I'm not ready to come out to my dad just yet but I wanted to ask so when I am, I'm ready. Okay I haven't seem to have come out very well to parents at least. I sort of came out to Mum by accident at the stage when I was still partly figuring it out, partly in denial stage. Long story short I not entirely sure if my mum believes I'm a lesbian/bi (still not entirely sure). I have made a comment about me not liking boys when she was warning me about first time clubbing and she did just simply swap to warning me about girls so hopefully I can get things sort out eventually. I plan to come out to her again once I'm one hundred percent certain. Which I think will hopefully be sometime soon. Anyway I'm not too worry about my Mum. She said at the time when I was still confuse she would support me and I believe she will. I just wish I could stop being so nervous about it all. But anyway what I'm really worried about is coming out to my dad. See my mum and dad spilt up around the time I was born so I only see my dad once a month on sunday and it's normally just a drive to town or to go to the cinema (he lives near london so it's easier to spend the day out rather than drive to his and back to mine). Mum mention that Dad might not be okay with it but I am not entirely sure as I never really ask what his views were on homosexuality (I'm not entirely sure how to bring it up in a normal conversation). I'm really worried that if he's not okay with it that I might not ever see him again. And that's not it. I also have a little sister and baby brother (both are halves but I think them as sister and brother) who live with him and I'm worried that if he's not okay with it I may not be able to see them again. There's might also be a problem with my stepmum as she's thai. I'm not sure what the relgion is in thailand (or her relgion to be precise) and so I'm not sure what her views are. While she might be okay with it, she might not and she could ban me from seeing my siblings too even if Dad's okay with it. I just want to know that when I decide to come out what is the best way to approach it? Should I try to get him to go to his place where I can tell both him and my stepmum (often she and my baby brother can't come out with us), try and get him to come inside (which my be hard if my little sister is there), break it to him when we out or what? It would just put my mind at ease so I'm not so nervous about it all.
Elle my Belle, you're certainly stuck in a jiffy. I suggest you bring up the issue of homosexuality with you dad on a day out or something, talk about a celebrity and how they are gay/lesbian. Ask him how he feels about them, bring up someone respectful like Sir Ian McKellen or Stephen Fry. Then you should be able to get an idea of what it's like. Then from that moment to your discretion, you should tell him in private on a day out if he's okay with the idea of homosexuality or bisexuality. Now as for the Thai stepmother. She shouldn't be worrying you too much, she isn't THAT connected to you and I think you can survive without her seeing you live with your mother. Thailand practices Buddhism and the main goal of Buddhism is to find Nirvana and break from the cycle of reincarnation and suffering. Thailand is tolerant with LGBT issues, more so than nations like South Korea, and probably the most tolerant in South East Asia. Thailand has been the hotspot for LGBT tourism in South East Asia for quite sometime. I hope this helps. I sincerely hope that you will be able to show your father who you really are without any problems. Good luck.
I've also been in a tough situation with little siblings. My step sister is 13 now, and We're really close. But she lives most of the time with her mother in a much more conservative state. I'm not allowed to come out to her, because my mum and step dad think that her mother will try to drag the issue of visitation back to court. Because of this and other reasons (me not getting along with my step dad, for one), I decided this year to switch to living with my dad full time. But that means I don't get to see my sister nearly as much when she visits every other weekend. When I do go over there to spend time with her, I'm committing myself to go into the closet (which is pretty tough because that includes my gender). It also means that I can't explain to her why I'm not there all the time anymore, and it really stinks. The point of this long story is that I've thought about what it would be like if I never got to see her. One option (that isn't cowardly or shameful at all) is to not come out to your dad and step mum until your siblings are old enough that you can keep in touch with them even without their mom's and dad's blessing. However, if/when you decide you need to/really want to tell your dad, that's your choice, and I'm sure it will somehow all work out.
Thank you so much for comment. It nice to know someone is going through a similar siutation :3 As I'm still not exactly out to alot of people yet I not going to tell my dad just yet I just wanted to prepared when I do. I really don't want to be stopped from seeing my siblings they mean the world to me.
