. It really hurts... They don't know I'm gay.
To echo what RainbowMan said, parents will usually change their views on something if something that they're close to is conflicted with their views. I may not have put it in a 100% clear way but I think it kind of make sense.
I think its best if you come out to your parents when your dependent from them, so they won't abuse you verbally or physically, kick you out, or punish you. But its your choice when you should come out.
My dad has said he doesn't think it's "in his genetics". Like he's going to be personally offended when I actually say the words. My mom seems pretty on the fence about it - she doesn't seem to be openly against gay people, but she also doesn't seem to be supportive. Thankfully I don't think they're the type to "pray the gay away", religious though they are. But not really being able to accurately gauge their reactions has been the biggest thing keeping me in the closet. I definitely don't envy your situation, but I do wish I could at least have an idea as to how they'll react to me, good or bad. I know it'll be like they're seeing me for the first time. I'm really sorry your parents are homophobic. I would advise you don't throw this on them right now, for safety's sake.
Definitely you should wait until you're not dependent on your parents in case things do go bad. I know from experience my dad especially was quite homophobic and would often say how being gay is an illness (the ignorance is laughable) . That is until I came out and he turned out to be one of the most accepting people. At the end of the day you're still young and you have a lot of time to do it. There's no rush. Good luck with whatever you decide though, (*hug*)
My parents firmly believe there is no such thing as a bisexual and a transgender is just the result of bad parents. They are experts on the subject. They believe they are very open minded and loving but the things that come out of their mouths are shocking
It's so sad that even to this day there are so many homophobic people especially parents, and I do feel for you as it's hard enough excepting that you are gay without the added pressure of homophobic parents. Religion does play a big part in this and also people's ignorance, and it's only places like EC that have a huge support network that stop us all going completely mad. Are there any local groups or helplines you could contact ? Having the support of people that understand you and care is so important for you to gain confidence and venture further out. You have a great bunch of friends here to support you so don't feel that you are alone, someone is always close by to help you.
