So this guy that I work with is a really cool guy,and we get along well,but he drives me nuts sometimes. For some reason even though I told him I don't like him calling me it he keeps calling me a queer.Not often but once is enough. He says his gay friends don't mind,but I do,and he doesn't get that. I haven't told my manager about that one yet,but I will soon enough. Now this one just makes me want to punch him in the face and tell him to shut the f up! I don't know how he comes up with this. We talk about some stupid sick stuff at work,but nothing to mean what he thinks I do. He keeps saying that I play with little boys. First he said it jokingly which didn't matter,it still hurt and pissed me off,but the more and more he says it,the more serious he gets. I have told my manager about that one,which also pissed her off. Having my name slandered right to my face,calling me a child molester.That just makes me want to walk out sometimes when its just him and me working and he says that crap. My manager says she'll talk to him.It most likely won't help me working with him,now that he's gonna be pissed that I got him in trouble. Was there any alternative? I told him to stop and when he didn't I told the boss,but for some reason I feel the was something else I could have done or can still do? I'm totally sure I did the right thing! Thanks
Sometimes it's not what you say, but how you say it. If he pulls out the "playing with little boys" thing again, stop whatever you're doing. Cold. Put down your pencil, turn away from your computer, whatever it is. Tell him, "Can I talk to you? In private? Now?" Press it. Don't take no for an answer. Take him someplace private - outside, an empty room, whatever. If he refuses, say "OK, I'll say it here." Then tell him. While staring straight at him. "Child molesters are ugly hurtful creatures, and I'm sick to death of you equating me with them just because I'm gay. Maybe your other gay friends think it's oh-so-hilarious, but it pisses me off. Seriously. Stop." Lex
Well, adjust your response accordingly. But do it that way. In a non-nonsense, "look I'm not f--king around" manner. Lex
