I have an acquaintance, someone I would never want for a friend, and I've lost track of him. From his various hook ups, he once had sex with a married guy. He told me he was downtown in one of the major upscale department stores buying a pair of shoes. He told me he saw this guy he had had sex with in the same area of the store with his wife and kids. His delight that this guy was really uncomfortable and edgy, fearing that this acquaintance might approach this guy with the family, was almost perverse. I told him "Would you really get that much out of it if you swooped in on him and his family and dropped this news on them?" He answered "Well, he shouldn't have been slumming with the queers." I sort of shook my head. He then thought about it and said "Nah, I wasn't going to out him, but he was scared." This is probably a situation that happens over and over, and can even happen in a large city. My attitude is that if someone you've messed around with crosses your path, you need to respect their space if in a different setting, unless both of you are alone, there is eye contact, and an implied vibe that you want to acknowledge each other and maybe talk. What do you think?
I think that you are totally right. Some people have no consideration for boundaries or respect for a fellow human being. I just want to sit these people down sometimes, and ask them how they would have felt if they were in their shoes, although the same people who would do something like that also probably have very little capacity for empathy or imagination.
Tightrope, well, you're right of course, as is Tyrawr. You have to respect obvious boundaries like that if you're a decent person. Do unto others, huh? That acquaintance you talk of, who got such delight from the guy's anxiety, and had such disdain for him, suggests a disordered personality to me. Sounds like a shit. Often the first to complain when they feel they've suffered. Frankly, outing someone is a mean act, and an invasion of privacy. I've said elsewhere it's morally repugnant. Why do it? The reasons vary widely- fear, malice, carelessness, control, agenda etc. I've been subject to it myself, it's not pleasant. Leaves you feeling confused, angry, ambushed. Tightrope, you gave me some advice related to this on a recent post (my first ever) in another section, so thanks. I've posted you another question there, since I couldn't private message you, so I hope you can read it. ---------- Post added 13th Aug 2013 at 01:37 AM ---------- Tightrope, well, you're right of course, as is Tyrawr. You have to respect obvious boundaries like that if you're a decent person. Do unto others, huh? That acquaintance you talk of, who got such delight from the guy's anxiety, and had such disdain for him, suggests a disordered personality to me. Sounds like a shit. Often the first to complain when they feel they've suffered. Frankly, outing someone is a mean act, and an invasion of privacy. I've said elsewhere it's morally repugnant. Why do it? The reasons vary widely- fear, malice, carelessness, control, agenda etc. I've been subject to it myself, it's not pleasant. Leaves you feeling confused, angry, ambushed. Tightrope, you gave me some advice related to this on a recent post (my first ever) in another section, so thanks. I've posted you another question there, since I couldn't private message you, so I hope you can read it. 3rd Aug 2013 02:10 PM
