A co worker asked me if I was gay today, I felt every bit of me say "DONT TELL HER" But my gut gave me a feeling I shouldn't lie... I'm sure she's gonna blab to everyone at work, I didn't tell her not to say anything, not that it would help. I feel like I just threw a piece of myself like meat to a bunch of dogs. Idk what to do, I said it, now I'll pay for it. I've heard several of my co workers say faggots are gross and what not. I feel kinda sick
Hmm...part of me wants to say I'm sorry and the other part of me wants to say Congratulations! It's a scary thing either way. You have every right to be nervous, but all I know is that it happened...what's done is done and you can't change it. For some reason, you told her and it was meant to happen! The outcome could be great or a bit difficult, but either way...you can deal with it. I am sure you are a strong person because a part of you had enough courage to say "I'm gay" today good for you! Just wait it out and try not to work yourself up about it. You'll get through it. Talk to me if you ever need anything. (*hug*)
Everything slows down when you tell someone for the first time lmao. Dude! This is good news. You'll be fine. Saying it in the mirror prepares you to say it to someone else. And if you weren't about ready to tell someone, you wouldn't have, trust me. Beginning to side with yourself and your feelings affirmatively is a good thing.
You are young and 18. You are a stronger person than I was at that age. In a few days I will turn 54 and I am coming out now. I am proud that you have the courage to do it now and not at 54. As far as your co-workers are concerned do not apologize what you did. With that being said, find an argument that you can use. I do not know what your joys, desires, and passions are. Give you an example, years ago I worked in a credit union. I did still have feeling of homosexual tendencies but I suppressed these desires. There was a credit union member state that she wished that all homosexuals (gays) would go to hell. She was dressed in a very nice dress, had pearls, and a fur on. This was in December. I asked her three questions which I will combine into one. Do you like the theater, the opera, and the ballet. She said yes to all three of these questions. In fact she was a season ticket holder to all of these events. I told her to give me her tickets so I could shred them. I told her that she did not deserve the tickets. I also stated that without gays there would be no opera, ballet, or theater. Sh asked if I was one of them. At the time, I was not. I am now! I touched her hand and she must of exited the building in less than 5 seconds. She is and or was a bigoted individual. Take what your co-workers say form the source. They are not informed. They may be scared and covering up their ignorance. Most people may try to say hurtful things. I am a teacher, ignore them. I did have a student this summer state another student called him gay. This student does not know I am gay. I asked are you gay? He stated no. I asked does it matter what the other student says if it is not true? He stated no. Then, ignore him. Go and live a happy life. Mother used to counsel my sister who had low self-esteem issues. I will close with this mantra from my mom. "You are as good as anyone and don't you forget it." a lot of individuals are and will be jealous of you. They will use any ammunition to hurt you. Ignore them if you can. If not, use the argument that they love, in my case, the woman who loved to go to the performing arts. Hit them with their passion when it comes to gays and homosexuality. I hope this helps. Remember, I am going through this too. Now at age 54.
The very best of luck to you. I hope all ends well. Lets hope she doesn't gossip about it and if she does then that it doesn't prove to be harmful to your career.
Thanks yall. I can safely say that I was not scared to tell her, just hesitant. I've told lots of people, certainly those who ask. Work is just different for me. After reading the replys I don't feel sick anymore, just kinda ashamed I was upset at all. I guess lately I've been really jumbled about myself I don't feel strong anymore like I used to. Thanks again for the encouragement.
You are normal. At least to us. You are hesitant, afraid, anxious, and unsure about coming out and how. Guess what so am I. I have to have the self talk and say Get Over It. There will those who accept you for who you are and those that do not. Those that do not are not worthy to be part of your life. In addition, if there is discrimination regarding coming out at work, contact EEOC and file a complaint. If you talk to management and they say that you can't do anything. Repeat these letters: I will call E -E-O-C. You will see how fast they back peddle. I do not rememberthe situation, however, my nephew was having issues at his work. This had nothing about sexual identity. But harassment, I think. I told him the same thing. He stated that they back peddled faster than you could have imagined. Just look them up on the internet and get their phone number and email address.
