so I was thinking, facebook would make everything so easy, my best friends already know about me, but if I just change my status to "likes boys", everyone would know immediately and would make the progress so fast, is this a good idea? I have the feeling I just want everyone to know immediately and I think I can handle it, I don't see anybody that would cause a problem, and I have my 3 best friends that will always have my back. so, your thoughs?
The day I post to Facebook will be my "official" coming out day. I'm planning some kind of a message in addition to that, though, for a few different reasons. Sort of feel I need to come "clean" as I come out.
I sort of came out via facebook...I put myself as in a relationship with my boyfriend at the time. No one really questioned it and everyone was very "Oh, he has a boyfriend?...okay then." Which was nice. Before this I had told all of my good friends and my family, although there were people annoyed at me for not telling them personally. In hindsight it was a terrible way to come out and I'd have much rather done it quite differently, oh well though. My only advice in this is too PLEASE make sure everyone you are close to knows, it's quite crushing for someone if they think their friend doesn't like them enough to tell them before everyone else! Good luck
Ultimately, I used Facebook to come out to acquaintances by a general cryptic post about 'it being Facebook official'. Alas, if you've got any close friends on there, I can see it hurting them. Honestly, I would only use Facebook as the last in the process, if you get what I mean, the 'coming out to everyone else'. Although to me, coming out was a very personal experience, so I knew I couldn't come out to anyone close via a general Facebook message...
As a side thought to this, I was also thinking of sending messages to sub groups, i.e. one message to this group of friends, a separate message to cousins, then tell rest of my extended family, etc. And only sending a general update after those special groups are satisfied.
I've considered it... But it's hard. Some people will be upset. If you do, make sure you have a clear out of any arseholes. I cleared mine out, and went from 650 to 244 friends :haha:
well, I clear mine out every year, and stay stable at about 70, everyone that I haven't seen in the past 6 months/don't know anymore/isn't someone I want to meet in the future again gets deleted, that's why I'm thinking about it, only people that I know and that can know are the ones that I have as a friend on facebook. I only mainly have 3 best friends, and they already know. The only other persons that may get upset for not telling them would be maybe my 4 brothers and my mom. But it's hard to come out to family, so this would make it easier as in: brother asking me, did a friend do it or are you serious? and then it would start a conversation, also my mom doesn't have facebook, so she would know through a talk of me with my brother or something, I don't know why, but the easiness of it all makes it so more compelling.
I would suggest doing a separate, first message to just your brothers, maybe even privately. I don't know you or your relationship with your brothers, of course, but it's the lumping in with everyone else that they may not appreciate. Addressing why you lumped everyone in together is an option, I suppose, but people typically appreciate the direct, personal touch.
You could use this, it's something I made a while back but still haven't used... post it as your cover photo or whatever
As soon as my parents know, I'm going to change my FB. They're the only people that prevent me from doing so because I wouldn't want them finding out through other family members...
I love this since I love anime and japanese would be fun, people who would like to know can try to decipher it well, my relation is okay, but it's not like we are best friends and so on, I'm a twin and find him annoying and all my other brothers are older than me. It's just that it wouldn't change anything, me being gay or not, and I'm also not sure if they would mind being told with all the rest or something. I just have no idea. The idea of telling them feels weird. I just don't know if I can, but I don't mind them knowing, it's weird.
Make sure you personally tell everyone that's important to you first. I came out via FB in the end and I have no regrets.
I like the idea of treating it like it's no big deal. "I don't know who knows or who doesn't anymore, but in case you missed the memo, I'm gay. And now, this gay guy is going to the movies." Lex
I like Lex's post ---------- Post added 26th Aug 2013 at 07:32 PM ---------- I think when I choose to come out, I'm just goin to act like they already know. Like 'me and the girlfriend are off to NG1' (NG1 is a Nottingham gay club ) and if anyone says anything ill be like 'yuh, I'm gay, didn't you know?'
I once thought of using the "i am interested in" part of facebook to reveal myself but then decided not to. You may want to try it, but I'm unsure of whether people may notice it or not
well yeah, that's kinda what I'm going for, why stay in the closet? what difference does being gay make. Nothing, so why make such a big deal over telling people? The friends that should now already do. I just like the idea of: -day1: post maybe a message and change interested to men. -day2: having everyone ask if it was a joke of a friend for writing it or if I mean it -day3: kinda the same as day 2 but people will have started talking, so non facebook friends will know and maybe ask. -day 4: everyone knows. so 4 days to come out to the world. Now I would kind of hate it, just like telling someone, but if they come with the question it's easier, also, I'm a very strong person, so I just haver to stay strong for 2 3 days and everything would be over then, that's what I like about it, I'm also hoping for other people to maybe approach me, but that's something big to ask, 1/11 or so is gay/Bi, so it should give them some confident? I'm a person that like always is friendly and tries to help everyone, and I think that this will help so many people that are in the same situation as me, I would love it if someone at my school did this. about this, in the earlier days of facebook it got like a more bigger message, just like changing from single to in a relationship, but yeah, I'll have to post something to, people will surely comment and maybe like that post, this will actually make it appear more on top of everyones feed and so be seen by everyone faster, the talking will do the rest, just need to do it on like Wednesday midday, enough time for them to see, 2 days for people to start talking, and then a weekend where I can lay back and relax. just one problem that I see is my twin brother. I for a fact know he's gay (50% change) but I saw him chatting about it, so yeah. It may get awkward or maybe he'll come out to, I have no idea, we aren't really that close, so it feels weird. but yeah, any more thought's or suggestions, just post them, I love to read them all
