So, I recently got back from church camp, and I met this guy there. Now at first it was a crush, but after the first day of hanging out, and talking, he told me he has had a girlfriend for 8 months, and that he loves her and their relationship. With that, I decided that there can be nothing there but a friendship (since I have been in the "liking your best friend" situation before and it didn't work out well). So we hung out the rest of the week and we exchanged numbers, and we have been talking non stop since we both got home about our lives, and problems we have been dealing. The whole time I have never brought up the fact that I am gay. We have talked about girls a couple times and I lied to him about it saying that there was this girl that I like, and he was giving me advice about her. Well, now I really want to come out to him. We have told each other basically our whole life stories, and he's always telling me that he likes hearing about my problems and that he'll never judge me. The only problem is that he is really involved with religious stuff. He is planning on going to bible college next year, and I feel like me telling him that I'm gay is a hit that he can't take. The thing that I am most scared of is that he may think that I am a horrible person and that he will never talk to me again. That would be the worst thing ever because he has been my person that I tell everything because I know that I can trust him, just not with this..... Should I tell him? Or should I just keep it a secret for now and tell him later?
Sometimes things can't be helped. It's a realistic possibility that he might tune you out of his life, but if he did do so, would you really want to be friends with someone who'd toss out such a great friendship just because of something like that? If you like, you could breach the subject first. What does he think about LGBT+ issues and people? From there, you could make a decision about what you should do.
Remember, Christian doesn't automatically mean homophobic. It can be scary to come out to religious people, but I've come to find that many of them believe in the non-judgemental teachings of Christ, even if the stereotype points otherwise. He sounds like a very good guy though, and although your relationship might change, it doesn't sound like he would abandon or hate you. The sooner you are honest, the better.
Thanks for the advice I told him, and he seems ok with it. He is acting like he usually does when we talk about normal problems. I have to say special thanks to Abbra. You're advice is the final push I needed to tell him.
Personally, I think I'd prefer that he stop being my friend after knowing who I really am, than pretending to be something I'm not for his sake.
