When I first came out to my friends, I told them that I was asexual when I'm actually gay. I want to come out for real now and tell the truth, but I don't know how. How should I bring it up without being awkward, and what should I say? I don't want them to think that I intentionally lied to them or that I was afraid of their reactions, because I'm actually not afraid that they will reject me (I know that they have no problems with gay people). Any advice would be awesome. Thanks.
If you know they won't reject you, I would just tell them. If they ask why you 'lied' to them, just tell them you weren't 100% comfortable with the label 'lesbian' then. I would try slip it into conversation. If the conversation turns to say relationships, or equal rights, it would be 'intended', but seem far more natural than blurting it out loud. That could reduce the awkwardness that you worry about. Ultimately though, if you believe they would accept you, I don't think there would be much awkwardness.
Thanks for the reply. I agree that it would be much easier if they were to bring up the topic, but my friends and I don't tend to talk about sexuality much, so I'm not sure when an opportunity to have that conversation naturally will come up. Maybe not on their part, but I am a very awkward individual, who is very shy when it comes to talking about sexuality.
I was asexual once... and telling people I'm gay was no big deal. I mean, it was, but overriding your past identification shouldn't be hard. Just tell them you discovered more about yourself than you originally knew. Nobody has ever questioned my change.
Thanks for the help. I don't want them to be upset that I lied to them, so I think I'll act like this is a new development.
I just found out my flatmate identified as such for 10+ years. It felt good to hear that from other people. Good luck!
Hi there! As it was mentioned above, you can say that you have discovered additional pieces about yourself, that it feels right for you and that it corresponds to the feelings you have experiencing since you have spoken to them about your sexuality to them. I wouldn't worry about having lied to them. You didn't. You have just become aware of other feelings and attractions. Good luck!
