I'm 'out' to 4 friends and my tutor right now. I've only done this recently and my family has no idea at all that I'm attracted to and want to be with girls. Let alone that I'm struggling with being 100% female as well! The beginning of university is only a matter of weeks away and I fully intend on being open about my sexuality (gender identity is more scary), but I don't want to be in people's faces. Also, I've no idea what sort of reactions I'll get. I'm hoping (expecting?) it to be more accepted at university than it might be locally to me and I've got nothing to lose because they're all strangers, so it's nothing lost if they don't like it. What's it like being part of a uni LGBT+ group? I've never really had many friends so far, so I'm worried about not fitting in and I'm also worried about being rejected by everyone else. Refusing to spend my first years of freedom from my family in the closet though! (&&&) Thanks in advance.
I'm not yet in Uni, but I am planning on being completely open about my sexuality when I get there. In my mind, I completely share your thoughts. I was at an open day the other month, and a guy went up to his boyfriend and kissed him in the middle of a big social area. And no-one batted an eyelid around them. That was what made me think I wan't to be out and completely open about my sexuality when I get to Uni. I still have a year, but the first thing I'm buying is a pride bracelet when I get there. I can't really give you any advice on your question, but I completely understand your reasoning. Good luck!
The Pride bracelet or band is a very good idea, it drops hints and if people ask you can just say, yeah I'm a lesbian, and I'm fabulous. Though to be 100% safe only do that if the university are attending is liberal or international or is situated in a cosmopolitan, metropolitan area like London, Manchester, Birmingham, Bonn, Berlin, etc... Don't be too up in everyone's face about... I'M A LESBIAN every 5 seconds, that will annoy people. Wait for them to ask you, answer then move on, you don't want your sexuality to be the only thing you have to talk about. I hope this helps and I am glad that you are about to embark on a journey as yourself and not someone else you want to be. Good luck.
Hey, thanks to both of you! I've got an offer from Edinburgh and my insurance is just outside Manchester, so both very diverse areas with a good socio-economic mix I think. So that will definitely help I'm sure. I've got a necklace, but it's not very noticeable. Which was the point, but I think a nice bracelet would be cool. No, being "Hello...I'm a lesbian!" would be weird, just like someone coming up to me and going "Hey there...I'm straight/I have a bf/gf!" would be lame too. I simply don't want to hide who I am anymore and uni is a good opportunity to do that. The uni you were at an open day for seems cool. I think a lot of universities are like that nowadays. Hopefully!
Hello. I'm about to at to go to college in a month, and I plan on being completely out at school. Where I am, it will be fine cause I'm going to a very LGBT safe art school, haha! I do agree with the other posters that the pride/rainbow bracelet is a good idea. If people know what it means, then it will be a good conversation starter. If your university has one, you could possibly join the GSA or other LGBT support group? And if not, you could really make a difference by starting one yourself. Overall, I would say just be yourself. If people ask, just let them know. However, don't let your awesome gayness dominate everything about you. Have fun at uni and good luck!
Hey FloatingPiano. We seem to be coming across eachother in a few threads That's cool, going to art school. I'm interested in art, but...not good enough to pursue beyond a hobby! There is a LGBT group at both my firm and insurance choices, so I'll definitely be joining that.
University of Edinburgh?!??!?!?!? DAMN GIRL you must've got perfect in your A-Levels or your International Baccalaureate.
Ha, thank you! Not had the results yet though, but I only need ABB in the exams I did this year. I was ill last year (PTSD reared it's ugly head) so only did half the modules. But, fingers crossed! Don't know whether to half blow my trumpet here- Cambridge didn't want me! I don't think I'm posh enough! I'm fairly confident that a city such as Edinburgh would be pretty open-minded, with fairly liberal people. It's just not knowing what sort of flatmates I'll get I suppose and being open about my sexuality is something I want to do for me, just seems like another worry on top of all the usual nerves.
Im excited for you! I plan to finish my schooling at my current university and then when I transfer by that time to be completely full time. I wish you the best of luck!
