This should be fun. So basically, I've identified as an asexual for nearly a year now. I always thought of myself as heteroromantic and for the most part that was correct. Until I began questioning that about a month- a month and a half ago. Skip forward through all the confusion and questioning, and my feelings about my orientation have finally solidified ( (!) ). And I've decided that I'm actually biromantic. Now, being sure of my orientation once again is great and all that. But now I come to my main problem, I have to come out to everyone as bi now, too. I've already told a few people in the past that I was asexual, but seeing how I didn't know I was biromantic, they obviously don't either. I think coming out as biromantic will be harder for me than coming out as asexual, which was bad enough. And what's more, I feel like it will be even more awkward for the people I've already told I was asexual because I'll essentially be coming out to them a second time. This could end up a long, slightly painful, and definitely anxiety ridden road. But at least I'm pretty sure I'm going to do it... I think. I guess this post was for venting as well as just asking for general advice and support. Thanks for reading
Romantic attraction is who you would feel the need to "get closer" to and/or form a romantic relationship. Sexual attraction is just that, that kind of gut feeling you get and think someone you see is "hot" or you could see yourself in bed with them And it's what asexuals don't experience
Haha, guess "being terrified of being intimate with anyone" is a third category then. EDIT: Sorry for hijacking the thread.
I'm wondering if the distinction would matter to most of your friends? Maybe if you had romantic feelings for them. However it is important to you.
Honestly. The distinction between asexual and sexual matters less to me. Since that's more personal, and I've only told a few people that. Mostly out of the fact that I'm also demiromantic. And the only people I've told are my mother, my ex-girlfriend (I'd figure she'd want to know), and another asexual. But I'd think that coming out as biromantic would be as important as coming out as bi/homosexual is to others. It's kind of like saying if saying your bisexual wouldn't matter unless you had feelings for one of your friends if you want to think about it that way. Though it may very well be that way for you, I of course can't assume :lol:
Personally, I came out as bi before coming out as gay, but that was back when I was questioning. Everyone who I came out to as bi now know the change, but I did it far less 'officially' as I did with coming out 'the first time'. It was more just offhand comments rather than another set of coming out experiences. Plus you haven't come out to many people, so the 'damage control' isn't massive. You can rectify it while allowing people to understand. If I were you, I would drop a comment or two to clear things up with the people who already know, it hasn't got to be anything official. As for anyone else you decide to come out to, come out as what you feel comfortable as. Regardless of what other people know.
Haha, just wrote a reply to CountDuckula about a very similar situation - so I'll paste it here: I was asexual once... and telling people I'm gay was no big deal. I mean, it was, but overriding your past identification shouldn't be hard. Just tell them you discovered more about yourself than you originally knew. Nobody has ever questioned my change.
I see what you're saying. Why should I bother with identifying as bisexual if it only matters to my sex partner. My personal reason for identifying is to become more active in LGBT rights and to be honest with my friends and family. Is that what you're saying?
