Slightly homophobic friend keeps asking if I'm gay...

either decide you are going to "fix" him into liking gay people or dump him...

Out yourself to him and just let him deal with it. Don't let him drag you down

 

Hmm.. I usually combat that by taking the opposite stance. And I say, "well, I do believe people should have equal rights" And it has gotten to the point before where someone has said, are you gay? And I'm like, "yeah, gotta problem with it?" lol. That may not be the best advice.. but a scenario. I would say.. a good defense, is a better offense. When he asks you if you're gay just say.. "You sure ask a lot. Are you gay?" "What if I was? Would that change something for you?" Those are two suggestions that are almost certain to make him back down a little out of weirdness. He sounds pretty immature really.. It is one of the more difficult situations when you're not ready to come out. The only other option would be to start limiting your association with him.

 

My bro says a lot of dumb shit without thinking. Things he's just not too informed about, he still thinks it's okay for him to form an opinion about. So one thing I did with him before coming out was to combat his arguments and make him look insensitive. It'll work with this guy. Just tell him you don't like how he talks about it and that you believe that there should be equal rights.. basically, put the foot in his mouth for now. Another thing.. YOU'RE too good of a friend to dump. Remember that. We can't let other people have us compromising who we are. Think about yourself first in this matter and be true to who you are. True friends will stick with you no matter what and the rest can kick rocks. Flip that word association to favor yourself.

 

Well, I think you have the potential to change his mind about the LGBT community. If it is eating you up, tell him the truth. If he does not want to be friends with you anymore because of that, it is his loss and he really was not that great of a friend. If he needs time to accept it and comes around, that is great! Good luck with whatever you do.

 

I'd say tell him. He has to choose either friendship or hate, and if he chooses wrong, you're better off without him. There would be some hope for a change of heart, though, so if he does avoid you for awhile, you probably shouldn't write him off forever.

 

Haha, I've been there (he's not a close friend, though, but he's relatively anti-gay and I wouldn't want him to find out and spread it). My most common response is simply that I support gay rights, but then again I've never called a guy hot (or a girl in your case) in public, so that might not work out. Maybe refrain from making comments about women in that way in front of him and instead use words like beautiful or pretty or some other word that doesn't sound sexual?

---------- Post added 30th Jul 2013 at 07:27 PM ----------

Yeah, this too.

 

I think you should tell him. You might change his mind about gay people.

 

First, BREATHE!!

If he asked "Are you gay?" I would reply why do you ask? Wait for his reply. I might also say would it make any difference if I was? At this point, if he say NO, then you can come out and say good, I am gay. You may also ask if he is gay?

Do not make the errors that I have. Do not try to please all people. You can not. I will be 54 on Saturday. I have suppressed my sexuality for decades. I am lonely due to my insecurity of my sexuality. Do you have any friends that are LGBT? Try to find someone that you can discuss this in confidence. You will be okay. This transition is difficulty for all of us.

 

I would just tell him and if he does not want to be friends with you anymore then you will know he wasn't a real friend in the first place.

 

He's probably ignorant and that can be understandable.