Hi I'm also starting university in september and considering the amount of people who go there are bound to be some people there who will accept you, at least that's what I'm hoping (I live in Norfolk currently and there are practically no gay/ lesbian people) so I'm hoping uni will be an opportunity to meet some. I'm just unsure on how to tell people when I'm there, like you said I don't want to be going up to people and just telling them I'm gay. Maybe it'll just be a thing where if they ask me I'll tell them? I doubt you'll be rejected by people for who you are though especially if you join a society or something
Hey Matty. Haha, yes I'm working on the same basis of 'there's bound to be somebody who's cool with me being gay!' I'm surprised about there being nobody (at least obviously) in your area, that must be rubbish. There are a fair few where I am, but not come across many girls where I am who are openly gay. Yeah, I'm thinking of just being honest if asked, not planning on arriving with a megaphone going "Hey girlies!" Have you thought about a pride bracelet and/or joining the LGBT society at the uni you've applied to? I'm pretty sure most unis have a group.
Yep I'm pretty much surrounded by farmers here and some of the most homophobic people you'll ever meet, one of the reasons I'm looking forward to uni is that there will be so much diversity in the city which is something I don't really see around here What do you mean I think a megaphone would be a great idea, at least you don't have to come out to everyone individually that way haha. I haven't looked into it yet (I've applied to Nottingham and Lincoln) I think they would both have one but I'll probably consider it more when I get my results so I know where I'm going!
Hello! Yes, haha, I guess we do! That is cool you are interested in art. What kind of art do you like? And that great! I really hope you enjoy joining the group.
Huh, I'm also planning to do this as well! Lol. I'm gonna do the whole "Ask and you shall recieve" thing instead of going around and being like "I prefer dudes over girls!" One thing that is bothering me though is that there are a couple of people from my graduating class going to this university too, and because of my luck, they are very gossipy. I'm afraid if I come out, they will instantly post it on Facebook, etc, and word will get back to my parents (because of the tight community I live in), and I don't want them to find out that way Any advice? (I really hope I'm not hijacking the thread! Sorry if it seems that way!)
I'll be attending the University of Illinois in Urbana Champaign this fall! I'm really excited to start over, with a new beginning. I'm going to be a lot more open about myself/my sexuality, but unfortunately my roommate is a guy from high school and I just found out he's religious D: There's a group called Pride, for LGBT students, which I definitely plan to join! Hopefully we all meet some gay/lesbian/bi friends c: I know I need more friends like myself :/. It's so exciting to finally be leaving high school.
Hello there! I'm in college/university for only a semester now, but I'll tell you a little about my experiences, which have been good and awesome by most part! First thing, is that much unlikely highschool everyone is MUCH more diverse, and people are not usually as immature as in hs. Which means... being gay is not a big deal at all, and specially at my university (and my course) people usually ask if you are straight, lol. First thing, you don't need to go on and tell everyone you are gay; just live it with it, and don't bother showing that you are, indeed, gay. I'll give you a situation as an example ( I'm better at that xD ): Once I was talking with some of my new classmates (some girls, on this case) and they were talking about who was the most attractive around our small campus. Many of them referred to guys, some to other girls and when they asked me I referred to guys. They didn't even show the slightest surprise... unlike many people when they find out I'm gay o.e ( I'm not clear at all ). It was spontaneous, and clear. A nice way to "come out", a term that is somewhat misleading at this point xD. Oh well, I hope this helps somehow. Good luck in College! You'll surely meet a lot of nice people.
Hey everyone. It's really nice to know that there are quite a few of us planning to go to uni/college with the intention of being open about our sexuality! FloatingPiano- honestly I haven't got a type of art that I like. I did do a school project on Mondrian tjough and loved it. Amazing how the colours just 'work' and look attractive, yet if someone else just did blocks of colour it probably wouldn't work. I liked doing clay work and printing, but I can't do either at home so it's just sketching to be honest. Nobody need worry about hijacking the thread, I quite like it when that happens because it's a better diacuasion. As far as the gossipy facebook thing goes- that's a toughie. If gossip is going to apread then there isn't a whole lot you can do. Pre-empt it and tell your parents? Honestly though, I'd like to think that the guys also going to your uni will be atarting their own brand new lives so I doubt they'll be all that interested. Especially if they get there and realise it's no big deal. I would't tip-toe around the religious guy. There will be other gay people there so he'll just have to deal with coming across it anyway. If he gives you grief then ask to move rooms. No point going to school out of choice and then feel repressed and miaerable. Gleekoo- your start to uni sounds brilliant! And that is an awesome way to tell people, just in a hit-chat. Everything you say about it fills me with confidence, thanks!
