Coming out letter *first draft*

Perhaps "fuck off" isn't the best phrase. Use something civil, but still hostile, if you must. And on that note, is the absolutely accusatory tone necessary?

 

I see you're setting yourself up for great success /sarcasm

If you're going to come out to your parents, perhaps you should do it in a more "appropriate" way so that your sexuality doesn't become yet another thing that stands between you and your parents, even if your relationship with them already isn't very good. Else, why bother?

 

Maybe you should you should use this as an opportunity to at least build up your relationship with your mom. Tell them how you are telling them this because they are such an important part of your life. Even if you don't love your parents, try and make it a little less confrontational.

 

I'll help. Here:

Seriously, there's no need for all that hatred in a coming out letter. Just tell them that you're gay and move on with your life. If you really don't want them to be part of your life, just cut it nice and short.

 

^ i agree with the above post, i think you should go with that if you want something good out of this.

while i don't know your back story, they are your parents, they gave you life.

and if they never fully understand (like think gay sex is filth) then you can't force them too or forever hold it against them. we're gays not fascists.

good luck!

 

I actually believe that it doesn't matter that your parents "gave you life" and whatnot. It was their decision, so you do not owe them anything.

My main point with removing the anger and hatred from the letter is that it's essentially used for something that will never amount to anything positive. Hatred is basically dedicating a certain part of your life, of your thoughts, to the very thing that you would be better off without. If you don't like someone, don't dedicate a part of your thoughts to that person. Instead, move on with your life, and fill that empty part of your thoughts with something more constructive.

 

It's natural and understandable what you're going through. :icon_sad:

Nevertheless, for a coming out letter it's best to write as objectively and positively as possible. Hate and anger will only destroy you. Don't let them win. :icon_wink

 

You have to ask yourself the purpose of your letter. I'm afraid some of the phrases will likely antagonize them. Of course it depends also on how you usually communicate to them, which we don't have any idea. The tactic of 'accept me or fuck off' is more suited for people you haven't known your whole life and who didn't give you life for that matter. It's what you tell some asshole coworker or recent acquaintance who's giving you a hard time. The whole "you are blind and should have known" could also set them off.

You're rightfully angry, but all the more reason to not flip out at them. Wait till you calm down and write a letter that can possibly (though maybe not likely) win them over.

 

I totally agree with the above reply.